Of Heists and Hustles
by IronicSnap
Summary: The world's largest gemstone has arrived in Zootopia! Sly wants to steal it. Judy wants an adventure. Nick just wants his partner to survive to the end of the week. Things are complicated by a foxy Interpol inspector and a rival gang led by a dangerous, shadowy mastermind. As new relationships are forged, old ones begin to strain...
1. The Good, the Bad and the Sly

Night in Zootopia.

It was a historic night. An optimist would say for a city as great as Zootopia, every night is historic. A pessimist would say that maybe the more accurate statement is that every night is equally unimportant. A master thief would say that the night the world's largest gemstone arrives is pretty notable.

The Nope Diamond was going to be the greatest attraction ever housed at the Zootopia Natural History Museum. Three armoured trucks were bringing it through the brightly lit streets. Given its immense value, the ZPD had naturally been tasked with safeguarding it. Officer McHorn was in charge of the operation, driving the primary truck alongside Officer Delgato. Officers Wolford and Higgins were in the front truck, Officers Fangmeyer and Snarlov had the truck in the rear, and Officers Judy Hopps and Nick Wilde – the department's first rabbit and first fox, lauded by their fellow officers and the public for stopping a conspiracy which threatened the entire city – were on the other side of District One on traffic duty.

"Aaaaaaagh," said Judy.

"Hang in there, Fluff," said Nick. He was relaxed in the passenger seat of their cruiser, hands behind his head. He was wearing his aviators despite the fact it was nearing 9pm – he wore them constantly on the job. "Not much longer 'til we can call it a night."

"I don't want to call it a night! This is not _a night!_ " Judy gripped the steering wheel tightly. "We could be there, Nick! We could be helping!"

"What, you're questioning Chief Bogo's judgement? Think you could run the department better?" teased Nick. "Just relax." He cast a worried eye to how Judy's foot was tapping furiously right next to the pedals. "No, but seriously, relax," he added. "Please don't crash the car. I'm far too handsome to die."

Judy sighed heavily. "I'd just feel better if I could help out with something this important."

Nick chuckled. "Define 'important'. Can't be death-defying adventure every time, Carrots. The everyday stuff is important too."

"That's true," conceded Judy. "That's completely true. It's just... this doesn't feel right."

* * *

A dark silhouette was cast against the shining full moon. Lithe and wiry, he stood on a rooftop, the moonlight glinting off the large golden crescent at the tip of the cane he gripped in one hand.

The grey raccoon watched the street below him. The wind was cold up here. It pushed at his navy shirt, threatened his matching cap, and lightly ruffled the black cloth of his entirely extraneous domino mask. But he was in his element – physically, at least.

Sly Cooper, legendary thief, put a gloved finger to his ear. "I dunno, Bentley. This just doesn't feel right."

A nasal voice came in through his earpiece. "For the last time, Sly, this is our _only_ chance at the diamond! The museum's too well protected – we need to hit the truck!"

Sly paced along the roof impatiently, entirely unconcerned by the several storeys between him and ground level. "It's so anti-climactic, though. This isn't a heist, it's a hit and run. It's not exactly going to sound impressive in the history books."

The turtle sighed. "I still can't sell you on the 'But the diamond never even _arrived_!' angle, huh?"

"I'm just saying," Sly just said, "a daring heist of the museum feels a lot more appropriate."

A third voice joined in, contrasting Sly's rich tones with a loud energy. "Guys, this is taking too long!"

"Murray's right," said Sly. "I've been up here for like half an hour now. I'm running out of dramatic poses."

" **The Murray** _always_ appreciates dramatic pose etiquette, but that's not what I mean!" said the hippo. "They should've driven past by now!"

"That's an... excellent point," said Bentley, concern creeping into his voice. "The convoy's been delayed. According to my intel..." A pause as he consulted his computer. "...they're still several blocks away."

Sly smirked. "I'll investigate."

"What? No! We need you in position!"

"I'll get into position once I find the truck." Sly was already running for the far side of the roof. "I can keep up with it, Bentley. This is _me_ we're talking about."

Bentley sounded uncertain. "Just... be quick about it."

The edge of the roof was approaching. "Always am."

And then he jumped.

* * *

The truck hit another red light. McHorn huffed.

Delgato raised an eyebrow. "What?"

"The lights," McHorn replied stiffly. "They're not right. Every junction turns red as we get to it."

The lion sat up. "You think something's wrong?"

"Maybe, maybe not. Let's not take the chance. Ask HQ if we can go red."

"On it." Delgato flicked on the truck's radio. "Clawhauser, this is Delgato. Requesting permission to go red, over."

The cheetah's good-natured voice came in crisply. "Roger that, Del, gimme just a tick..." Delgato shot McHorn a smirk. The rhino rolled his eyes. "Alright, the Chief says you're clear!" Clawhauser said after a brief pause.

"Copy that, Clawhauser. Delgato out." The lion switched frequencies. "All convoy units, we are going red."

After two curt confirmations from the other trucks, McHorn turned on his truck's sirens. The others followed suit, and the convoy tore through the junction, cars awkwardly moving out of its way.

"No more red lights," said Delgato.

"Don't relax yet," McHorn said. "It's a long way to the museum. Something could still go wro-"

With a furious roar, a muscular figure landed on the front truck.

"-ng."

* * *

Sly ran along a telephone wire and jumped. He fell and hooked his cane in the crook of a street lamp and let the momentum take him and swung up, then landed neatly on the next roof, tucking into a roll. And then he was running again.

Zootopia was beautiful at night. And the view was always better from the rooftops.

As he cleared the roof and grabbed a pipe to climb to the next one, Bentley's voice crackled onto the comms. "You there, Sly?"

"Read you loud and clear, pal."

"It looks like the convoy has suddenly come to a complete halt."

Sly reached the top and jumped up, running to the other side. "Thanks for the heads up. I'll pick up the pace."

* * *

Officer Wolford was backed against the armoured truck, gripping his radio tightly. "Clawhauser, we need backup, and _now_! We've got three officers down!" Fangmeyer slammed against the truck next to him, striped arms flailing. Wolford started. "Uh, four officers down!"

A broad-shouldered shadow passed over Wolford, covering him completely. A large grey fist grabbed him by the collar of his uniform.

Wolford's ears drooped in resignation. "F-... five officers down."

* * *

Nick stared in concern at the cruiser's radio. Judy's purple eyes flicked calmly between it and the road.

"Repeat, this is an emergency broadcast," came Clawhauser's voice. "Be advised that the convoy has a... uh, a _situation_. We have lots of calls for backup, so if all units in the area – repeat, _all_ units – could just, uh, head on over -"

"Hopps," said Nick, "let's be smart about this, okay?"

"Oh, totally," said Judy. "Totally, totally smart. As we rush towards adventure and save the day. Again." She gleefully activated the siren and sped the car toward the co-ordinates Clawhauser was giving out.

Nick rubbed his eyes. "Oh, god."

* * *

Sly stopped just above the convoy. After many years as a thief, he was used to violent, even bizarre, sights. Even still, the scene gave him pause.

The trucks were messily piled on a road by the canal. The front truck was on its side, its upper wheels still slowly spinning. The middle and rear trucks had stopped awkwardly, not quite in line with the road. Officers lay scattered and moaning, but there didn't appear to be any causalities.

"Something hit these guys hard," Sly said into his earpiece. "But I don't-"

Suddenly, McHorn flew into view from behind the middle truck. The huge cop slammed into the third truck's front, but recovered. Sly could see that the holster on his belt had been roughly torn off. With nothing else, the rhino raised his fists defensively.

A snow leopard exploded from the same place McHorn had emerged. He was massive. He only wore a pair of purple slacks, leaving his powerful torso uncovered. He ran at McHorn on all fours, snarling.

McHorn readied himself but he couldn't prepare for the leopard's brutally fast movements. He leapt at the officer and fired off a combination of strikes that Sly almost couldn't follow: right hook left hook right kick left kick roundhouse. McHorn blocked the punches with his arms but the kicks surprised him, catching him in the stomach. His guard failed and the leopard slammed a palm into his face. McHorn fell with a grunt.

The leopard let him drop. He looked around. His eyes travelled upwards and Sly quickly ducked back into the shadows. He waited for a few seconds. No sound from below.

Sly peered over the roof. The leopard was satisfied. He left the officers where they were and went to the main truck. He took hold of the handles of the back doors, and then pulled. He pulled and growled to himself and _pulled_ and the doors burst open, a few pieces of metal flying loose.

Sly raised an eyebrow. " _He probably could've just taken the keys off a cop_."

The snow leopard stomped inside. Sly went to the edge of the roof. Finding a pipe, he slid easily to ground level. "Yeah, guys, we have... competition. Big, angry competition," he murmured. "I'm going for the diamond."

" _ **What?!**_ " Bentley yelled. "If there's a threat, wait for us!"

"He'll get away! I have to at least slow him down." Sly crept toward the truck. Some officers watched him as he passed, but the snow leopard had been brutal and they weren't about to stop him. "Try to get here as fast as you can, but for now, I'm going in."

He reached the truck.

The convoy held a state-of-the-art containment unit – just one of many high-end toys the museum's curator had procured for the exhibit. The Nope Diamond sat in a small dome of reinforced glass. The dome was on top of a black box with a handful of visible lights. The device looked innocuous, but was actually a labyrinth of alarms, requiring careful, precise handling in order to be disarmed. It was Sly's role in his team's quote unquote "heist" to deactivate it, and he was one of the few people on the planet who could possibly pull off such a task.

Tai Lung walked up to it, examined it for a moment, and then punched it. The glass shattered. The box immediately let out a chorus of wailing alarms. Tai Lung punched it again and it went quiet.

Sly winced. A part of him died a little.

Tai Lung took the diamond and turned around. His golden eyes widened when he saw Sly, as though he was shocked – insulted – that someone could approach him silently.

"Hey there," said Sly guardedly. "It's okay, you probably didn't know, but that's _my_ diamond to steal. So how about you just scamper back to where-ever you came from, alright?"

Tai Lung took a second to look him up and down. Suddenly his fist was flying at Sly's face.

Sly tilted his head out of the way, looking mildly put out. "Rude."

Tai Lung snarled and struck again, but he only used his free hand and it was all too easy for Sly to lean nonchalantly out of the way. Tai Lung kicked out and Sly slipped back, his cane reaching out and snatching the diamond from Tai Lung's grasp.

"Thanks, Snowflake!" Sly turned and went to leave, breaking into a sprint.

He must not have been fast enough. A fist closed around his shirt collar and a second later he was flying backwards into the truck. Sly hit the back wall, disorientated. The diamond fell from his hand.

Tai Lung stalked toward Sly, one fist at the ready. The thief wasn't going to get in his way again. He took a step forward and suddenly a grey blur flew in from nowhere and kicked off of Tai Lung's fist so hard that he punched himself in the face.

Judy landed smartly, eyes on the leopard. "I never get tired of doing that," she whispered to herself.

Tai Lung wobbled slightly, dizzied from the force of the blow. He recovered quickly and whirled around. When he saw Judy, he seemed entirely at a loss, but his amazement soon melted into something more controlled.

"You... hit me. You actually hit me." His voice was quiet and oddly refined. "I'm impressed." He took a few steps towards her. "I am also very, very angry," he added calmly. "You are going regret that _immensely_."

"ZPD!" said Judy, flashing her badge. "You are under arrest for -" and then Tai Lung leapt at her.

Judy rolled out of the way, but Tai Lung was fast. Despite his size, he was precise, controlled in his movements. He missed her but turned on his heel and went for her again. Judy used the cramped space to her advantage, kicking off the walls of the truck, dodging through Tai Lung's arms.

Outside, Nick was still checking on the wounded officers, his sunglasses tucked into his shirt pocket. His ears perked at a sound, and he noticed the main truck was rocking on its wheels.

"Um," he said.

The truck's motion jostled Sly into regaining his focus. His eyes landed on the Nope Diamond, lying defencelessly on the floor. It glinted in the half-light. All he had to do was take it and slip away.

Judy flew straight through Tai Lung's grasp and kicked him hard in the nose. Tai Lung yelled, falling on one knee and curling up.

Judy landed neatly in front of him, folding her arms. "That's more like it. As I was saying, you are under arrest for -"

Tai Lung shot up like lightning and grabbed her in one huge fist. He slammed her into the truck's wall with a loud bang, grabbing Sly's attention. Judy immediately started kicking at his arm, but he was too strong.

"You idiot." Tai Lung unsheathed the claws of his free hand, his eyes narrowing. "I'm going to make you to _remember_ this." Judy's hard expression faltered, memories getting the better of her.

From the floor, Sly glanced from Tai Lung to the diamond and back again.

It would've made for a bad story anyway.

Sly jumped up and tackled Tai Lung at the shoulder. It was like hitting a wall – the leopard was as solid as stone. Sly recovered quickly, bringing his cane down hard on Tai Lung's head. For a family heirloom, it made an excellent weapon.

Tai Lung took a few blows before retaliating. He rolled his shoulder, dislodging Sly. He twisted diagonally and shot out a kick, knocking Sly into the opposite wall from Judy. He grabbed Sly with his free hand, pinning him against the wall at the neck. He stood there, facing the door, Judy in one hand and Sly in the other.

"Hah!" said Sly. "What exactly are you going to do now, smart guy?"

Tai Lung tightened his grip on Sly's windpipe.

"Oh," managed Sly.

Nick appeared in the doorway. He looked uncertainly, rapidly, between the three. "What the hell is going on in here?!"

Judy wiggled ineffectually. "Hi, Nick!"

Tai Lung huffed in exasperation. He looked around the truck, unwilling to release Judy or the increasingly desperate Sly. He noticed the diamond below him. With two sharp motions, he bounced it off the floor with his foot, then kicked it at Nick's face.

Nick's eyes widened and he threw his arms up, barely managing to catch the gem. Tai Lung threw Sly at him, threw Judy into the back of the truck, and jumped forward.

Sly hit Nick and they both rolled on the road, Sly coughing and catching his breath. The diamond skidded along the tarmac before coming to a stop. It gleamed, entirely unharmed.

Tai Lung bent to pick it up and Judy flew in, kicking him in the back of the head. He tipped forward and Sly struck him full-force in the face with his cane. Tai Lung growled and Nick pulled himself up to shoot Tai Lung in the knee with his shock pistol.

Tai Lung roared furiously at the sting of the electricity. " **Enough of this!** " He grabbed Judy by the ears and Sly by the cane and bashed them into each other before flinging them in opposite directions. He kicked at Nick angrily, his technique sloppy. He caught Nick in the shoulder but the fox managed to get a hand on the diamond before momentum threw him back into the wall of a nearby shop.

Nick grunted on impact and tried to recover as quickly as the instructors at the Academy had demanded. Tai Lung approached him slowly. His voice was low. "Give. Me. The _diamond_. Fox."

Nick noticed a familiar look in the leopard's eye. "What, this diamond?"

"I _won't_ ask again."

Nick smiled. "Here." He threw it as hard as he could.

Tai Lung's eyes widened in genuine shock and he turned, following its path. He jumped for the diamond but Sly stepped on his shoulder and reached for it but Judy bounced off the ground then Tai Lung's face then Sly's chest and flew towards it, wrapping her arms around it in mid-air.

" **A-HA!** " yelled Judy triumphantly. "I got it! And there's nothing _either_ of you can-" and it was at that point she fell into the river.

She disappeared into the dark water with a muted splash. Sly moved forward, concerned, before getting punched in the back.

He rolled and managed to recover before Tai Lung came at him again. He was furious now. Unfocused. Easier to dodge, but deadlier.

Nick pulled himself up, took one look at the kung fu warrior trying to murder the master thief, and promptly gave them a wide berth. He ran to the river, trying desperately to remain focused. "Judy! _**Judy**_ **!** "

Tai Lung heard it first, the sound snapping him out of his rage. It soon became clear to Sly as well. Sirens. Sirens from all sides. From both ends of the street, walls of bright lights and wailing noise approached.

Tai Lung and Sly each took stock of the armada of police cars. Tai Lung seriously considered staying, fighting his way through the entire city if he had to. But too much had gone wrong already. Another time.

Tai Lung glared at Sly and ran a finger along his throat. Sly shrugged and gave him a bland smile.

They ran for different roofs.

Nick stood on the bank of the canal. He'd found a ring buoy. He didn't realize how tightly he was gripping it. His eyes followed the movements of the water easily despite the darkness. His heart was in his throat.

Judy exploded loudly, inelegantly, out of the water. She held the diamond tightly against her chest.

" _Ohthankgod_ ," Nick muttered. " **Judy!** Judy, are you alright?"

Judy spat a mouthful of river water right onto the diamond. She didn't notice. "This thing is heavy, Nick!" she called, a little woozily. "Diamonds are really _heavy_!"

Nick smiled. He felt tired. "That's... that's great, Judy." He threw the ring buoy out to her. "Just keep a hold of it, okay?"

He dragged her back to the river bank. Judy soon felt earth underneath her paws again. "What, you weren't going to heroically dive in to pull me out yourself?" she asked mockingly.

"Not my style. You know that by now." Nick's smile faded as he looked her up and down. "You sure you're alright?"

Judy scoffed. "I'm fine, you big baby. Just wet. And very, very cold." She shifted a little in her drenched uniform. "Let's, uh... let's get this diamond to the museum, and then go home? Please?"

He slipped his sunglasses back on. "Sounds good, Carrots. You want to drive, or..." He gestured broadly to the twenty-five police cruisers on the street above them. "...will one of these do instead?"

* * *

Tai Lung reached the rooftop. He cast a disdainful look down at the street, now swarming with police. He could see the rabbit and the fox bringing the diamond away.

"This isn't over," he muttered to himself. He took off in a four-legged sprint.

On the next roof over, Sly watched him from the shadows. He smiled.

"You got that right."

* * *

[ _Howdy! Thanks for reading this far! I just wanted to make a quick note here. Some of you may have recognized tonight's antagonist. Some of you may not have. It's cool either way! I've filled the gaps in this story by borrowing characters from elsewhere. I'll be trying to write them in-character, but also so that prior knowledge isn't necessary. This is primarily Zootopia, then Sly Cooper, then the villains, and finally there's a handful of minor characters you might or might not know. Hopefully you'll enjoy it either way. 'Til next time!_ ]


	2. Clods and Curators

[ _Hello again! A quick clarification to answer some questions I've been getting: the non-Zootopia characters in this story aren't their literal, canon selves. They're (essentially) identical people who exist within the Zootopia universe. So Tai Lung, for instance, doesn't hail from ancient China, because a) it's modern day, and b) "China", strictly speaking, might not even exist here. There's no dimension-hopping shenanigans going on. Instead, I tweaked backstories – sorta like adapting a comic book into a film. It'll become clearer as we move on. Hope that helps!_ ]

* * *

"Yeah, guys? If I were you I'd turn around right now."

Sly sprinted from rooftop to rooftop, his voice calm and even despite the exertion. He was used to multitasking like this. "Things with the diamond... didn't go great. Every cop in the city is out there now."

"Copy that, Sly!" Murray said over the comms. "I'll park the van somewhere quiet, and me and Bentley will go back to the hideout once they've gone by."

"But what are _you_ doing?" asked Bentley. "Shouldn't you be heading back as well?"

Sly's eyes were focused. Through the darkness, he could see a burly figure up ahead, jumping through the city with precise, powerful movements.

Tai Lung.

"The guy who beat us to the diamond... whoever he is, he's tough, and he means business," said Sly. "I'm not letting him slip away. He's gonna lead me right back to his own hideout."

Bentley sighed. "And if this guy's so dangerous, why doesn't it occur to you that tailing him might get you killed? Did you take one too many blows to the head?"

Sly ran across a telephone wire above a busy street – it barely bent under his weight. "I seem to be doing fine, pal. I'm just not a fan of this guy's attitude. He's a real menace to nice young policewomen."

" _There_ it is," said Bentley flatly. "Mystery solved. There's a policewoman."

"Hey, we may be thieves, but we're still guests in this city," said Sly. "And I for one am not about to let some shirtless maniac endanger something as priceless and beautiful as-"

"The policewoman?" Murray asked.

"I was going to say the Nope Diamond." Sly watched Tai Lung's movements warily. He was getting a little too close to him. "Listen, I'll be in touch when I have something. Talk soon."

Tai Lung landed heavily on a rooftop. He picked out muffled, startled yells from directly below him – apartment building. It didn't matter. They were insects.

But now that he was actively focusing on his hearing, he noticed something else. It was almost imperceptible in the fevered soundscape of the city. But it was there.

He jogged toward the edge of the roof, acting as though he hadn't heard it. Then, as he jumped over the street to the next line of roofs, he twisted in mid-air suddenly. His eyes darted around, trying to catch the source of the noise by surprise.

He saw nothing behind him. He landed easily, nonchalantly, despite facing the wrong direction. He stood there for a few moments, being thorough. But nothing moved. The rooftops were deserted.

He shook his head and then set off again.

Sly climbed back up to the height of the rooftops, having spent the last few seconds comfortably perched on a drainpipe out of view. He smiled as he watched Tai Lung jump away.

" _You're pretty good... but you're no Cooper_."

* * *

Nick pulled up to the museum. The bundle of wet towels on the passenger seat turned towards him and gave him a bright smile.

"See? Everything's fine!"

"Let's just get the diamond inside, alright?" Nick pulled a towel off of Judy's face to better see her. "The more time we waste, the more likely it is you'll get a cold or something."

Judy laughed. "You sound like my mom!"

"And _you_ sound like my twin brother Alfonso who tragically died after he fell into a river and got Super-Pneumonia."

Judy shook off the rest of her towels, holding the Nope Diamond in the crook of her arm. "Why do you have to express your concern through outrageous lies?"

"The value of a cautionary tale lies not in its truthfulness, but the well-intentioned terror it evokes."

"Uh huh."

They stepped out, taking a moment to survey the battalion of police cars that had followed them. Some officers had gone back to their previous duties once Tai Lung and Sly had both fled, but many hadn't. No more risks.

The curator was standing on the museum's front steps – a leopard with entirely black fur and intelligent yellow eyes. He was tall and powerfully built, especially considering his famously soft-spoken nature. He was smartly dressed, his dark purple shirt even having gold cufflinks.

He strode toward them, his arms folded behind his back. "Good evening, officers." His voice was deep, and he had a rich accent. He took a look around at the sea of white and black metal flooding his parking lot, then glanced back to the still wet Judy. "...I take it there were... complications."

"Nothing we couldn't handle, sir!" said Judy, giving him a salute with her free hand. Then she carefully offered him the diamond. "We have it right here, Mr Okonkwo."

"Ah! Excellent." He knelt down to her level and took it from her delicately. He took a moment to examine it in the gleaming light of the streetlamps before realizing something. "What happened to the containment unit I bought for it?"

"Uh," said Nick, "it's... pretty broken."

"Of course," said Okonkwo flatly. "At least _that_ was insured..." He stood to his full height, cradling the diamond in both paws. "Please, come inside."

Nick and Judy followed him through the museum's doors, passing by two wolf guards standing stiffly to attention. "If you don't mind me asking, how'd you pay for all this new security?" asked Nick. "I thought the museum only had whatever scraps City Hall threw to it."

"Our municipal funding has seen an increase thanks to the new exhibit," said Okonkwo. "Mostly, however, I financed things through a public donation fund. Hosting this gem is a huge honour, but also a burden. I hoped our patrons would understand that, and I'm happy to report their generosity has astounded me. Not only that, the diamond has also become something of an issue in the upcoming elections for mayor. Every candidate made a show of donating to the museum." Okonkwo smiled. "Certainly a fortunate development from my perspective."

Judy nudged Nick and pointed down to the diorama of prehistoric times built into the lobby's floor. "Hey, look. That's where we almost died that one time."

"Ah," said Nick. "Precious memories."

Okonkwo cleared his throat awkwardly. "Yes... I'm truly sorry for what happened to you here."

Nick shrugged. "It's not like it was your fault."

"Besides," said Judy brightly, "we can say that about at least four other places in the city. And that's just counting when Nick and I nearly died at the same time!"

Okonkwo looked over his shoulder to give Judy a concerned look. "... Even still."

" _Any_ way," said Nick with an odd emphasis, "what you're saying is that the diamond is safe here?"

"Absolutely. Between the guards and the alarm systems, I am quietly confident of the gem's security."

Okonkwo handed the diamond off to one of two wolves stationed at the main staircase. "Take this up to Doctor Solus, will you? Make sure he gets to look it over before it goes into containment."

"Yes, sir."

Judy watched the wolves head upstairs. "There's still academic staff working? It's pretty late."

"The work ethic of a hamster on coffee is... hard to match." Okonkwo gave both officers a wide smile. "I cannot thank you enough for what you've done for my museum tonight."

"Oh, there's no need for that," said Judy, "we're just doing our jobs." She gave a modest wave of her hand, dislodging a fleck of water from her paw onto Okonkwo's trousers.

"Carrots, you're tracking water onto the nice man's floor. From the _river_ you fell into. You can at least let him thank you!" Nick turned to Okonkwo, laying a hand on his own chest and lowering his sunglasses dramatically. "Now personally, I was kicked into a wall. And I don't feel bad telling you about it. Have you ever been kicked into a wall, Mr Okonkwo?"

He smiled wryly. "Not recently."

"Well, either way, I'm sure you can appreciate it's not exactly pleasant."

"Very true." Okonkwo produced two pieces of paper from his shirt pocket. "So, with that in mind, I'd like to extend an invitation to the two of you. On Friday night there's a private party to officially open the exhibit. I'd love to see both of you there. 7pm, black tie. Although I'm sure dress uniform would do nicely."

Judy took her envelope more hesitantly than Nick did. "Oh, Mr Okonkwo... you don't..."

He held up a hand. "Please. If nothing else, consider it recompense for your unfortunate experience here."

"C'mon, Carrots," said Nick, elbowing her eagerly. "It'd be fun to rub shoulders with 'Zootopia's Finest'."

Okonkwo laughed quietly. "You two _are_ Zootopia's Finest."

* * *

It took some doing, but Sly succeeded in shadowing Tai Lung back to a web of alleyways in a shadier region of District One. When the leopard aimed towards an abandoned warehouse, Sly had a feeling they'd arrived.

Three dark grey hyenas were loitering outside the warehouse. Sly wasn't the kind of guy to use words like 'loitering' to describe how people stood around, but there was no denying it. They were slouched against the wall, wearing dark denim jackets and faded trousers. Two of them were muttering into cigarettes while a third stared blankly at nothing.

They were definitely loitering.

Tai Lung landed in the alleyway, next to a trio of dark green motorcycles; it seemed like the hyenas were some kind of minor biker gang. At his arrival, the centre hyena – the only woman, and presumably the leader – strode toward him angrily.

"'Bout time you – hey, what gives? Aren't you supposed to have the thing?!"

Tai Lung shouldered past her. "Get out of my way, you wretch." He stalked inside the warehouse.

The second hyena watched him go. "D'you think something went wrong, Shenzi?"

She huffed a strand of her black hair out of her face. "Oh, _jeez_ , Banzai. Just _maybe_." She followed Tai Lung inside, Banzai trailing after her. The third hyena kept staring into space. He hadn't noticed them leave.

Sly pressed a finger to his ear. "I've found it. Bentley, you have my GPS location?"

"Triangulating it now."

"Good. I'm going inside to find out a little more."

"You want us to come pick you up?" asked Murray.

"Maybe later. I'll call if I need you. Sly out. _"_

There weren't any ropes or the like leading from Sly's rooftop to the warehouse, so he was forced to approach on ground level. He crept past the third hyena's back – not exactly his most impressive achievement in the art of stealth – and climbed a rusty pipe to the roof, letting himself in through a dirty window.

Tai Lung's voice was clear. "Just get a hold of him! I need to inform him of what happened."

From his position on a steel beam, Sly squinted down at the warehouse floor. As well as Tai Lung and the two hyenas, there was someone else: a yellow lynx, short and youngish with tall, pointed ears. She wore a bright green jumpsuit and a visor in a similar colour. It didn't quite obscure the bags under her eyes. She was frowning uncertainly.

"We were only supposed to contact him as a last resort." Her voice was nasal, and surprisingly loud for her small frame. " _Team nerd_ ," Sly identified with confidence.

"Well, consider this an _emergency_! Just **do it!** "

The lynx backed up defensively. "Okay! Okay. Give me a second."

She went to get something. Sly took the opportunity to reach into the red pack strapped to his leg and produce his Binocucom – which, as it sounded, was a computerized pair of binoculars. He didn't need the magnification to make out the people below him, but the dark blue device had a high-definition camera built into it. He took a few photos of Tai Lung, the hyenas, and the lynx.

She was tinkering with something on a table in the middle of the empty warehouse. It looked like a cellphone wired into an old speaker. She stepped back, wringing her paws nervously.

The phone clicked, and a voice came in, impossibly deep and tinged with an electronic edge. Most likely a voice modulator, but Sly wasn't prepared to rule out a giant robot. " **What?** "

"We, um," said the lynx, "...that is-"

"He didn't get the thing!" yelled Shenzi.

The caller paused. " **Tai Lung? Care to explain?** "

"There were complications," said Tai Lung roughly. "Everything was going to plan, until I was interrupted by some... raccoon. I could've handled it, except _then_ this rabbit police officer came in and stole the dia-" He cast a disdainful glance to the hyenas. "...stole _it_ back. Then the entire police department arrived. I had to leave."

" **Judy Hopps...? Hmm.** " There was an odd electric crackle as the caller took a breath. " **Now, Tai Lung. We all had our roles. Peridot succeeded in delaying the convoy, I assume?** "

"I did! Hacking into the traffic system was even easier than anticipated," said the lynx, with the restrained smugness of someone angling for Employee of the Month.

" **And it was _your_ job to extract the package.** " Even through the modulator, the dangerous shift in the caller's tone was evident. " **You _assured_ me that you could do it alone.** "

"And I did!" Tai Lung practically yelled. "Until unknown elements came in from nowhere! So maybe I wasn't the one failing my role, maybe it was _you_!"

Peridot gasped and the hyenas shared a look. " **Excuse me?! This is your failing, not mine! My planning -** "

Tai Lung growled. "What? Do you honestly think your trio of idiots could have possibly handled things better?!"

"Well, he's got a point there," said Banzai placidly. Shenzi punched him on the arm.

" **Silence! Silence, all of you! I will not tolerate this insubordination!** "

Sly always enjoyed watching other teams fall apart – there was a certain catharsis to it. He didn't notice that the third hyena had wandered back inside. He poked Banzai on the arm.

"Huh? What is it, Ed?"

Ed pointed calmly, silently, to the roof. Banzai looked up and saw Sly. "Holy crap, there's a guy up there! Shenzi, there's a guy!"

Shenzi, Tai Lung and Peridot whirled around, the latter yelping upon seeing Sly. "The site's been compromised!"

" **What?!** " The voice on the other end of the phone cut the connection immediately.

Tai Lung's eyes narrowed. "You!"

"Sorry, gotta run!" Sly ran for the window and ducked through it. He grabbed the pipe and slid down to ground level and ran for the next roof over and suddenly a wall of snow leopard slammed into him.

Sly landed heavily on the cold earth. He only had a second to recover before Tai Lung pinned him to the ground with one hand. "You irritating little...!"

Sly forced himself to smile. "I'm actually quite the charmer once you get to know me."

Tai Lung hissed and went to punch him. There was no room to dodge.

Then Tai Lung got hit by a van.

He skidded along the ground and crashed against a metal dumpster. He left a dent in it.

Sly crawled to the van's passenger side. He opened the door, and sure enough, Murray was in the driver's seat. His light blue shirt was slightly too short for his large frame, leaving some of his round pink stomach visible. The hippo watched Tai Lung's body with concern through the goggles of his red mask.

"Oh, jeez," he said. "Is he okay?"

Tai Lung leapt to his feet suddenly, cold fury in his eyes.

"Oh," said Murray. "Guess so."

Sly slammed the door shut. "Punch it!"

With a squeal of rubber, the Cooper's Gang van pulled a tight turn and sped back the way it came, flying down the alleyway dangerously. It was followed by the hyenas, who had taken to their motorcycles with loud laughter. Tai Lung watched them leave, the light reflecting ominously off his eyes.

"Looks like we've still got company!" said Murray. "Wanna get these suckers off our back, Bentley?"

"Gladly!" Bentley opened the van's back door, giving him a view of the hyenas. He pressed a button on his large silver wheelchair, and an arm extended from its side, levelling a mechanized crossbow against his glasses.

"Steady... steady..." He aimed his crosshair at Shenzi's front wheel – she was in the centre, and slightly ahead of Ed and Banzai. He suddenly loosed a dart. It landed with a loud bang, rupturing the rubber of the tyre. Shenzi yelled and swerved erratically, knocking Banzai into a pile of garbage before falling against Ed's bike.

The Cooper Gang could just about make out the hyenas getting to their feet and gesturing wildly as they sped away. Then the darkness swallowed them, and the gang was away.

Sly sank into the passenger seat as Bentley shut the door. "Nice going. How'd you guys get here so fast, anyway?"

Bentley adjusted his thick, opaque spectacles. "Full disclosure – we headed over as soon as we'd located you. We figured something like this was going to happen."

"Just one of those nights, y'know?" added Murray. "One of those, 'Sly might get himself killed 'cause he met a lady' nights..."

"I'd take offence to that, but I guess I _did_ get caught..." Sly yawned despite himself. "It has been a long night. Let's regroup at the shop. We have a lot to do tomorrow. After all," he added, "we haven't stolen that diamond yet, have we?"

Bentley sighed. "I'll prepare a slideshow."

* * *

[ _Here's some trivia for you: panthers don't exist. "Panthers" are technically mythical creatures from medieval Europe. "Black panthers" are, depending on whether it's South America or Africa, jaguars (like Mr. Manchas) or leopards who are born melanistic. There is no such actual thing as a "panther". Weird, huh?  
And in case anybody's wondering: Mr. Big's house, Mr. Manchas' house (twice in a row!), Cliffside, and the rail tracks just outside the museum. Zootopia's my kinda Disney movie, though I'm sure other protagonists have similarly dangerous track records. Til next time!_]


	3. In Brief

" _Good morning, Zootopia! This is Fabienne Growley, with the Morning Report."_

 _"I'm Peter Moosebridge, a very good morning."_

 _"Our top story: despite dramatic scenes last night, the Nope Diamond was successfully delivered to the Zootopia Natural History Museum. The ZPD has yet to release a statement regarding the individuals who attempted to steal the diamond. However, eyewitness reports indicate that more than one thief made an attempt on the diamond simultaneously, allowing for the ZPD to capitalize on the disorder and regain control of the situation."_

 _"The Nope Diamond, named for its discoverer Doctor Emily Nope, is believed to be the world's largest gemstone. The diamond was discovered by a geological team consisting of multiple species of both predators and prey, and has taken on symbolic significance for many in the city in light of events earlier this year."_

 _"T'Challa Okonkwo, the curator of the Natural History Museum, has assured this program that the diamond is completely safe and the scheduling of its exhibition will proceed as planned. The exhibit will officially open on Friday night at a private ceremony, and will be open to the public from Saturday morning onwards, free of charge."_

 _"In other news, the elections to replace Interim Mayor Dewey began in earnest this week. The shocking arrests of not only Leodore Lionheart but also Dawn Bellweather have had a clear and visceral impact on the city's political landscape. A total of thirty-two candidates have officially entered the race, standing on a number of platforms. It's currently impossible to determine who among them has a chance of pulling ahead, since early polls suggest a vast lead for pop singer Gazelle – despite the star's repeated insistence she is not actually running."_

 _"The people want what they want, Peter."_

 _"Apparently so, Fabienne. Apparently so."_

* * *

The morning light shone through the glass front doors of the Zootopia Police Department Headquarters. Two short but proud figures emerged through the golden shine, alert and ready despite the early hour. They knew their place and their value; they'd proven themselves to the department, and by now they had earned more than just the respect of their fellow officers. They were exemplars, heroes; almost legends.

Judy sneezed.

Nick had burst out laughing the first time she'd done it – she hopped a little every time, despite herself – but by now the novelty had worn off. "Are you _sure_ you're -"

"I'm fine! Jeez." Judy rubbed at her nose with a tissue. "Nothing to worry about, Grandma."

"Super-Pneumonia~..." Nick muttered under his breath.

As they approached the front desk, Clawhauser looked up from the paperwork he was half-heartedly pawing at. The cheetah's face lit up. "Well if it isn't my favourite dynamic duo! How are you guys doing?"

"Morning, Clawhauser!" Judy smiled. "We're both just great."

"Allegedly," coughed Nick.

Judy chuckled. "Nick's a little worried for me after I fell into a river last night."

Clawhauser sat forward, his eyes wide. "Oh my goodness, you did? You actually did? I mean, that's what some of the guys were saying, but -"

"Oh, she did," said Nick. "And I _actually_ got kicked into a wall. It was a rough night."

"Nothing we couldn't handle," said Judy proudly.

"Dangerous, really."

"Another day serving the city!"

"There was some kind of... kung fu murderer."

"And a guy in a domino mask!" laughed Judy. "Can you believe that? Like an old-school cartoon."

"But mostly a kung fu murderer."

"Wow, you guys see all the action," said Clawhauser. "I'd say I envy you, _buuuuut_ I'm pretty happy here at front desk, really. Gotta play to your strengths, y'know?" He glanced at his watch and started. "Oh goodness, I'd better stop distracting you! You two should head on to the bullpen right away. Bogo says that the briefing this morning is really important!"

"Yeah, I imagine it will be," said Judy.

"No kidding," said Nick. "I guess I'll have to stay awake through this one."

* * *

Sly woke to the sound of something loudly sizzling in the kitchen. He could smell fresh fish from downstairs.

Apparently breakfast was on.

He rolled out of bed and headed down. For "Operation: Slippery Nope", the gang had rented out an autoshop in Tundra Town. The owner was going on vacation anyway, and had been entirely fine with taking in lodgers on a no-questions-asked basis – once the sizeable check had cleared, of course.

Murray had insisted on the shop once they'd found it – he was fiercely protective of the team van, and always made it a priority to set up a hideout that could comfortably and safely house it. The actual living space was a bit on the small side and a little too cold, but Sly had known far worse.

He wandered into the kitchen with a stretch. "Morning, guys. What's cooking?"

"Mornin', Sly!" called Murray from the stove. "I found a great fish market just down the street. You want some salmon?"

"Sure thing! Thanks."

As Sly fixed himself breakfast – Murray had also bought some fresh bread – he glanced over to the other side of the room. Bentley had wired his laptop into the shop's TV, creating an informal setup for one of his digital presentations. "How was research, Bentley? Find what you need?"

"I did indeed. Those photos you took were a huge help. Now we know who we're dealing with." Bentley frowned. "Well, mostly."

"'Mostly' is definitely a good start." Sly sat at the table, laying his plate in front of him. Behind him, Murray looked over to the screen as well. Bentley cleared his throat.

"Alright, let's get -"

* * *

"- **started** then, shall we?" thundered Bogo as he stomped up to his podium.

The room went quiet as Bogo took his place, laying two file folders onto his desk. He took a moment to look around the room before speaking.

"I suppose I should start with some well-earned congratulations. To everyone from the convoy team here this morning, for showing up despite various injuries – I have word Wolford needed the day off, but will be with us shortly... to every officer who responded so promptly to the call for backup, and of course, to Officers Hopps and Wilde for their excellent work in reclaiming the diamond. Well done, all of you.

"As police officers, we can't prevent every crime before it happens. But it's our job – our duty - to get a handle on things once something _does_ , inevitably, go wrong. Last night, you succeeded in doing that. You should all be proud. I am." By now, Bogo was giving the officers a quiet smile. "I have half a mind to give you all the week off." He let the statement hang in the air, just long enough for some of the more optimistic officers to almost believe it, before his face darkened. "Or I would, if I was a sentimental _idiot_ who was completely divorced from reality. Eyes forward, people, we are far from done!"

"Had me worried for a second there," Nick muttered to Judy.

"While last night's work was exemplary, you all made one very big mistake. Clearly, not enough of you broke away to chase the perps – or maybe you did, and just botched it. Either way, nobody's being held for what happened last night. Normally, I wouldn't tolerate a mistake like this, but..." Bogo sighed. "Considering just _who_ our two missing criminals are, I can hardly be that upset."

He lifted one of the files. "Let's start with the shirtless punk who gave some of you new bruises, shall we?" Bogo opened the folder and read from it with his usual focused anger.

"'Tai Lung'. Full name: Unknown. Species: Snow Leopard. Address: Unknown. Place of birth: Unknown. Employment status: _Unknown_. Wanted on multiple counts of assault, breaking and entering, and destruction of property. Highly dangerous. Approach with extreme caution." He lowered the file and looked around the room. "You know how many times this degenerate has been arrested?"

"Uh," said Fangmeyer, "tweeeelve?"

"Two hundred, or something?" guessed Francine.

"Zero," said Nick with a calm confidence.

" _O_ _nce_!" snapped Bogo.

"Goddammit," muttered Nick.

"Records are patchy, but we do know he served time after pleading guilty to a manslaughter case years ago. But since then, he's reached myth status among law enforcement agencies worldwide. Even if you manage to corner him somewhere – which damn near impossible, let me tell you – he'll just plough through whoever you've sent to detain him." Bogo slapped the file back on to his desk. "His movements these past few years were erratic. He'd only show up once in a while and then melt back into the shadows. Frankly, we were hoping he'd stick to doing that. If he's finally joined some gang... that is not good news. I cannot stress this enough, people! This man is -"

* * *

"- a real jerk. I know!" said Sly. "I was the one getting tossed around by him, after all."

"I'm just saying, Sly. I can't stress this enough! In a straight fight, not even Murray is a match for him. We can't afford to take any chances."

Sly took another bite of bread. "Well, what about his lynx friend? She doesn't look that tough."

"Ah, her," said Bentley. "I had a feeling she was familiar, and once I looked her up I proved myself right! She's Dorothy Perrault, better known by her online handle of 'Peridot'. She's a pretty skilled hacker, with a background in electrical engineering. She's been arrested once or twice for minor infractions, but she's actually quite orderly and compliant to authority. Her records indicate she's a model prisoner."

"Sounds a little odd for a criminal," noted Sly.

"She's also incredibly neurotic and has a hair-trigger temper."

"Ah," said Sly. "That's more like it."

"The presence of a hostile hacker is very bad news for us, I'm afraid. My standard procedures only assume pre-existing firewalls. Another hacker going after the same target is a massive unknown variable - and potentially a _huge_ headache."

"So, in summary," said Sly, "we've got a dangerous kung fu master, a hacker who could mess up any tech plans we make, and a mastermind we can't even find."

"I admit, it does sound serious... but here we reach the comparatively good news. This team definitely has a weak link." Bentley changed the screen to a picture of the hyenas. "These guys are... not exactly what I'd call a 'threat'. I'd say they're 'dumb muscle', but they don't even seem to be that useful in a fight."

"So just dumb, then," offered Murray.

"Basically. They're local _flavour_. Shenzi's the woman, and the other two – Banzai and Ed – they answer to her. They do odd jobs, legal or otherwise. I'm not even sure what they were supposed to contribute last night, but they're definitely part of the operation."

"Right, right..." Sly frowned uncertainly. "And you couldn't dig up anything on the one behind all this?"

"I'm afraid not. Whoever they are, they're going to great lengths to protect their identity. Right now, they're too well hidden." Bentley smiled. "But I do have an idea of where we can start."

"I'm all ears."

"The thing is, Tai Lung and Peridot are both from out of town – and some distance out of town, at that. They seem to be specialists hired in for this job. But the hyenas already lived in Zootopia. Even if they were hired _because_ they were local, I imagine better candidates are available. It's a bit of a longshot, I admit, but I have my suspicions that these three could have some kind of link to our mystery mastermind. I think shaking them down for info is our next move."

"Hardly," said Sly. "We've got a heist to plan. You're the one who said the museum was practically a fortress – we need to focus our efforts on that if we want the diamond."

Bentley's brow furrowed. "What? We still have an enemy team to deal with – and a dangerous one, at that! I wouldn't feel comfortable trying to go for the Nope Diamond with them still in the picture. They're too much of a risk!"

"Yeah, Sly," added Murray. "What are we going to do about them?"

"Oh, we'll probably do something about them eventually. But the way I see it, right now, they're not _our_ problem." Sly smiled. "What about -"

* * *

"- the other thief, sir?" asked Judy. "Is there any intel on him?"

"Plenty," drawled Bogo. "Rather the opposite from Mr Tai Lung."

He opened the file – it was considerably heftier than the other one. Bogo was only reading from the first page.

"Sly Cooper, raccoon. Wanted internationally for millions of dollars worth of property theft. Usually steals from other criminals, but has been known to break that pattern for anything he considers to be suitably important or interesting – such as the Nope Diamond, for instance. He's been at this for years. Only notable break was fairly recently, when he dropped off the grid for a few months. Whatever that was, apparently it didn't last.

"Runs with what is narcissistically called 'The Cooper Gang', which consists of himself and two others. 'Murray', a hippo – driver and muscle. Not exactly the brightest, but very tough. 'Bentley', a turtle – smart one of the bunch. Hacker, engineer, strategist, that kind of thing. This is a man who illegally modified his own goddamn wheelchair. We can safely assume both of them are in the city as well."

Bogo gave the assembled officers a stern look. "Each of these men would be trouble by themselves. Together, they are a logistical _nightmare_. They've almost never been arrested, and when they have, they invariably escape custody later."

Nick stuck up his hand. "So, Chief, if these clowns are so hard to catch... what exactly do you expect us to do?"

Bogo huffed. "I'm not optimistic about catching the Cooper Gang, Wilde, but that doesn't mean I'm going to let them run rampant in my city. I expect you to be diligent, co-ordinated, and focused. I expect you to make life extremely hard for these, as you say, _clowns_. I _expect_ you to do your damn **job**! _Is that understood?_ "

" **Yes, sir!** " chorused the room.

"Good." Bogo cleared his throat. "But while we're on the subject... it won't _just_ be you. Cooper hasn't gotten this far without garnering a lot of attention from law enforcement, to the point that there is an Interpol inspector who basically specializes in his case... and, as it happens, that inspector will be joining us shortly. They'll be arriving in just a few hours, actually. As per ZPD protocol, one of you will be assigned as their liaison. I'd explain what that means, but only one of you needs to know, and I don't feel like wasting any more time." Bogo began to put away both files. "We've had some awkward experiences before with outside agents, but frankly it's always an asset to have -"

* * *

"More cops?" said Murray dubiously. "That seems like bad news to me. Why are you so interested in these two?"

Sly leaned forward in his chair, his elbows on the table. "I guess I'm feeling optimistic. What did you find, Bentley?"

"It wasn't exactly hard to find out about the officers you described. They're practically celebrities – or were a few months ago, at least."

Bentley's screen displayed a newspaper from earlier in the year, showing the rabbit and fox Sly had seen the night before. They were in full uniform on a stage somewhere. The camera had caught them both laughing, as though one of them had just cracked a joke. ' _ZPD WELCOMES FIRST FOX RECRUIT_ ', read the headline.

"On the left, Judy Hopps – a relatively recent recruit herself, and the department's first rabbit. Graduated top of her class, and as Sly can attest, she's no slouch in a fight. On the right, Nick Wilde – who, as you've no doubt put together yourselves, followed her soon after as the first fox. Unlike Judy, he's lived here his entire life, and he knows the city and everyone in it like few others. The two of them stopped a conspiracy which was causing massive political upheaval in Zootopia, after which Wilde joined the force as Hopps' partner. They've been working together ever since."

Sly smirked. "Sounds real inspiring."

"Social media certainly thought so," said Bentley dryly. "I have to admit, researching people who _don't_ live under a shroud of criminal secrecy was refreshing. So much easier than usual..."

"So, what are you thinking, Sly?" asked Murray.

Sly looked intently at Judy's smiling face, tapping his forefingers together thoughtfully.

"I'm thinking... I'm gonna need a phone and a printer."

* * *

The rest of the meeting had been business as usual, with Bogo briskly handing out daily assignments. Nick and Judy were walking back to their cruiser, ready to get started. There was a noticeable spring in Judy's step – moreso than usual, that is.

"So, what do you think about this Interpol agent? Exciting, huh?"

Nick scoffed. "Hardly. You're way too easily impressed, Carrots – he's not even here yet! Try not to be too disappointed when it's just some big brawny guy who immediately picks McHorn as his liaison so they can kick down doors at double capacity."

Judy raised an eyebrow. "And when exactly did Bogo specify the inspector was a 'guy'?"

Nick raised a hand defensively. "Educated guess, is all."

"Uh huh." Judy's phone buzzed in her back pocket. She took it out, confused. "Who's texting me at this hour...?"

"Who texts you at all?" asked Nick, earning him a elbow in his side from Judy.

The message was from a blocked number.

 _Locksley Park, 1pm. If that suits your lunchbreak. Be a pal and come alone. Hope to see you_.

"Huh," said Judy.

Nick didn't look down. "What is it?"

"Mysterious text almost certainly from a master criminal who may or may not want to kill me," said Judy calmly. She glanced up to Nick. "Wanna come with?"

Nick shrugged. "Cool. Sure."


	4. Synergetic Aesthetic

Locksley Park was pleasant this time of year. It was a medium-sized park quite close by to ZPD Headquarters – which didn't seem like an accident. Judy thought it was odd for a thief to want to meet so close to the epicentre of all police activity in the city. Apparently he was the accommodating type. Either way, she was on guard.

A part of her wasn't even sure why she'd come. Surely the correct thing to do would be to tell Chief Bogo and arrange things so that every second person wandering casually through the park was a plain-clothes ZPD officer.

But she hadn't.

Instead, she had – at first, without even thinking about it – decided to meet a master thief, in public, at his suggestion. Judy might've chalked it up to her 'police instincts', or something, except once she considered that, it sounded pretty arrogant. Then she realized that, even if she did alert the department, Sly had doubtlessly planned for that and would escape anyway; but that didn't change the fact that alerting the department was still the right thing to do. By all accounts, she should have. Not because she might need back-up, just because they had a right to know.

Judy was confident that the only back-up she needed was sitting right next to her.

Since they had arrived before 1pm, Nick had bought a copy of the Zootopia Inquirer on their way in. They were killing time with the paper's page of colour photographs of all 32 mayoral candidates.

"'Frederick F. Fazbear Junior'," Judy read aloud dubiously. "'Successful business owner and entrepreneur.'"

Nick scoffed. "' _Entrepreneur_ '. You ran a pizzeria with a minimum of child deaths, Freddy, don't get delusions of grandeur." He raised an eyebrow at an elderly tortoise with rounded glasses. "Oh, come on! Tortimer? Really?"

"What? Who is that?"

"That's the old mayor – emphasis on _oooold_ ," said Nick. "He was in office ages ago. Apparently he thinks a third term is on the cards."  
  
Judy noticed a white goat with a quiet smile. The caption read _Toriel Dreemurr_. "And who's this?"

"Ah, old Tori," said Nick knowledgeably. "If anybody has a shot, it's her."

Judy examined the picture. "She reminds me of my mom."

"That's her Special Power," Nick said darkly. "She reminds everybody of their mom. I already know that if I don't vote for her, she won't be angry. Just disappointed."

"Well, she seems nice," said Judy. "And I think she'll probably do better than the other goat here... 'Mr G. Beff... Biffle... Buuuh...'"

"Bufufftlefumpter," Nick said smoothly. He pointed to the picture of the wizened brown goat. "Fun fact about Gompers – he's run in every election in this city for the last _thirty years_. Never won anything, but that's not about to stop him. Inspiring, really."

Judy chuckled. Then her eyes landed on a picture near the bottom: a thin lion with a black mane and dark orange fur. His irises were a deep green, and a scar ran down his left eye. His image met Judy's gaze with a confident smirk.

"Woah. Who's this guy?"

"You don't know? That's Scar."

"Wow, Nick. Really? 'Scar'?" Judy shook her head. "I guess not all of your jokes can be winners."

Nick coughed, then pointed at the name printed under the photo. Judy squinted at it.

 _Scar Kifalme_.

"No," said Judy.

"Come on, Carrots," said Nick, who clearly enjoying this. "I thought that in Zootopia, anybody can be named whatever they want!"

"I hate when you use that line," Judy muttered.

"Granted, it doesn't say 'Scar' on his birthcert, but that's what everybody calls him," continued Nick. "Evidently, including the press. He's, uh... an interesting guy."

"You know him?" Judy rolled her eyes at Nick's mock indignant expression. "Right, right. You know _everyone_. Well, what's he like?"

"He's... I guess what you'd call a socialite. He has a degree in law, but apparently he only went to college as something to _do_ , since he just kinda lounges around. His family's real old money, so he can afford not to work. Must be nice," muttered Nick.

Judy examined the lion's picture thoroughly. "He's creepy," she declared finally.

"If he seems creepy, that's only because he is," said Nick. "He has a certain... oily charm, I suppose. But I don't think he's going to poll well. He's too..."

"Evil-looking?"

"Something like that."

Suddenly, Nick's walkie-talkie crackled to life. "Uh, Nick? Come in, Nick?"

Nick glanced uncertainly to Judy before answering. "I'm here, Clawhauser. What?"

"Nick, I'm real sorry, but the Chief wants to see you in his office."

"Alright."

"... Um, now."

Nick blinked. "What, really? I'm on my lunch break, here!"

"I know! And _you_ know I'd never get in between someone and their food unless I had to! I mean it, Nick, he's really serious!"

" _Dammit_... Fine, fine! I'll be right there." Nick clicked his walkie-talkie back onto his belt. "Of all the...! Sorry."

Judy laughed. "Don't sweat it. I'd be more worried about what Bogo wants from you."

"Don't add to my stress levels, Carrots. More than you already do, I mean. Which is a _lot_." His joking smile faded awkwardly. "You going to be alright by yourself?"

"It's broad daylight in a public park right next to headquarters. I think I'll survive."

"Right, right..." Nick stood, leaving Judy holding a newspaper printed for an animal considerably larger than a rabbit. "Well, if you _do_ start to die, don't hesitate to scream. I'm sure somebody will hear. Maybe Clawhauser will rush out to rescue you."

"Better Clawhauser than you, ya dumb fox," grinned Judy. "Now go, before Bogo gets even angrier than he already definitely is."

"Good point. Back as soon as I can!"

Nick ran back toward the headquarters. Judy shook out the newspaper and turned her attention back to the photographs, trying to avoid glancing at Scar's unnerving gaze.

After a time, someone strolled up and sat on the same bench, roughly where Nick had been. Judy didn't look up, but she could tell he was slouched comfortably, clearly at ease.

There was silence for a while. When he spoke, Judy recognized his pleasant voice immediately. Not that his identity was a major revelation.

"So... was that your partner I nearly bumped into just there?"

"Yep," said Judy calmly. She still didn't look up. "We do pretty much everything together on the job. He was called away, but he'll be right back. That's not a problem, right?" Judy feigned a gasp. "Oh shucks, that's right! You said to come alone! How could I have been so stupid?" She finally turned away from the paper. "Oh gee, I sure hope you don't think I'm bad at going behind my department's back to meet with a known thief!"

Sly had changed outfits since last night – apparently this was what he considered a disguise. He was wearing a blue parka, his hands in its pockets, and he had also thrown on a pair of sunglasses. Without his cap, Judy could see the tuft of grey fur on his head. Messy. Deliberately so, probably.

She was expecting him to be at least slightly irritated. Instead, he smirked. "Not at all. You're doing just fine."

Judy frowned.

"Aren't you upset I ignored your only instruction?"

"It was more of a suggestion," said Sly. "My exact words were ' _be a pal and come alone_ '. If you came alone, then clearly you'd be alright with the two of us being pals. But as... eager as I am to get to know you personally, I don't need a 'pal' right now. What I need is a good cop – and that's you, with or without your partner."

Judy raised an eyebrow, but then returned his smug smirk. "Ah, the old 'I was just testing you' defence. Haven't heard that since second grade."

"I had a feeling I'd like you."

"I'm sure. So, Mr Cooper – what exactly is stopping me from letting every other cop in the city know where you are?"

Sly rubbed his chin thoughtfully. "Well, aside from my sparkling wit and magnetic charisma -"

" _Aside_ from the fact that you wouldn't have set up this meeting without having some kind of cowardly escape plan."

"I'd use a word like 'daring' instead of 'cowardly', but yeah, that too. Good to see you can keep up, not that I'm surprised. Aside from all that, it would be these." Sly produced a set of photographs from his pocket with a theatrical flick of his wrist.

Judy laid aside the newspaper and took them from him. She recognized Tai Lung, but the others were unfamiliar. "Is this what I think it is?"

"If you think it's me offering to help you catch these punks – since neither my gang nor your department has particularly good odds of stopping them alone, and because I obviously have a vested interest in seeing them taken down – then yes. Yes it is."

"What? You expect me to trust you, just like that?"

"Well, no. There's no reason at all for you to trust me, especially off the bat. But even through we're on opposite sides of the law, we still have a common goal."

"That's all we have in common, Cooper," said Judy solidly. "And I'm warning you right now: you better not be trying to double-cross me."

Sly held up his hands. "Not that you'd believe me when I say it, but I'm not. This is a genuine offer."

"It better be. Because if you know me, then you know my history, you know my accomplishments, and you know what I'm willing to do for this city. Nothing stands between me and justice. I," said declared, jabbing a finger at Sly, "am the most dangerous cop in all of Zootopia."

Then she sneezed, bouncing off the bench.

Sly coughed into his fist, but couldn't quite obscure his grin.

"Not. A. Word," said Judy fiercely.

"Oh, I wasn't..."

" _Notaword_."

* * *

Nick ran up the final flight of stairs to Chief Bogo's office and stopped outside the door. He leaned against the wall for a moment, panting slightly. He took a deep breath. Then he slouched his shoulders and casually strolled inside, one-liner at the ready.

"Look, Chief. If this is about that sandwich, I'll say it again – I didn't know!"

Nick stopped short when he noticed someone sitting in front of Bogo's desk. As he entered, she stood to greet him.

She was tall for a fox – taller than Nick, at any rate. She had hard brown eyes and dark blue hair, which – like her similarly-coloured top and pants – contrasted sharply with her orange fur. A gleaming gold badge was pinned to her bright yellow jacket. There was something red and boxy on her belt – Nick assumed it was some kind of red box. She spoke with a noticeable accent.

"Nicholas Wilde," she said, and a part of Nick fully expected the rest of the sentence to be ' _you are under arrest_ ', but instead she said "it's a pleasure to meet you."

Nick took her outstretched paw – she had a firm handshake. "Uh, hi. Likewise."

"Wilde," said Bogo, adjusting his reading glasses, "this is Interpol agent Inspector Carmelita Fox."

"Oh... oh!" Nick managed a smile. "It's great to meet you, Inspector. I, uh... had no idea you were a fox."

Carmelita smiled. "I'm guessing you hadn't heard my name until now."

"Uh, yeah, no." Nick blinked. "A fox Interpol agent, though! That's..."

"Oh, please. I'm not nearly as accomplished as the fox combat pilot."

Nick wasn't entirely sure whether or not she was joking.

He turned, uncertainly, to Bogo. "So, what exactly is this about?"

The chief gave Nick a rare smile. "... It seems you've arrived."

Bogo and Carmelita let Nick connect the dots by himself – he was a cop, after all. " _I'm_ your choice of liaison?"

"That you are, Officer Wilde," said Carmelita warmly. "If you're up for it, of course."

"Oh, well – I'm honoured, definitely! And I'd be happy to help you anyway I can..." Nick scratched his face sheepishly. "It's just that I thought you'd choose someone a little more... that is, an officer with better established, um, combat experience."

Carmelita raised an eyebrow. "What are you implying, Wilde? That I'm incapable of handling myself in a fight?"

"That's not – I didn't -!"

Carmelita laughed. "Take it easy, I'm just kidding. Though I assure you I _am_ more than able to hold my own. No, what I need out of a liaison is someone who knows this city, and knows it well. I'm not familiar with Zootopia, but crucially, neither is Sly." She coughed. "That is to say... Cooper. I need every advantage I can take, and this is a very important one – one that, according to your file, you'd be the best at providing."

"You did make a point of your knowledge of the city in your application," noted Bogo.

"I, uh, sure did," laughed Nick, "'cause that's one of the only things I'm good for... haha..."

"Well then," said Carmelita. "Do you accept the position?"

"Well, see, the thing is," said Nick quickly. And then stopped. And then added, "It's just that, as you've probably read – on my file – I'm relatively new to the whole... cop... thing."

"I'm aware," said Carmelita. "I decided your short service record wasn't that much of a concern. Besides, you've shown remarkable potential both in the academy and your work since joining the force."

"Thanks, really, but..." Nick cleared his throat. "Well, I've tended to work – actually, I've _only_ worked in partnership with Officer Judy Hopps. Did you, uh, read her file too?"

"I read everyone's file. It was a long flight," said Carmelita morosely. "What's your point?"

"Well, I'd just – as eager as I am to help you in your investigation – I think that I might be better... _oriented_ if Ju- if Officer Hopps was, um, also liaison. Or something."

Carmelita didn't reply immediately, and Nick had already started to internally panic when she nodded. "Yes, I'd be fine with that. I was deeply impressed with Hopps's record – honestly, she'd be my second choice."

"Perfect!" Nick turned to Bogo. "So, is that possible? Can two officers be liaison?"

"No," said Bogo firmly.

Nick faltered. He had been too focused on Carmelita – he hadn't noticed that Bogo's expression had darkened drastically. He was giving Nick an odd look. He was angry, but wasn't showing it in the usual way.

Nick was suddenly very afraid.

Bogo's attention was caught by Carmelita. "Well, that's unfortunate. Is that official protocol?"

"I'm afraid so. One ZPD officer per outside agent. That's what the book says." Bogo sighed heavily and rubbed his temples. " _But_... if I know Hopps, I have a sneaking suspicion that she will find the time to help your investigation – even if it's, say, unrecorded overtime. Which would be unsanctioned, unpaid, and potentially very dangerous. A terrible decision on her part. Of course," he rumbled, "one or two minor clerical errors – _if_ they were to happen – would make it difficult, if not impossible, to follow Hopps' actions with the strict bureaucracy which is standard at this department. Those errors would free Hopps up considerably, in fact – and may well go completely unnoticed, given that between Cooper and Tai Lung, we've entered a very busy period for the precinct. In any event, I will make it my business to ensure those errors _do_ _not_ occur." He looked to Nick. "Do I make myself clear?"

Nick smiled. "Crystal clear, sir. Thank you."

"For what?" snapped Bogo.

"Uh, nothing."

"Mmm-hmm."

Carmelita nodded to herself. "I'll defer to your judgement on that, Chief Bogo. Such a shame there's no way Hopps can officially join my investigation, but at least I can rest safe in the knowledge that bureaucracy in this department is... correctly handled." She stretched her arms. "Speaking of rest... I'm still quite jet-lagged from my flight. I should probably find my hotel."

"'Find your hotel'...?" said Nick. "You mean you came here first thing?"

"Naturally," said Carmelita. "I'm very dedicated to my job – I hope you're able to keep up." She gave him a wry smile. "I look forward to working with you, Nick."

"Um, likewise... Carmelita."

Carmelita exited, her tail swishing behind her. Nick waited for the door to click shut and for the sound of Carmelita's boots to gradually grow quieter before suddenly grabbing Bogo's desk. "Y-you knew, didn't you?!"

Bogo didn't look up from his paperwork. "I have no idea what you're talking about, Wilde."

"You knew that... she was a fox! That she was a _she_!"

"And you think I deliberately withheld that information until now?" Bogo smiled thinly, still looking down. "Please. I don't know why you'd think I'd do something so petty."

Nick's eyes narrowed. "This _is_ about the sandwich." Bogo made no reply, apparently engrossed in his work.

After a moment or two Nick cleared his throat. "I'd... better get back to Judy." He turned towards the door. "Thanks, Chief, and I'll -"

" _Wilde_. A word."

Nick stiffened and turned back slowly.

Bogo took off his reading glasses and laid them on his desk. "I've seen a lot of partnerships in my time," he said sombrely. "Various combinations of personalities, with various degrees of productivity and success. Which is what makes you and Hopps all the more impressive. Two officers as green as you two, accomplishing so much together."

Nick relaxed. "Thank you, sir."

" _And_ ," said Bogo venomously, "I've _never_ seen an officer cling so desperately to another in all my years. Especially one that's barely a year his senior on the force."

"Sir – I – "

"'Sir you' **nothing** , Wilde! You cannot hide behind those big floppy ears forever! You are a fully-fledged police officer, and so is Hopps – not, as you may believe, your _mother_. I suggest you learn the difference immediately."

Nick shrank where he stood. Bogo sighed. "Look, Wilde. I wouldn't be telling you this if you didn't have the potential to be an excellent cop. Hopps thinks you do, and so do I. An officer of your short tenure even being considered as an Interpol liaison – let alone actually being the first choice... it's a huge achievement."

"I appreciate that, sir."

"No, you clearly _don't_ ," said Bogo. "If you did, I'd see more independence out of you. Initiative. Solo work. You have to think long-term. You need to consider your future as an officer. Hopps can't always be with you. She could get transferred, or worse – something could..."

"... Something could happen to her," said Nick softly.

"It's a dangerous job, Wilde, and we live in dangerous times. But I have confidence in Hopps. And you need to have confidence in _yourself_." Bogo put his glasses back on. "I've been meaning to get that straight with you for a while now. Something to bear in mind. Have you any questions?"

Nick hesitated. He considered his options – turning over Bogo's speech in his mind – before carefully choosing his words. Finally, he spoke.

"Is there really a fox combat pilot?"

* * *

"Yes, there is," said Judy firmly. "Just because _you_ can't think of one doesn't mean there's no way for the ZPD to find Tai Lung."

Sly shook his head. "I've dealt with this kind of guy plenty of times, believe me. It's not going to be that simple. I don't doubt you _could_ find him if you tried, but it's not what you should be focusing on."

Judy shifted her attention from the photos of Tai Lung to one of Peridot. "And you say that this 'Peridot' is..."

"Going to be about as well-hidden, yeah. She's smart and she's nervy. She'll have set up an effective place to hide. Probably twelve, actually." Sly tapped at a photo of the hyenas. "I'm telling you, these are your guys. Loud, dumb, arrogant. Think they own the city. Probably haven't changed their routines that much. Find them, and shake them down for info. Hit them with a carrot, make them eat a stick. Whatever cops do after you make an arrest. I wouldn't know," said Sly serenely.

"Uh huh." Judy neatly stacked the photographs and laid them on the newspaper, watching Sly intently. "I'm willing to at least see if these hyenas have anything worthwhile to say. But let's get one thing clear right now, Mr Cooper: I am _not_ letting you steal that diamond."

Sly smiled. "Good."

"... 'Good'?"

"Absolutely. I don't want you to 'let me' steal the diamond. I want you to do your best to stop me, which I'm sure will be very impressive police work which will hopefully get you a promotion." Sly lowered his shades, letting Judy see his hazel eyes. "Then, it'll be that much better when I _do_ steal it."

Judy blinked. "Are you... still wearing your domino mask?"

"Maybe." He slid the sunglasses back into place and took out his phone, tapping on it efficiently. "I look forward to secretly collaborating with you in the future. I've unblocked the number of this phone – it's a burner, of course, but feel free to call me anytime."

"Don't hold your breath, Mr Cooper."

"Please," he grinned, "call me Sly."

Judy's phone buzzed in her pocket. Sly pocketed his own phone.

"Well, time to make my daring escape."

Sly stood up and walked off.

Judy watched him for a few moments, then cautiously checked her phone. One text message.

 _My daring escape is centred around that zeppelin._

Despite herself, Judy looked upwards. The afternoon sky was empty except for a few clouds.

Her phone buzzed again.

 _ha ha_

Judy rolled her eyes.


	5. Painting the Town Red

Judy was still on the bench when Nick ran up to her. He glanced around as he caught his breath. "What? Don't tell me he left."

"He left," said Judy. "Sorry."

"Great." Nick flopped onto the bench, still winded. "Missed the intrigue."

"You alright, Nick? You seem stressed. What did Bogo want?"

"Me." Judy gave him a quizzical look, prompting him to continue. "Who has two thumbs and a position as Interpol liaison he's totally unequipped for?" Nick pointed to himself with both thumbs. "Thisss guyyyyyyyyyyyy."

Judy's face lit up. "Nick, you're the liaison? That's great! You must be so pleased!" She punched him in congratulations.

Nick smiled thinly, rubbing his arm. "Hmm. Yeah."

Judy's eyebrow raised. More softly, she said "Seriously, Nick. I'm proud of you."

Nick shifted slightly. "Thanks, Carrots, but frankly, I'm not. I made a total fool of myself in front of her! I'm pretty sure I said 'uh!' and 'um!' more times in three minutes than I did over the last fifteen years."

A grin crept onto Judy's face. "Did you say... ' _her_ '...?"

"Please don't rub it in. It gets worse – she's a fox."

"You're joking!"

"Jokes are funny," said Nick wretchedly.

"That's amazing! She sounds awesome."

"Yeah, she's... yeah." Nick coughed. "By the way, while I remember... I sorta... you're kinda off books right now. Bogo didn't want you to be liaison with me, but he also didn't want you pulling overtime to be liaison with me _anyway_ , so... apparently this was the best solution."

Judy's brow furrowed. "What? Am I using my vacation days now, or something?"

"Honestly? No idea. Ask Bogo about it, though you'll have to use super-secret backwards talk. I don't think so, though. I think the department's just gonna 'forget' to check in on you."

Judy nodded to herself. "Right..."

"Anyway, it looks like Cooper didn't kill you after all. How'd it go? What happened?"

"This." Judy passed him the photographs. "He says he wants to help us catch the other thieves."

"Gee. How nice of him." Nick frowned down at Tai Lung, then moved over to a photo of Peridot. "...What am I looking at, here?"

"This is apparently the other gang. And since I'd have to stand up and walk all the way back to headquarters to run them through the computer system, I'm doing the low-tech version; I'm running them through you. You know everyone, right?"

"Everyone in Zootopia," corrected Nick. He flicked his finger against Peridot's forehead. "Dunno who this dork is. She's obviously from out of town, but that's all I can tell you."

Judy sighed. "Guess I'll be using the computers after all."

"Aha!" Nick smiled down at the next photo – Shenzi and Banzai. "Now _these_ dorks I do know. Nasty guys, and dumb as a bag of rocks. Bad combination. I mean, it's one thing to be smart and mean, or nice and stupid... such as yourself..."

"Hah."

"But being a dumb jerk doesn't win you many friends."

"So..." Judy gave him a sly smile. "Does that mean you'd have trouble finding them?"

"Please, Carrots. Don't insult me."

"Great! Because these dumb jerks are our next lead in making sure the Nope Diamond is safe!"

Nick gave Judy a dubious look. "... Are they?"

"What?"

"It seems like it might actually be our next lead in making sure the diamond is stolen by somebody else – namely, your new best friend."

"I'm not -"

Nick patted Judy on the shoulder. "It's okay, Carrots. I know you're still adjusting to city life. Maybe back in your little farming town, all the master thieves you knew were on the level, but here in the _big city_..."

Judy took a deep breath. "Nick," she said, "these people are after the diamond. We need to stop them."

"Yeah, we do," said Nick firmly. "And we need stop Cooper, too."

"I know that! C'mon, Nick, don't patronize me!"

"Fine, fine. I'm just saying, I've been stapled to the woman whose life mission is to catch this guy. We need to be careful about getting too close to him."

"First woman you've been stapled to in years."

"Hah." Nick looked thoughtfully at the hyenas' image. "One lead," he said finally. "We'll follow one sketchy Sly Cooper lead, and then no more messing around with master thieves. Sound good?"

"Yeah," said Judy. "Okay. One sketchy lead from Sly Cooper. So!" she said brightly. "Will we go find them now?"

"What? Slow down, Carrots. Lunchbreak's almost over, and Bogo has us busy for the rest of the day. Back to work."

"What!? But you -"

"Don't worry." Nick smiled. "After our shift ends... how's about you and I get a drink?"

"On a Tuesday?" Judy raised a wry eyebrow. _"Just_ a drink?"

"I see you're already well-versed in super-secret backwards talk - oh, I _mean_ , yes, _just_ a drink. I know a place you might find interesting."

"Yeah? What's it like?"

* * *

It was a small bar in a quiet part of town – the buildings were short, in chipped red brick. A sign with understated red font read _Red Like Roses._

They'd changed out of their uniforms into casual clothes. Nick had insisted it was probably a smart move if they wanted to surreptitiously shadow three criminals. Judy saw his point.

As they entered, Judy was immediately hit with the sound of raucous laughter. The bar only had a few booths, and the hyenas' presence was obvious even though they were sitting by the back door.

Judy was about to point them out to Nick, but someone else caught her attention. Standing in the middle of the room was a young wolf in a black and red dress, whose dark fur had a red tint. Her silver eyes lit up when she saw them walk in.

"Nick! Hey there! It's been ages, how've you been?"

Nick grinned. "Hey, Ruby. I've been fine. Sorry for the absence."

"Ahh, don't worry about it. Hey, Blake!" she called to the bar. "Nick's here!"

The bar was being manned by a black bobcat wearing a dark waistcoat and white dress shirt. Her workload didn't seem too taxing, since she was reading a novel. Her gold eyes flicked upwards, and she smiled quietly. "Oh. Hello again."

"And you must be Judy!" said Ruby, bending down slightly. "It's so awesome to meet you!"

"Uh, hi," smiled Judy. "You know me?"

"Pssh, everybody knows you!" laughed Ruby. "You and Nick were big news. I, uh, was actually really hoping you'd stop by here some time. I always wanted to meet you in person."

"Sorry the reality is so underwhelming," grinned Nick.

"Oh, quit being a jerk." Ruby gave Judy a sympathetic look, though she wasn't able to hide her smile. "Dunno how you get by with this guy as your partner."

"Somehow, I manage."

"Sure, sure. Come on in, let me get you guys something!"

Ruby sped away toward the bar. Judy and Nick followed her, passing a booth near the front door.

"Well now," came a coarse voice. "Look who it is."

Nick and Judy turned around. Sitting at the booth, using two boxes to reach the table, was a small white fennec fox.

"Oh," said Nick. "Finnick."

"Oh, Finnick!" said Judy. She hopped up to sit in the booth before Nick could stop her. "How've you been keeping?"

"Good to see you, Hopps. Haven't starved to death yet."

"Well, that's the dream, isn't it?" said Nick, sliding in next to Judy.

Finnick glared at him. "Yeah. It is."

Ruby floated back to their booth, beaming and holding a small notepad. "What can I get you all?"

"You have any grape juice?" asked Judy.

"Sure!"

"I'll have a soda," said Nick.

"Right!"

"Another beer," said Finnick flatly.

"Okay! I'll be right back!" With that she disappeared again.

Judy looked between Nick and Finnick expectantly. "So... what's been up with you guys?"

"We... actually haven't talked that much over the past while," said Nick.

"You say that like it's a bad thing," noted Finnick stonily.

"Oh," said Judy. "I... kinda assumed you and Nick still kept in touch."

"Nope," said Finnick. "Haven't heard from him since he joined the police academy."

"Well, I know that must look bad," said Nick, "and I'm sorry it ended up turning out that way, but I did actually have a pretty good reason; y'see, the thing is – oh, hey, Ruby, thanks." Ruby had reappeared, and was serving the three their drinks with a quick precision.

"That was fast," said Judy as she took her glass.

Ruby shrugged. "That's how I like to work."

"Hey, before you go," said Nick, "how have the three idiots in the corner been? They causing you trouble?"

"Well..." Ruby looked uncertain. "I mean, it's nice to have customers who actually buy alcohol. I dunno what it is about this city, but people mostly just ask for juice and soda. It's kinda weird. We're a _bar_."

"Come on, you don't need to sugar-coat it."

"We believe they may be involved in a serious crime," added Judy.

"Wow, really? Regular crime wouldn't surprise me, but _serious_ crime..." Ruby shook her head as though clearing her thoughts. "Yeah, honestly? They're starting to become a bit of a problem. This is a small place, y'know? They kinda dominate the room."

"Well, they probably won't be bothering you for much longer," said Nick confidently.

Finnick scoffed. "What? Being loud is a crime now?"

"At a certain point, yes," said Judy.

"Well, you're welcome to arrest anybody you want to in my bar!" said Ruby cheerfully. Then she paused and added "Except me. Or Blake."

"We're not arresting anybody yet," said Judy cautiously.

"But if you _have_ to," said Ruby conspiratorially, "you are one-hundred percent free to do as many cool moves as you see fit."

"Thanks...?"

Ruby smiled contently and drifted off. She stopped by another booth with one rather large customer. "What about you, sir? You doing alright?"

The hippo in the incredibly conspicuous trenchcoat and hat nodded. "Could I get another lemonade?"

Ruby managed to stifle her sigh. "Sure thing."

As she went to the bar, Murray put his finger to his ear. "Yeah, Bentley? Judy and Nick are here now too."

"Great!" replied Bentley over the comms. "If you can give them a good reason to arrest those hyenas, then they can find out who's running the other gang."

"Okay. I'll try to think of something." Murray glanced at the hyenas laughing in their corner, then to Finnick, who was drumming his fingers on the table while scowling at Nick. "Strategy may not be **The Murray** 's strong suit, but I'm pretty sure I got this."

"Glad to hear it. Just try not to get _yourself_ arrested too – stealing the diamond will be a lot harder if one of us is spending time in the drunk tank."

After Ruby had given him his drink, Murray took out a notepad he'd been using for a while – mostly alternate costume ideas, as well as the occasional sketch of himself beating up bad guys. He turned to the back, ripped out a blank page, and crumpled it into a ball.

"Times are a little rough," Finnick was saying. "I needed to find a new job pretty _fast_ ," he said, shooting Nick a look. "I eventually got hired by this, like, cheese restaurant."

"Any good?" asked Judy brightly.

"Nope," said Finnick. "But it pays. And that's the important thi-"

Finnick was cut off by a ball of paper hitting him in the back of the head. He snarled and whipped around, his eyes landing on the hyenas sniggering in their corner.

"Those mangy _frickin_ '...!" Finnick jumped out of his seat and stomped toward them.

Judy frowned. "Uh, Finnick - "

Nick laid a hand on her shoulder. "Don't get in his way, Carrots." He wasn't trying to hide his smirk.

"Hey!" Finnick planted himself by the hyenas' table. "What's the big idea!?"

The hyenas shared a look, confused. "Beat it, pipsqueak," said Shenzi. "No need to get _short_ with us."

"Yeah!" said Banzai. "You got a real _short_ temper, you know that?"

Finnick's teeth were grinding. "Stop. That."

"Make us," spat Shenzi, suddenly serious. Banzai and Ed produced a crowbar and a crooked length of lead piping respectively – bringing them out just enough to let Finnick see them.

"I ain't afraid of you losers," retorted Finnick. "You're stupid, you're cowardly, and your jokes _suck_."

Shenzi glared at him. The three hyenas slid out of their seats, towering over Finnick. "Ed, take this sassy lost child round back. He needs to learn to respect grown-ups."

"Adults don't call themselves 'grown-ups', you frickin' moron," said Finnick.

Ed bent down, reaching for Finnick. "Try it," said Finnick solidly. "See what happens." Ed hesitated for a moment, uncertain, then grabbed Finnick suddenly.

This wasn't Finnick's first barfight; it wasn't even his first barfight in front of police officers. He knew the rules.

Now, it was self-defence.

Finnick bit down hard on Ed's hand, freeing himself. Then he crawled up Ed's arm and jumped at his face with a furious yell. Ed yelped, dropping his pipe in a vain attempt to pry him off.

Ruby's ears perked. She turned around and the rest of her perked too. "Oh, cool, a fight!"

Behind the bar, Blake coughed pointedly. Ruby caught herself.

"Uh, I mean... oh no stop this is my bar don't do anything cool."

" **Time for The Murray to make a** _ **stealthy escape!**_ **"** yelled Murray at the top of his voice. By some unlikely miracle, no-one heard him. Blake's ear only flicked once the back door of the bar swung closed behind him.

Banzai was taking aim at Finnick with his crowbar. Across the room, Judy sprang into action. She leapt up, flying from booth to booth, right at Banzai. She kicked at his knee, upsetting his balance. Banzai faltered, and Judy rolled and bounced off a seat and kicked his other knee. Banzai fell messily into a table, his crowbar clattering out of his hand.

Shenzi caught sight of Nick, still sipping his soda calmly. She growled and moved towards him, unfurling a thick chain. "Hey, Nick! You're a cop now, aren'tcha? Call off your _girlfriend_!"

Nick didn't move. "Give me a second. I'm not finished my drink."

Shenzi closed the distance and whipped at Nick, but aimed badly. Nick calmly tilted his head out of the way. The chain landed on the seat next to him, and Nick moved over and sat on it.

Shenzi tugged the chain sharply and Nick budged, but she couldn't dislodge him at this awkward angle. "Why a chain?" drawled Nick. "Were you intentionally aiming for the biker stereotype?"

She roared and dove at him. With a fluid, easy movement – almost as if he had done this dozens of times before – Nick slid off the seat and under the table before she reached him. He took the chain in one hand; in the other, he was still holding his soda. He walked calmly to the middle of the room while Shenzi awkwardly tried to exit the booth, now upside-down.

Ed was stumbling around wildly, clutching at the tiny dynamo of fury scratching at his face. Judy grabbed Ed's foot and twisted his leg sharply, ruining his fragile balance. Ed fell and Finnick rolled off him, huffing and puffing. Ed made no move to stand.

Nick strolled up. "Hey, Carrots? There's an angry hyena behind me."

Judy wasn't even out of breath. She pointed behind Nick. "What, that one?"

Nick didn't turn around, even as Shenzi's furious footsteps grew ever louder. "Yeah, her. D'you mind?"

"Not at all."

Judy sprung past Nick and kicked Shenzi squarely in the stomach. The hyena doubled up with an awkward wheeze, falling to her knees.

Judy landed neatly next to Nick and brushed some dust off her shirt.

Ruby's eyes were wide. "That was _awesome_ ," she breathed.

"That was expensive," replied Blake, checking for damage.

Ruby waved a hand in Blake's general direction without looking at her. " _Sshsshssh_. We're insured."

The hyenas were pooled on the floor. Shenzi shot Judy a glare while Ed frowned sadly at a speck of dust.

Finnick paced in front of them, fur bristling. "Yeah! **Yeah!** That's what you _get_! That's what you **frickin' get!** "

"Okay, pal," said Nick, "take it down a notch."

" _ **You**_ **take it down a frickin' notch!** "

Judy flashed her badge. "As officers of the ZPD - "

"Off-duty officers," corrected Nick.

"- we hereby place you under arrest - "

"Provisional arrest."

"- until– jeez, Nick, let me talk here!" Judy huffed. "Until on-duty officers can formally place you in custody. There."

"Yeah, great job, Hopps," said Finnick. "You really showed _all_ _three_ of these morons."

Judy's smile dropped suddenly. She looked to Shenzi, then Ed, then the empty space between them. She cast a look around the room. "... Um?"

"Back door," said Blake simply.

In the alley behind the bar, Banzai was sprinting towards the parking lot. He felt bad about abandoning Shenzi and Ed, but they probably would've done the same in his position. Probably. He was in serious trouble, but if he could just make it to his bike he'd at least have a shot at leaving the city and then a hippo fell on him.

It took a couple of moments for Banzai even process what had happened. Eventually his mind caught up to speed. He was no longer being crushed into the asphalt, which was good. He wasn't about to stand up, though. That was bad.

He stared up in angry confusion at the figure towering over him. "What... where the hell did you even come from?!"

"From your **worst nightmares, criminal scum!** " declared Murray. "But more literally, like, the roof."

And then he turned around and ran away.

Banzai watched him go. He had little else to do.

Nick exploded out of the bar's back door, but stopped short when he saw Banzai. "Oh. There you are." He strolled up to where Banzai was lying. "What happened to you? You trip or something? Happens to the best of us..."

Banzai turned over. It was very painful. "Agh... screw you, man."

* * *

A call was made into the department to have the hyenas properly arrested. Officers Hopps and Wilde had a brief debate about the fennec fox who was also involved. Officer Wilde expressed concern that the fox may be a deeply violent individual, representing a danger to himself and others, but Officer Hopps pointed out he had not escalated the incident himself, and had also proven helpful and co-operative to the officers. She suggested a verbal warning would suffice, and Officer Wilde reluctantly agreed.

Finnick thought the 'Officer Hopps, Officer Wilde' routine was nowhere near as humorous as Nick and Judy thought it was, but he played along. He knew better than to antagonise people actively keeping him out of jail.

Ruby was still gushing about how Judy was even cooler than she imagined when the on-duty police arrived. The hyenas were loaded sullenly into a cruiser as Nick, Judy and Ruby chatted and Blake offered the officers a tray of complimentary drinks – bar policy was the first round after a fight was free.

Across the street, from a rooftop, a certain criminal watched the scene unfold.

"Huh," said Tai Lung. "Unfortunate."


	6. No Laughing Matter

"And you think these suspects have some link to the diamond case?" Carmelita asked, trailing behind Bogo.

"I don't. Hopps does," said Bogo shortly. "Don't see the connection myself, but it's good enough for me."

Carmelita smiled. "I'm always glad to see a chief of police treat their officers with respect."

"I don't do it out of sentiment," said Bogo as they came to the interrogation rooms. "Hopps has earned it. Chances are she's right."

"Then it's all the better you listen to her, isn't it?"

"Hmm." They entered the darkened observation room, lit mostly from the glaring lights of the small interrogation rooms visible through two-way mirrors. The hyenas were separated, each sitting at the table of their own interrogation cell. "As you can see, we have the three of them here. They spent the night in lock-up, but it remains to be seen how helpful they'll decide to be."

In the first room, Shenzi was slouched in her chair, her arms folded and her expression hard. Judy sat across from her, notepad at the ready.

"Miss Veldetta," Judy was saying, "if you have any information you think might be useful to us, I think you should at least consider sharing it."

Shenzi was resolute. "I know my rights," she said firmly. "I ain't saying nothing."

Behind the mirror, Bogo shook his head. "Too smart," he remarked to Carmelita.

In the next room over, Delgato sat across from Ed. The lion had his head in his hands.

"For the fifth time," said Delgato, his voice beginning to break, "please state your _name_."

Ed squinted at him uncertainly. Then he sniggered, a hoarse uneven sound apparently connected to nothing.

"Too... stupid," said Bogo, his tone bordering on genuine worry. Carmelita frowned, concerned.

In the final room, Banzai sat alone. Even though there was no officer with him, he was clearly uneasy. His fingers drummed against the table and his eyes darted around, frequently landing on the mirror and the door.

"Ah... just stupid enough," said Bogo. "This idiot will have to contend with one of our finest interrogators."

"Anyone I know?" asked Carmelita.

"As it happens..."

* * *

Banzai started when the door of the interrogation room opened suddenly. Nick entered, his sunglasses glinting in the hard light. A folder was in the crook of his arm, and in each hand he held a large chocolate bar. He whacked the door closed with his hip and sat across from Banzai, laying both bars on the table. Banzai looked at them in wary expectation.

Nick made a show of following Banzai's gaze. "Oh! No. These are both for me."

Nick flicked lazily through the folder, then pushed it disinterestedly to one side. "You're in trouble, Banzai. It's up to me to determine how much."

Banzai growled at him. "You think I'm scared of you?"

"Yes," said Nick. "You're scared of pretty much everything. You're scared of some things for reasons you don't fully understand. So let me make this simple for you: answer my questions, or I'll give you something _real_ scary to deal with."

Banzai shifted in his chair, folding his arms. "Look... Shenzi wouldn't - "

Nick dramatically smacked his own forehead. "Oh, that's right! I completely forgot!" He reached for the folder, closing it. "You aren't actually an adult. You're a giant toddler that Shenzi looks after, which is why you do everything she says without question." He went to stand. "Very sorry about this, little guy. I'll see if I can track down your mommy to pick you up."

Banzai leaned forward. "Hey! I'm not a baby!"

"Then start talking" said Nick seriously. "Because that's what a mature, rational adult would do. Forget about what Shenzi wants, or what anybody else wants, and think about what _you_ want. We have your records here at the station. All three of you are going to jail anyway. But _where_ you go to jail is still up in the air. I hear Doug Ramses needs a new cellmate. You remember Doug, don't you? He was the guy who -"

"I know, I know!" said Banzai quickly. "Don't... talk to me about that Night Howler stuff, man. It skeeves me out."

"Oh, it does?" said Nick earnestly. "You think it's creepy, huh?"

"Yeah!"

"Well, _I'm_ the one who was in the middle of it," said Nick darkly. " _I'm_ the one who took a bullet from Dawn Bellwether herself. So take it from me – there are scarier people in the world than Shenzi. _Answer my questions_."

"You haven't even asked me any questions!" yelped Banzai.

Nick settled into his seat. "I don't bother doing things unless I know they're worth my time. So, what will it be? You going to co-operate, or will I tell Doug to start decorating?"

Banzai shifted uncomfortably for a few moments. "Fine," he said. "What's this about?"

"Good." Nick produced one of Sly's photos from the warehouse, holding it so Banzai could see it but anybody in the observation room couldn't. "You and your friends have been doing something a little... bigger than the usual stuff, haven't you? Something a few steps above vandalism and bar fights. All we need to know is the name of the person in charge."

Banzai hesitated for a moment before answering. "... It's Scar."

Nick's confused blink was hidden by his sunglasses. "It's _Scar_?"

"Yeah! I mean... probably. He used to give us some jobs years ago. Little stuff. We hadn't heard from him in ages – Shenzi figured he got too high and mighty for the likes of us – but then this mysterious guy hires us for a weird job. I mean, he never told us his name, and he'd only talk to us over the phone – he had this thing that made his voice sound all deep? – but it's gotta be him. He says crap like ' _I will not tolerate this insubordination_ '... who even talks like that?"

"That's... a very interesting claim." Nick unwrapped a chocolate bar. "See, I'd accuse you of just pointing your finger at the most evil-looking guy in the newspaper, but you don't read the newspaper, do you? ... _Can_ you read?"

"Screw you, man."

* * *

Across town, the Cooper Gang were sitting down to breakfast – and to another presentation. Bentley had the screen displaying a picture Ruby had uploaded to social media, showing Judy and Nick smiling outside her bar. Visible in the background, although slightly blurry, was a hyena being put in the back of a police cruiser.

Bentley cleared his throat. "Alright, first thing's first. I'm happy to confirm that the three hyenas have been placed in custody for their involvement in an altercation last night. Thanks to Murray – and to Hopps and Wilde – they're off the streets and into the clutches of ZPD interrogators."

"Solid work, pal."

"Thanks, guys!"

"Chances are the ZPD won't be in a hurry to release them, even in the unlikely event they're smart enough not to admit to anything. We can safely assume that they'll still be behind bars come Friday night – so we've already dealt a substantial blow to the other gang, by decimating their numbers!"

Sly took a bite of some toast. "I dunno if I'd really consider this a major victory. Those guys aren't exactly expert criminals. Hell, we might've just done the other team a favour."

"Be that as it may, it's a definite start. So without further ado, let's get down to business."

Bentley moved the screen to an image of Okonkwo. "This is the museum's curator – T'Challa Okonkwo. This guy is seriously smart, and not just as an academic. He's the reason I didn't want to hit the museum if we could avoid it – which, apparently, we couldn't."

"Yeah... sorry, pal."

"Don't blame yourself, Sly – blame Tai Lung and his associates. As I was saying, stealing the diamond from Okonkwo's museum would be a challenge even without a limited time-frame. But I've managed to construct a workable plan which requires a minimum of preparation. Our best shot is to strike on the night the exhibit opens. We'll need to steal three things before then; an invitation, a set of alarm schematics... and a subway train."

"Sounds like my kinda plan."

"Definitely!" yelled Murray. "The Zootopia Transit Authority **won't know what hit it!** "

"I'm glad to see you're both in enthusiastic for the job. The subway train will be serving as our exit strategy. The museum used to have its own stop on the line. It was undergoing renovations along with the rest of the building earlier this year... when a certain pair of at-the-time-not-police-officers happened to explode a train full of bio-hazardous material there."

"I'm guessing that was...?"

"Indeed so."

"Wow. They really get around, huh?"

"So it would seem. In any case, the stop has since been closed for good – but it's still there, connected directly into the city's rail network. I propose we make use of that. I've picked out a depot in the Rainforest District which should be easy enough for the three of us to hit. We'll steal a train, bring it back here to hide it, and then park it close to the museum on Friday night. After we steal the diamond, we can ride it back here and get back in the van – a strategy which I believe will allow us to avoid the majority of police activity as we leave the city. Do either of you have any questions?"

"... Are you _sure_ we can't secure a zeppelin?"

"For the last time, Sly, no! No zeppelins! Where is this even coming from?"

"I just think it'd be... impressive, is all."

Bentley sighed. "Anyway, moving on... the invitation. The diamond is being presented at a fancy ceremony, and Okonkwo's been very discerning about who's coming. He personally approved everybody on the guest-list. We can't _just_ steal an invitation; we'll need to seem like the real deal in order to get inside. So with that in mind, allow me to introduce you to Mr Sonchou Tortimer."

The screen flicked to a picture of an elderly tortoise, squinting at the camera through a pair of rounded spectacles.

"Mr Tortimer is a former mayor of Zootopia, and he's a candidate in the upcoming election – which means he's been invited. Despite his previous success, he's definitely not a frontrunner. He hasn't been making many public appearances, probably as a result of his advanced age. That suits our purposes just fine. Even with the wide selection of candidates in the race, Tortimer's the only person one of us could conceivably pass for."

"I dunno, Bentley... Murray just looks too naturally youthful."

"Hilarious, Sly. I'll be the one disguised as Tortimer. We'll have to avoid anyone who knows him too well, but it should be sufficient to fool the guards. Murray, I can bring you in as my plus-one; you'll be playing the part of a nondescript helper."

"You got it, buddy! I play nondescript parts like **nobody's business!** "

"You... sure do. Sly, an invitation's only good for two people, so you'll have to enter the old-fashioned way."

"That's always an option. Or – just throwing this out there – I'm sure I could convince some nice young woman on the guest-list to let me in as her date."

"No comment," said Bentley, and Sly frowned.

"I'm afraid in order for me to impersonate Tortimer, we'll have to steal the specific invitation he's already received. Sly, you'll have to break into his house and take it."

"Should I be worried? Does he have laser systems in his rec room, or something?"

"Nothing of the sort. It's just the entirely ordinary house of an elderly man."

"Oh. Alright then."

There was a pause. After a few moments, Murray said "Jeez, Bentley, that seems kinda... evil. We're stealing an old man's invitation to a nice party. Is he even a criminal?"

"No," said Bentley. "Just a normal old man, who was apparently a pretty decent mayor."

The pause continued. Finally Sly said "So... what's the third thing? Schematics?"

"Right," said Bentley flatly. He switched the screen to images of the museum. Packs of wolves patrolled through the corridors, and the walls were lined with various electrical devices.

"Okonkwo's beefed up security, both in terms of guards and alarm systems. To save time, we'll only really be dealing with the latter – we'll just have to give the guards a wide berth as much as possible. Unfortunately, the alarms are heavy-duty; they're XJ-0461 models, the latest in electronic security. I could probably crack them, but not in under two days. I'm going to need a cheat code, in the form of their original schematics; which, thankfully, are right here in Zootopia. Tundra Town's very own Lombax Labs manufactures the systems Okonkwo is using. If we break in and gain access to their secured mainframe, I'll be able to establish complete control over the museum's security!"

"Assuming Peridot doesn't try the exact same thing at the exact same time."

"Valid point, Sly. The other gang hasn't been dealt with yet, and we need to be wary of anything they might try over the next few days. But if we keep our eyes open and we stay on our toes, I'm sure we can handle anything that might come our way."

"You got that right, pal."

* * *

Nick exited the interrogation room, holding his folder of notes and the uneaten chocolate bar. Judy was waiting for him in the hallway.

"Hey, Carrots. You weren't watching?"

"I only just ended my own session. Shenzi wouldn't co-operate at all," reported Judy sullenly. Nick offered her the chocolate bar and she perked up a little, taking it. "What about you?"

 _"_ Oh, I got something alright. Banzai says the guy in charge is Scar."

"The weird guy running for mayor?"

"That Scar, yes, not the one who runs the local daycare. Banzai claimed that his gang was hired to move an unspecified object after, quote, "that jerkass snow leopard", end quote, acquired it. They weren't told what it was, nor were they ever going to be – which, I gotta admit, sounds very much like how Scar would plan a diamond heist."

"Great! We're really making progress!"

"Absolutely," said Nick. "I can't wait to see Scar lie to our faces about this. That should be fun."

"I thought you said you were only going to follow one lead."

"Are you kidding me?" said Nick. "This testimony claims that Scar Kifalme is actually _doing something_ _._ Probably mostly from the comfort of his home, sure, but still. It's almost fantastical. This, I gotta see. Besides, we didn't get this one from - " and immediately stopped talking because Chief Bogo was entering earshot.

"Nice work in there, Wilde," Bogo said without breaking his stride. "You and Hopps have my permission to go question Mr Kifalme. Keep it up."

"Yes sir. Thanks, sir."

Bogo was soon gone, but then the two were approached by Carmelita.

"Hello again, Nick. And you would be Judy, right?" Carmelita offered a paw.

Judy shook it enthusiastically. "Yes, that's me! It's a pleasure to meet you, Inspector."

"Believe me, the pleasure is mine," said Carmelita. "What you and Nick have achieved in the name of this city is nothing short of incredible. You two are a credit to police everywhere."

"Awh," said Judy, "thank you."

"Speaking of..." Carmelita turned to Nick. "Truly impressive work in there, Nick. You were in complete control the entire time. That was better than a lot of Interpol interrogations I've seen."

Nick smiled sheepishly at the floor. "Well, I mean..."

"Oh yeah, the academy barely trained Nick at this stuff," said Judy proudly. "He's a natural."

"Come on, Carrots, don't embarrass me."

"It only makes sense," Judy continued brightly. "He's had loads of experience at this kind of thing." Nick's smile immediately fell.

"Uh, Hopps -"

"Y'see, before he joined the ZPD, Nick was -"

"A salesman!" blurted Nick. "I was in sales! So I know how to... sell. To people."

Carmelita raised an eyebrow. "I see. Well, I'd love to stay and talk, but I have some files I need to look over. I'll call you if I need anything. Again, Judy, lovely to meet you."

"Likewise," smiled Judy.

"Yeah, I'll be... around...!" said Nick.

They watched Carmelita disappear around a corner. Nick didn't speak until she was gone. "God! Why were you about to tell her I used to hustle people for a living!?"

Judy gave him a dubious look. "I was going to say you were very active socially and knew people all over the city."

Nick stared at her. "Oh. Well. That... doesn't make me feel like less of an idiot."

"Oh, Nick," said Judy sympathetically. "Do you really think she'll look down on you just because you used to be a con artist?"

"Yes," said Nick.

"Oh. Well, try to relax, okay? You're not much help to her all stressed out."

"Knowing that just makes me more stressed out," said Nick glumly. He sighed. "Let's not talk about it, okay? Banzai pointed us toward Scar, so, let's go bother Scar."

"Would that cheer you up?"

Nick smiled thinly. "It might."

They were walking past one of the CCTV cameras of the building. It was a high-end, recent model, which recorded not just a video feed, but audio as well.

Unfortunately, the cyber-security left something to be desired.

* * *

In a dark room halfway across Zootopia, Peridot glared at her monitor, displaying the footage of Nick and Judy continuing down the hallway. She banged both fists on her desk. " **Double** unfortunate! That spineless clod couldn't keep his mouth shut, and now our entire operation could be jeopardised!" She fumbled for her keyboard. "I gotta report this right away!"


	7. The Lion's Den

It took a while for Judy and Nick to drive to Scar's listed address – it was tucked into an awkward corner of Savannah Central, quite some distance from any other residences. When they pulled up to the gate, Judy couldn't help but raise an eyebrow. The property was small for a mansion; that is to say, it was still needlessly, opulently large for a house, particularly with only one occupant. The gate was black and spiked, and the estate was completely surrounded by a tall brick wall.

"Now remember," said Nick from the passenger seat, "your folksy 'friend to all living things' schtick might work wonders on children and the elderly, but Scar is more sarcasm than animal. Let me handle things."

"You want to take the lead when it comes to sarcasm?" said Judy. "Wow, what a surprise."

"See, that's baby stuff. Entry level. Exactly my point."

"Hmm." Judy unrolled the window and stuck her arm out to press the buzzer next to the gate, but the distance between it and their car was just too far. She sighed, undid her seatbelt, and jumped through the window, pressing it in mid-air.

There was no response. Judy looked to Nick, who shrugged calmly. "Try it again in a couple seconds." After a pause, she did.

Finally, a voice came through the speaker. It was smooth and sophisticated, but something about the tone immediately rubbed Judy the wrong way. "Yes? Who's there?"

Judy went to answer, but stopped herself and gave Nick an expectant, wry look instead. Nick smiled at her, then turned to the buzzer. "Hey, Scar. I'd say something like 'Is that you?', but since this is your house it feels pretty redundant."

"My word, is that Nicholas Wilde?"

"In the flesh."

"And – just a guess – is Officer Hopps perhaps with you as well...?"

"I am," said Judy, before Nick could answer for her. "We were hoping to have a quick word with you."

"By all means! Please, do come in."

The buzzer clicked, and a moment later, the gate began to swing open electronically. Judy jumped up and clambered back through the window, and then redid her seatbelt.

Nick raised an eyebrow. "Really? It's a driveway, Carrots."

"Well, it's a stupidly long driveway," retorted Judy, "and the guy who owns the house is probably evil."

Nick rolled his eyes and looked out his window. "If only you were this cautious _all_ the time..." he muttered to himself.

They eventually pulled up to Scar's thick, black front door. He was already waiting for them in the doorway. He was small for a lion – scrawny, almost frail. His clothes – black suit trousers and a deep green dress shirt – were rumpled and creased, but still struck Judy as oddly formal for home wear. In one hand he was gripping a black cane with a rounded handle of polished silver.

He smiled at Nick and Judy as they exited their cruiser. "Forgive me for not _leaping_ for the buzzer – bad back, you know."

"It's fine," said Nick casually. "Wouldn't want to inconvenience you too much."

Scar held up a hand. "Not at all. It's my honour and privilege to have you here." His green eyes fell on Judy – she tried to ignore the wound on his face. "The famed Officer Judith Hopps, visiting my humble abode."

"Please, just call me 'Judy'," she replied. "I have an older sister that goes by Judith."

"Of course you do," murmured Nick. Scar just smiled thinly.

He gestured them inside, leading the way. He walked with a slight limp; the cane seemingly wasn't just for show.

The interior of the house was mostly in black and dark browns. Scar lead them through a wide hallway which felt strangely gloomy considering the bright sunshine outside. Along the walls hung various portraits, mostly depicting tall, gaunt figures wearing black clothes in grim locales.

"How long has it been, Nicholas?" asked Scar over his shoulder.

"Oh, a year or two, at least," said Nick. "I think the last time we spoke was at one of Mufasa's parties."

"Hmm," said Scar, his tone immediately souring. "Yes, I suppose that sounds right."

They entered a spacious living room – ornate but poorly kept, with old newspapers and other detritus cluttering the fancy tables and even spilling onto the carpet. Scar gestured toward two large, dark green armchairs, taking a long couch for himself.

"Y'know, speaking of," said Nick as he took a seat, "I'm kinda surprised your brother isn't in the election himself. I would've thought he'd be interested."

"Yes, well," said Scar dismissively. "He doesn't feel that now is a good time to go out into the world campaigning. I suppose I – and the other candidates – should be grateful for that. Mufasa is first and foremost a family man... not that that's stopped _Dreemurr_ ," Scar muttered venomously. "Besides, he's still upset over Lionheart's arrest."

"Were the two of them close?" asked Judy. The chair was far too big for her, but she had long ago gotten used to such things.

"Insufferably so," said Scar. "And off the record, however much of a blowhard Leodore was while in office, I assure you he was _worse_ as a teenager."

"I can only imagine," smirked Nick. "What about you? How are you feeling about your own chances?"

"It's still very much anyone's race," said Scar haughtily. "And although my current standing may be, what, twenty-seventh, twenty-sixth, something like that...? I still believe I have a good chance of claiming the position of mayor."

"Quite the election we have this year, huh?" said Nick. "Downright bizarre." Judy shifted, trying not to let her impatience show.

"Indeed so," said Scar. "Such an interesting collection of figures in this running – though no-one is looking forward to Mayor Dewey's replacement more than Mayor Dewey." He chuckled lightly. "He's done well, certainly, but the pressures of office took their toll on him from the beginning. I hear his assistant is the real reason the city held together so well after the Bellwether... incident."

"Isabelle's a municipal hero, no doubt about it," said Nick. "Long may she juggle stacks of paperwork."

"Well, you two would know what it is to be a hero, wouldn't you?" said Scar, his eyes gleaming. "I'd like to take this opportunity to thank you both for your service. The two of you handled the Night Howler debacle excellently. This city cannot thank you enough."

"You know about that, huh?" said Judy.

Scar smirked. "Judith, _ev_ erybody knows about that."

"Like I said, 'Judy' is fine," said Judy, a little icily, "and maybe we should get to the reason we're 'visiting' you today."

"Certainly," said Scar. "I must admit I'm curious as to why you're here. Am I in trouble, officers?"

"Not yet you're not," smiled Nick.

Judy produced a notepad and her carrot pen. "We were hoping you could answer a few brief questions."

Scar's eyes fell on the pen. "Well, now. Is that _the_ pen? The same one from the Bellwether case?"

"Um," said Judy, "yes." She was suddenly uncomfortable for reasons she couldn't fully articulate, police instincts working faster than rational thought.

Scar's smirk didn't waver. "Perhaps when it runs out of ink you'd consider donating it to Okonkwo's museum, hmm? It's an important piece of recent history..."

"Come on, Scar," said Nick, still laid-back. "Don't change the subject. The sooner you answer the questions, the sooner we'll be out of your mane."

"Forgive me. What is it you wanted to ask?"

Judy gave Nick a nod. Nick leaned back in his chair and said "You remember Shenzi and her boys, don't you?"

"What, is that the first question?" Scar chuckled. "Yes, I do. I knew them well, quite some time ago. Employed them in odd jobs occasionally."

"And have you had any recent contact with them?" asked Judy.

Scar met her gaze calmly. "I'm afraid to say I haven't seen them in years."

"Well, that's an interesting reply," said Nick. "See, they've gotten themselves into a bit of trouble. Rolling with a bad crowd. And they told us you might know something about that."

"Is that so?" said Scar drily. "They claimed a wealthy socialite running for mayor was one of their partners in crime?"

"Hey, I had my doubts too," said Nick. "But you know how it is. Bogo wanted us to go get an _official statement_..."

"Yes," said Scar sourly, " _Bogo_. Well, I'm afraid I couldn't tell you anything about that."

"There's no information you can offer?" said Judy. "You deny having contact with the hyenas?"

"As I said, I haven't seen them in years. Is there anything else I can help you with?"

Judy made a note of that, for whatever good it might do her. She was considering what her next question should be when Nick slid out of his chair.

"Well then," he said cheerfully. "I think we're about done here."

Judy couldn't hold back her surprise. "What? But – "

"Now now, Carrots, Scar's a busy man. Let's not waste any more of his time." Nick gave Scar a bright smile. "Sorry to inconvenience you like this."

Scar returned the gesture, although his smile looked considerably less bright. "Oh, not at all. It's good to have visitors once in a while. Mostly I have to find ways to occupy myself. I've recently gotten into horticulture; my carnations are coming along nicely, I must say."

Scar led them back out the way they had came. Judy stomped along behind Nick. She was irritated, but didn't say anything. Nick probably knew what he was doing.

Probably.

"I wish you the best of luck in your investigations," called Scar as they got back into their cruiser.

"I appreciate the sentiment, Mr Kifalme," said Judy out the window, "but Nick and I don't need luck."

Scar smiled thinly. "That famous Hopps spirit. Judith, Nicholas. _Adieu_."

Judy pulled away, intentionally keeping her face expressionless. Nick, for his part, looked mildly amused. Scar watched them drive off for a few moments before disappearing back into his house.

Once he was out of view, Judy sighed. "I'm not really sure how I was _expecting_ that to go, but..."

"You're disappointed he didn't admit he was behind everything and beg for us to arrest him?" asked Nick.

"Yeah," mumbled Judy. "Something like that." The gate swung shut behind their car, and Judy began the long drive back to headquarters. "Did we get _anything_ out of that interview?"

"Oh, I think we did," said Nick. "After that, I'm willing to bet he's our guy."

"What? But he outright denied contacting the hyenas."

"Ah," said Nick, "but he _didn't_. He exact-words'd us. He said, and I quote, 'I haven't seen them in years'. Key word: ' _seen_ '. Banzai testified that the mastermind of this gang only interacted with the other members by phone, and used a voice modulator to boot. Scar hasn't literally _seen_ the hyenas in years. That's the truth. Doesn't mean he wasn't in contact with them."

Judy kept her eyes on the road, but raised a wry eyebrow. "I see. So it's kinda like telling somebody you were a 'salesman' when most people might use a term more like 'con artist'."

Nick deflated in his seat. "It's technically true," he grumbled.

"Exactly."

"I panicked, okay? Don't... quit rubbing it in my face, will you?"

"Sure! I'll be happy to not quit rubbing it in your face!"

Nick sighed, his eyes low. Judy laughed gently, but felt a twinge of guilt. "Sorry, sorry. Please, keep explaining how good Scar is at lying."

"Give the creep some credit, Carrots," said Nick, perking up. "It's not _just_ lying. It's a very fancy, show-off way of lying."

"There's nothing strictly _illegal_ about lying to police officers," Judy murmured to herself. "It's only an offence to lie about your identifying information..."

"Yeah," said Nick, "and he'd be more than happy to remind us of who he is. Oh, but we _could_ legally force him to admit his name isn't actually 'Scar'! He hates that."

"I'm honestly tempted," muttered Judy. "But after we do that, what's stopping us from saying 'Look, maybe you haven't _seen_ the hyenas, but have you, say, contacted them by phone'?"

Nick shrugged. "At a certain point, he'll just start lying for real. It's not like he's going to admit to anything. Right now, he's gloating; rubbing it in our faces that we have nothing on him. Which we kinda _don't_ , honestly. Banzai only thought the guy on the phone was Scar. Right now, nobody can actually prove anything – maybe not even Tai Lung or What's-Her-Name. And Scar's gonna keep it that way."

"So further interviews will just be a waste of time."

"Afraid so, Carrots."

"Dammit," said Judy, taking a sharp turn with very slightly more power than was necessary.

"I'd also like to point out how he deliberately brought up the carrot pen. That was intentional. 'I know your tricks. I remember what happened to Bellwether. It won't work again'."

"That's a good point," said Judy morosely. " I guess we're going to have to be careful about handling him."

"What I still don't get," said Nick, "is _why_. Scar's capable of this kind of sleaziness, but why bother? Stealing diamonds is a lot of work, rich folks don't tend to risk jail time. It's not worth it. Cooper's easy to understand; he likes the actual stealing part, and he'll probably just end up putting the thing on his mantelpiece or something. But Scar? If he wanted the diamond so badly, he could just buy the damn thing."

"That's _also_ a good point," said Judy. "Do you think it might have something to do with the election?"

"I mean, probably," said Nick. "That's where Scar _should_ be focusing, if he wants any chance of finishing higher than twenty-seventh. But what's the connection?"

They lapsed into a rare silence. Judy ran back through their meeting with Scar in her head, trying to find something, anything, that might be useful.

 _The gleam in Scar's eyes. "Well, you two would know what it is to be a hero, wouldn't you?"_

Suddenly more moments came back to her at once, simultaneous but clear.

 _Okonkwo laughed quietly. "You two_ are _Zootopia's Finest."_

" _Pssh, everybody knows you!" laughed Ruby. "You and Nick were big news. I, uh, was actually really hoping you'd stop by here some time."_

 _" _Believe me, the pleasure is mine," said Carmelita. "What you and Nick have achieved in the name of this city is nothing short of incredible."__

Judy turned it over for a moment. "Uh, Nick? This might sound arrogant, but... I think I have a possible motive."

"What is it?"

"He wants to be... us."

 _"Who doesn't?" replied Nick. "Everybody is envious of my good looks, natural charisma and long list of successes, as well as your... we're both good in our own way, I mean."_

"I wonder if anybody's envious of your terrible sense of humour," said Judy flatly.

"I can only assume so. Anyway, Carrots, what's your angle?"

"Well... remember all the attention you and I got after we stopped Bellwether?"

"Was that a good if overly busy time? Yes, yes it was." Nick smiled distantly. "We never __did__ get on that talk show in the end..."

"If, say, one of us tried running for mayor – in an election that was taking place right after, or during, the time we were celebrities..."

Nick's eyes widened. "Oh ho, Carrots, I think you might be on to something. Scar noticed the media circus around us after the Night Howler stuff, because his eyes still work and he owns a smartphone..."

"... and he's decided he needs a similar boost in public image in order to win the election..."

"... but he can't just stop a giant conspiracy out of nowhere..."

"... because he can't be sure there's anything important enough happening for him __to__ stop..."

"Well, I was going to say 'because that would mean leaving the house', but yeah, that too."

"So he's engineering a suitably important __fake__ crime, that he can publicly foil!"

"The theft of the Nope Diamond." Nick smirked at her. "The current obsession of every optimistic bunny in the city."

Judy returned his look. "Oh, I think even a cynical fox would recognize that saving something so economically significant is a big deal."

"Absolutely. Congratulations, Carrots. You have a motive."

Judy gripped the steering wheel tightly. "Alright!"

"A motive that will sound com _ _pletely__ ridiculous if you pitch it to Bogo."

Judy's ears fell, and Nick laid a hand on her shoulder. "Hey, I believe you! I think it makes perfect sense! It's just... try telling the Chief that Scar's paid two master criminals and three idiots to fake-steal a diamond so that he can fake-steal it back in order to actually steal the hopes and dreams of everyone in Zootopia. And then win an election."

"Aaaaaaagh," said Judy, not for the first time that week. "This is so frustrating! What are we supposed to do now?"

"Don't worry, Carrots," said Nick. "Scar's smart, but he's not quite as smart as he thinks he is. After all, the smart thing to do would be to __actually lie__ , not taunt us. There must be something he's overlooking. We stay on our toes, keep our eyes open, and eventually, he'll slip up. And then we'll take him down. After all," he grinned, "you and I are heroes, right?"

"Yeah," said Judy, smiling to herself. "Apparently, we are."

"And who knows," said Nick nonchalantly, "maybe he and Cooper will end up killing each other or something."

"Nick! That's terrible!"

"What? Makes our jobs easier." Judy shot him a quick glare, and he shrugged. "Hey, I'm just saying...!"

The car's radio crackled. "Judy? Nick? You guys there?"

"Hey, Clawhauser," said Nick. "What do you need?"

"Chief Bogo ordered in Tai Lung's extended file from overseas," said Clawhauser, with perhaps more boyish excitement than was appropriate. "It's just arrived! Come back to the precinct and we can read it!"

"Copy that, Clawhauser," said Judy. "Inform Inspector Fox as well, would you?"

"Can do!" The radio went quiet.

Nick sighed. "Alright, then. Back to the __first__ jerk."


	8. Vixen The Problem

[ _Because I have more editing software than common sense, I made a 20-second trailer for this story. It's at ironicsnap(doot)tumblr(doot)com/post/145401705797 if you're interested in seeing it!]_

* * *

Nick and Judy hurried into ZPD Headquarters. The drive had been long, and they didn't want to keep Clawhauser and Carmelita waiting any longer than was necessary. Clawhauser was at his usual post at the front desk, and Carmelita was talking to him, arms folded.

"Sorry about the delay," Clawhauser was saying. "Our computer system has always been a little slow, but lately it's been even worse."

"I suggest investigating that immediately," said Carmelita. "You can't afford to assume it's benign. Not with two highly skilled criminal hackers in the city."

"Ooh... that's a good point," said Clawhauser somewhat sheepishly. "I'll see what I can do."

"Good."

They both turned as Nick and Judy ran up to the desk. "Ah, there you two are," Carmelita smiled. "How was the interview with Scar?"

"He admitted to nothing," reported Judy. "But still, we have reason to believe he's involved."

Carmelita nodded. "I understand. If you need any help, I'd be glad to lend a hand."

"Thanks, Inspector Fox," said Nick.

She grinned. "Please, Nick. 'Carmelita' is fine."

Nick smiled bashfully. "Noted." He turned to Clawhauser. "So? What does Tai Lung's file say?"

"Oh, I don't know," said Clawhauser cheerily. "I haven't read it yet. I was waiting on you guys."

"... of course," said Nick.

Clawhauser threw the file open. "Alrighty then, let's have a look..." The first page was biographical information. Clawhauser hummed to himself as he skimmed through it. "Hmm... no biological family, but his legal guardian is listed as someone named Shifu, who was running a kung fu dojo..."

"I guess that makes sense," said Judy. "He's probably been training since childhood."

Clawhauser turned to the next page, which recounted the details of Tai Lung's first offence – and so far the only crime he had been successfully convicted of. "Okay... so way back, he was finishing his training... there was some kind of dispute over a title, or something? Tai Lung thought he'd get it, but it went to this other student instead... he and Shifu had a fight about it... and then they had, like, a _fight_ about it, like a sparring match, and..." Clawhauser suddenly covered his mouth in shock. "Oh my goodness!"

Carmelita and Judy shared a look. "What?" demanded Nick. "What is it?"

"He... Shifu was kinda old, and Tai Lung hit him too hard – accidentally! – and he..." Clawhauser shifted uncomfortably. "... Tai Lung pleaded guilty to manslaughter."

Judy gasped. Nick blinked in shock. Carmelita just shook her head.

"Oh goodness, this is just _awful_!" said Clawhauser. "His own step-dad... I feel so bad for him now!"

Nick cleared his throat. "He, uh... he assaulted half the department, Ben."

Clawhauser nodded. "Yes, definitely, absolutely." He turned back to the file, looking at the next page. "Then it's just all the stuff he's done since... huh. That's a little funny."

"What is?" said Judy.

"There's a long gap between that first case and the next crime he's wanted for."

"Is it the time he spent in jail?" asked Nick drily.

"No," said Clawhauser, a little wounded. "It's longer. He served his sentence, and then didn't do anything for a few years. Then there's a theft listed here, and then..." Clawhauser flicked through the next several pages. "Gosh. This is a lot. And all over the place, too."

"Why the gap?" wondered Judy. "Something must be significant about that first theft."

"Yeah," said Nick. "He ran out of food."

"...What?"

"I don't know what it's like in his homeland, but I've seen this exact thing happen to a lot of guys here in Zootopia. You come out of jail 'rehabilitated', go to get a minimum wage job somewhere... and can't. Once your unemployment pay runs out, well..."

Judy rubbed her neck. "Does... that happen? Sure, some jobs are restricted..."

"Police officers, for instance," offered Carmelita.

"Yeah, exactly. But there's no laws about hiring an ex-convict in a private company."

"Right you are, Carrots," said Nick. He spoke with the usual smug tone he adopted whenever Judy verbally wandered into a trap, but there was an edge of tiredness there too. Anger. "Which _means_ there's no anti-discrimination legislation in place either. Employers can just _happen_ to choose never employ anybody with a 'dirty record'. And there's nothing an ex-con can do about it."

Judy's ears drooped. "... oh."

Nick shook his head. "Once your options are restricted like that... it doesn't tend to end well. I mean, really. You think Finnick graduated high school _hoping_ to be a professional fake baby for a popsicle hustler?"

"I... guess I hadn't thought of it that way," said Judy quietly.

"We can't all get jobs at the DMV. Okay, bad example. The DMV is actually super strict about hiring. But you know what I mean."

"So, we have a motive" said Carmelita. "He's given up on legal employment, and now Scar – or whoever it is that's behind this – is paying his bills."

"I dunno if that's it," said Clawhauser meekly. "I mean, if he just needed money, he could just steal it, right? A lot of these crimes are thefts. Maybe Scar – or, um, whoever – is giving him something else?"

Judy thought for a moment, then clicked her fingers. "The Mayor's office has the power to bestow official pardons!" she said. "It doesn't happen very often, but it's there in municipal law. Any outstanding warrants for an individual's arrest can be cleared with the right paperwork."

"That's probably it then," said Nick. "Tai Lung helps Scar, and in return, Scar cleans his record and gives him an actual job somewhere. Scar's not going to actually _do_ that, of course, but he doesn't have to. All he needs to do is convince Tai Lung he _will_. One last crime spree before Tai Lung gets the life he thinks is owed him after serving his original sentence; instead of, y'know, living in an inescapable spiral of crime because society has forever judged him to be an irredeemable waste of fur."

Judy sagged. "Great. Now _I'm_ starting to feel bad for him."

"Don't."

Judy, Nick and Clawhauser looked up at Carmelita in surprise. She stood resolutely, arms folded and eyes closed.

"I've been an inspector at Interpol for years, and in that time, I've heard them all. Poverty, failed careers, rough childhoods. A strange, _idiotic_ compulsion to follow in your parents' criminal footsteps out of some twisted sense of tradition." When she opened her eyes, they were burning with anger. "Some excuses are better than others. But they're all still just _excuses_. It doesn't matter why they do it. Our focus should always be on stopping them. Zero tolerance."

Judy frowned uncertainly. "But... empathy is important too, right? We need to show understanding."

Carmelita sighed. "You're a good cop, Judy, so let me give you some advice. Don't let yourself get soft on your targets. Your job isn't to make friends; it's to protect the public from the thugs and the morons who refuse to play by everyone else's rules. Don't cloud your judgement with needless pity. It's a mistake."

"I... don't know if I agree with that," said Judy.

Clawhauser smiled brightly at Carmelita. "Oh, that's our Judy. She's always been down to earth like that."

"It helps that she's literally closer to earth," smirked Nick.

"Nick, you're like, one foot taller than me."

"And I always will be," he replied smugly.

"I'm glad you two can find so much time for jokes, but this _isn't_ a game" snapped Carmelita. Nick's smile died awkwardly. "There are a lot of criminals in the world," she continued, "and every moment we waste is one we let them run rampant. Mark my words; it's a dark path. No matter how justified they seem, how sympathetic, how _charming_ , it's only a matter of time before they end up doing something completely inexcusable."

* * *

Meanwhile, Sly was on his way home from robbing an elderly man.

Murray was quiet for the drive back from Tortimer's house. Sly chalked it up to the job being too mundane to even talk about.

He'd been in and out in under a minute. He'd entered through an open window and found the invitation in a stack of unopened mail in the hallway. There had been no sign of Tortimer; as far as he was aware, he had literally caught the old man napping. And now he was back in the van, his feet on the dashboard and the envelope in hand.

Bentley's voice came over the comms. "Guys, what's your ETA?"

Sly put his finger to ear, answering so Murray could focus on the road. "We're just pulling up to the shop now."

"Good. Get inside quickly. There's something you should both see." Sly and Murray shared a look, curious.

They found Bentley in the back room, by his laptop. He waved them over, nodding to the screen. "I just received this message over a private channel." Sly and Murray stood behind him, craning over the turtle's shoulders to see.

 **Am I speaking to the Cooper gang?**

Murray frowned. "How come the username is just a jumble of numbers and letters?"

"It's a disposable account," replied Bentley. "Otherwise, I'd be making an effort to trace it."

"You think it's the leader of the other team?" asked Sly.

"Well, there's one way to find out, isn't there?" said Bentley. "I just wanted to make sure you two were here as well."

Sly and Murray both nodded curtly. Bentley typed a response.

 _You are. And who would you be?_

The reply was almost instant; the other person had been awaiting their message.

 **Suffice to say you and I work in the same field.**

 _You're the one behind the other gang? The one with the voice modulator?_

 **Precisely.**

"Hmm," said Sly. "I don't like this."

"I don't either, Sly," said Bentley, "but let's at least see where this is going."

 **The people of this city have a saying:  
** **Don't unsheathe the claws of war without first offering the paw of peace.**

"I guarantee you no-one actually says that," Sly said.

 **Our recent clash was unfortunate for both parties.**  
 **But in light of our newfound rivalry, I took the liberty to read up on your previous escapades.**  
 **I believe there is a simple solution here.**  
 **You wish to steal something, and have chosen the Nope Diamond; I want the diamond, and have chosen to steal it.**  
 **There is ultimately no actual conflict of interest between us.**

 _Are you suggesting a collaboration?_

 **Indeed.  
You steal the diamond as you planned originally. I would be happy to assist if it makes the operation run more smoothly.  
Once you have succeeded, merely give it to one of my people.  
We can cease this counterproductive antagonism at once.  
However, I warn you:  
t** **here can be no scope whatsoever for you backing out of the deal once you have secured the diamond.  
You understand.**  
 **No honour among thieves, and so forth.**

Bentley paused, then typed _Give us a moment._

 **Naturally. But I must ask that make your response prompt.**  
 **Time is short for all of us.**

Bentley turned his wheelchair around. "Well? What do you guys think?"

"No way," said Sly immediately. "This guy is so fishy I'm pretty sure I can smell him through the computer. We've never teamed up with the likes of him before, and we're not about to start now."

"Totally," agreed Murray. "This sucker's bad news."

"If I may play devil's advocate, it _would_ be nice to not have to worry about the likes of Tai Lung," said Bentley. "And there's the possibility that, if we can get close to the other team, we could double-cross them."

"I doubt it," said Sly flatly. "Knowing this guy – or more accurately, _not_ knowing him – he'll keep us at a distance even if we play his little game... and I'm pretty sure the plan is to double-cross _us_ first. We're relying on the honesty of a nameless, faceless crook plotting evil schemes from a shadowy corner somewhere."

Bentley nodded. "Excellent point. Not to mention the fact we're too low on time and resources to adjust our current plans that much anyway... So, we're in agreement, then? We're rejecting the 'paw of peace'?"

"I do not want this fool's paws anywhere near me," said Murray firmly.

"Uh, ditto," added Sly.

"Very well."

Bentley turned back to the computer. _We've discussed it. We're not interested._

The mastermind didn't reply immediately. After a few seconds, a message came through.

 **You will regret this.**

Then they disconnected.

Silence hung in the room for a few moments.

Then Sly clapped his hands together. "So... let's go steal a subway train!"

"Yeah, alright!"

"I'll begin preparations."

* * *

The sun was setting, casting reds and golds across the clouds. Nick and Judy were standing on the steps outside ZPD Headquarters, each with a coffee in hand.

Judy sighed, smiling to herself. "What a day, huh?"

"Hmm," said Nick. "Yeah."

"...You alright?"

"I'm fine, Carrots. Tired, I guess." Nick paused, sipping his coffee. Judy waited patiently for him to continue; sure enough, he did. "It's just that... we did a lot today, but I don't know how much we actually have to show for it."

"You think so?"

"We have an educated guess as to Scar and Tai Lung's motives. But what good is that? We _need_ proof Scar's involved. We _need_ some way of actually stopping Tai Lung."

"What about Peridot?" asked Judy.

"What _about_ Peridot?" Nick replied flatly. "Point is, we're unprepared."

"I guess that's true," said Judy. She broke into a grin. "But between us, Carmelita, and the rest of the ZPD, Scar doesn't have a chance! It's like you said. We'll get him eventually."

Nick smiled into his coffee. "Your optimism really is something, you know that?" He realised something as he took another sip. "What about Cooper?"

"What _about_ Cooper?" said Judy, one eyebrow raised. Nick chuckled.

Behind them, the main door swung open loudly. They turned around out of curiosity.

Fangmeyer and Wolford – the latter scratching at a bandage on his nose – were escorting the three hyenas out of the building. The trio were in handcuffs and walking in single file; Shenzi at the front, then Banzai, then Ed.

"Hey guys!" called Nick as they passed. "Have fun at your new address!"

Banzai snarled at him, but Shenzi rolled her eyes. "Just ignore him, ya half-wit."

Nick watched them go. "I somehow doubt they're gonna get pardoned by the new Mayor, even if it's Scar," he remarked to Judy. " _Especially_ if it's Scar. Come to think of it, he probably promised to clear their records too. Or, more likely, just said a series of words that implied that."

"That would explain why Shenzi was so tight-lipped," said Judy. She nudged Nick on the arm. "Good thing we had our star interrogator handy, huh?"

"Please," smirked Nick. "Getting Banzai to crack isn't exactly an achievement... but thanks, Carrots."

A lynx with a baseball cap pulled low over her face came out of the ZPD lobby. She clutched an umbrella despite the pleasant weather.

The lynx hurried past Nick and Judy and went down the steps, brushing past Banzai. He yelled suddenly, feeling a sharp pinch. "Hey, watch it, jerk!" The lynx bristled and moved away quickly.

After a few moments, Banzai stopped short, making odd choking noises. Ed walked straight into him, and Shenzi sighed angrily. "What _now_ , you idiot?"

Wolford turned around. "Alright, buddy, enough theatrics. Let's keep – " Suddenly Banzai snarled and jumped forward. He headbutted the wolf right in the nose, eliciting a yelp and an anguished cry of " _Why?!_ "

Fangmeyer's eyes widened. The tiger grabbed Banzai, but he twisted and struggled furiously. "What the hell are you doing?!" yelled Shenzi.

With a sudden move, Banzai knocked Fangmeyer into Ed, and they both fell. Banzai looked around, his eyes wild and animalistic. When he spotted Nick, he roared.

" **You - ! Nick - ! I'll... augh!** "

He ran for Nick, snarling. Nick froze in shock. Judy immediately jumped in front of him, planting her feet and resolutely facing the hyena.

Then Banzai made a noise somewhere in the region of " _gerp_ " and flew forward suddenly, landing with a clatter on the stone steps. The back of his jacket was singed and lightly smoking.

Nick and Judy looked up to see Carmelita across from them. In one hand, she held a huge shock pistol – boxy and red and almost larger than her head. The barrel was still warm.

She strode up, watching Banzai disdainfully. "Hmph. Writhe, little man."

Nick and Judy stared in amazement – almost horror – at Carmelita's weapon. " _That's_ your shock pistol?" choked Judy.

"I thought it was some kind of... box!" said Nick. "I thought you kept handcuffs in that, or something!"

"Oh, this old thing?" said Carmelita modestly, giving the pistol a loving glance. "I've been using it for years. It packs a paralysing punch – and it's my most reliable friend."

Judy shrank a little. "Is it... legal?"

Carmelita laughed. "I see where you're coming from, but yes. Once I cleared the preliminary paperwork, it got approved no problem. It's not even the strangest weapon an agent got through the system; I once knew a constable who somehow managed to get approval to use a whip." She sighed calmly. "You'd be surprised how lax some Interpol regulations are."

" _That explains your midriff-bearing outfit_ ," Nick successfully managed to not say out loud.

"So," said Carmelita, smoothly holstering the pistol while glancing down at Banzai, "this thug was giving you trouble?"

"I think it was... more than that," said Judy worriedly.

"Oh, no," said Nick, eyes wide. "Please tell me you don't think that was – "

"Night Howlers?" said Carmelita.

Both Nick and Judy were taken aback. "You're aware of the Night Howler incident?" asked Nick.

"Of course," said Carmelita. "I read about it passingly when it was breaking news, and I found out more when I was reading your department's files. Rest assured, I'm familiar with the pertinent details."

"Huh," said Judy. "Guess Scar was right about something. Everybody _does_ know about that."

By now Wolford and Fangmeyer had recovered. They jogged up and Carmelita turned briskly to address them. "Officer Wolford, continue escorting the other prisoners. Officer Fangmeyer, properly restrain this idiot and get his blood tested by the lab techs, on the double."

Fangmeyer nodded firmly. "Yes, ma'am!"

Wolford pawed gently at his nose. " _Ugh_... of course, ma'am. Right away."

"Look," said Nick quickly. "I appreciate we need to be careful here, but I'm not entirely sure it was Night Howlers. For one thing, he wasn't fully savage. I've seen what it looks like. That wasn't quite it."

"Yeah," agreed Judy. "If he was still able to form words, then he must've been at least a little bit lucid."

"Plus," continued Nick, "if it _was_ Night Howlers... who dosed him?"

* * *

Peridot broke into a sprint as soon as she heard the yelling.

Her heart was in her throat as she fled. She was _not_ suited for field work – something she had tried to explain to her employer when they tasked her with dosing Banzai at, of all places in the entire city, the front steps of the ZPD.

But it wasn't in Peridot's nature to question the reasoning of her superior. And although her lungs were heaving and her short legs were wobbling and she nearly fell over an embarrassing number of times, she somehow succeeded in slipping away.

She disappeared down a dark alley and leaned against the wall, panting unsteadily. She dropped the modified umbrella and pulled back the green fabric of her sleeve, uncovering a bulky device on her wrist. Although it looked like a watch, it was actually an all-purpose telecommunication apparatus of Peridot's own design, capable of a variety of functions. It could do almost anything a good smartphone could – except, as it happened, tell the time.

Peridot activated it, mentally composing her message to her employer. She needed to inform them that the modified dosage of the serum had the intended effects. To her surprise, however, they had contacted her first. One message was logged on the device.

 **CG refused offer.**  
 **Contact TL.**  
 **Execute imperative: key phrase, "DRAGON CLAW".**

Peridot gulped, and not from exertion.

Not _just_ from exertion.


	9. The Dark Dragon Warrior Rises

Night in the Rainforest District.

It was late; the chaos of the workday was over. All was quiet. On the streets, the bridges, the river, there was no sound except the omnipresent hiss of the artificial rain.

Then a subway train tore through the area, clattering along at high speed. A long chain hung from of the back, rattling along the tracks. The horn sounded twice.

Inside the carriage, Bentley sighed. "Is that really necessary, Murray?"

"Of course it is!" said Sly. "It's the sound of victory."

"Exactly!" called Murray from the driver's section. "How could we steal a subway train and **not** honk the horn?"

"Whatever," said Bentley flatly. "Some discretion might be a good idea, is all."

The trio lapsed into silence. Sly enjoyed the view roaring by. Murray focused on driving, while Bentley began running through his standard equipment checks for after a job.

Sly was thinking " _It feels great to be back in the game. That diamond's gonna be on the mantelpiece in no time._ "

Bentley was thinking " _I'm really starting to worry about Sly. He's been acting odd ever since rejoining the gang, but now it's getting noticeable... and I don't think it's just the influence of a policewoman. I hope he's okay._ "

Murray was thinking " _Oh~oh~oh~oh~ohhhh~! Try Everything! Oh~oh~oh~oh_ **~ _ohhhhhh~! Try Everythi~ing!_** "

They came up to the border between the Rainforest District and Tundra Town. They flew into the tunnel built into the wall, and immediately were plunged into complete darkness.

For a few moments, there was nothing. Then, they were out the other side, back into the gleaming snow – and the roof of the train reverberated with a long bang.

"That... did not sound like hail," said Sly worriedly.

Sly and Bentley tensed, watching the roof carefully, listening out for more sounds. Then a window exploded and a powerful hand grabbed Sly by the shoulder, flinging him out of the train.

The rush of freezing air helped Sly push past the shock and recover. He twisted in mid-air, angling back toward the train, but it was moving too fast. His eyes landed on the chain dangling from the end, and he brought his cane down, hooking it into the links. His feet found the rail and then he was sliding along it gracefully, attached to the train.

" _Where would I be without Tennessee's rail-slide technique?_ " Sly looked up and confirmed his suspicions – Tai Lung was clinging to the side of the train like a giant, deadly barnacle, only instead of a barnacle he was a snow leopard. He was reaching one hand into the carriage in an attempt to reach Bentley.

Judging from his wide grin, he was enjoying himself.

Keeping his feet carefully balanced on the rail, Sly began to climb along the chain back to the carriage. He needed to act fast.

Bentley activated his crossbow and shot a tranquillizer dart at Tai Lung. The leopard caught it between his fingers, and did the same for the second, and the third, and caught the fourth using his thumb. Bentley fired a fifth time and Tai Lung snapped it out of the air with his teeth, then spat it onto the floor.

Bentley tapped the fire mechanism frantically. Nothing came of it except a quiet clicking. "I'm out! I used too many darts at the depot!"

"Then **take the wheel!** " roared Murray. He abandoned the controls and charged at Tai Lung, grabbing his wrist with one hand and punching him squarely in the jaw with the other.

Tai Lung laughed.

Sly was back on the train. Holding his cane in his teeth, he undid the chain's connection, gathering it into his arms. He moved slowly to the side, getting a clear view of Tai Lung – and of a freight train barrelling towards them on the adjacent track.

Sly swung the end of the chain in a circle a few times, building up momentum, and then released it towards Tai Lung. His shot connected, and the chain hooked solidly into Tai Lung's thick belt.

Sly took the other end of the chain in one hand and his cane in the other. The freight train was almost upon them.

He took a breath and then leapt up.

His cane caught a light on the side of the train, and suddenly he was moving in the opposite direction. The chain went taut, and then so too was Tai Lung.

The sharp tug coincided with another strong hit from Murray, knocking the leopard loose. Tai Lung's rolled along the ground for a few seconds before his hand shot out and he grabbed the freight train, pulling himself up.

Sly and Tai Lung both climbed for the roof. Sly put a finger to his ear. "Guys, don't stop. Store the train like we planned, then come back for me in the van. I'll be fine."

"He'll kill you!" yelled Bentley.

"Not if I can help it. Besides," Sly smirked, "I know just who to call for back-up."

Tai Lung was a few carriages down. The leopard had just noticed he was still holding a handful of Bentley's darts, and calmly pocketed them. He glanced up and saw Sly. He snarled and disappeared into the space between the carriages.

Sly watched out for him carefully, but then the train re-entered the tunnel. All light was gone. Sly gripped his cane and stood ready, listening for the sound of movement, but the train beneath him was simply too loud.

The tunnel ended. The train exploded back into the rain. Tai Lung was in front of him.

Sly nodded slowly. "Yeah. I had a feeling you'd do something like that."

"Hello, raccoon," said Tai Lung. "I would be the claw of war."

"Of course," said Sly flatly. "Hey, I'm sure you're eager to... beat me up, or whatever..."

Tai Lung chuckled. "'Beat you up'? Oh, I _admire_ your optimism..."

Sly raised a hand defensively. "Before we get to that, I wanted to take a second to talk to you."

"Talk?" Tai Lung began to move forward at a slight curve, expertly keeping his balance on the swaying, curved roof of the carriage. "I can't imagine you have anything worth saying."

"Yeah, yeah." Sly matched his pace in the opposite direction; they circled each other, the speed of the train whipping raindrops past them. "'I don't like you and you don't like me', and all that. But I don't think we actually have to fight. I want the diamond – but I feel like you're after something else. Something you're relying on your boss to give you after this job." Sly shrugged dramatically. "All I'm saying is, why not turn around, and just take it from him? It'd make both of our lives a lot easier."

Tai Lung laughed. "You think I'm a _fool_?" he said, his face darkening suddenly. "Anything I can take by force is quite easy for me to attain, I assure you. My employer is offering me something a little more abstract." He shook his head. "I suppose I can only expect such simple, materialistic thinking from a petty thief."

" _Petty_ thief?! I'm a **master th** -" Sly took a breath and refocused himself. "Look. All I'm saying is that your employer -"

"- is a mysterious figure who hired me to steal from a public museum without so much as telling me his name? Yes. I'm aware. Don't insult me by thinking I actually trust him." Tai Lung's smile returned. "I'm merely playing along, in the unlikely event he comes through. It's nice to have something to _do_. Besides, I hardly have anything to lose. What could he do to me?"

"So there's no way to talk you down?"

"None whatsoever!" said Tai Lung cheerily. "Here we are, atop a speeding train during a rainy night – a wonderful setting. Stop ruining the atmosphere and let me kill you!"

"... Right," said Sly. He struck a dramatic pose, cane glinting in the half-light – while also subtly reaching into the pouch on his leg. "But I'm warning you – I won't make it easy."

"Oh, I'm sure," smirked Tai Lung. "I'm hoping you'll prove to be at least _something_ of a challenge. But rest assured that the outcome isn't in any doubt – before the sun rises, you wil-" and it was at that point Sly threw down the smoke bomb.

Sly wasted no time and immediately jumped off the train, falling a short distance and landing on something soft.

He glanced around. He was on top of a small red blimp, moored to a tree for the night.

"Huh." He tapped his cane against the fabric of the envelope. "This might do. It's a little on the small side, though. Not that impressive."

A furious roar grabbed his attention. Tai Lung had already spotted him.

Sly leapt off the blimp, landing on a vine and sliding along it.

He took out his phone.

* * *

It was Carmelita's firmly held belief that a person – particularly a police officer – didn't know a city until they drove through it at night, preferably at speed. With this in mind, she and Nick were taking a wide circuit of Zootopia in a ZPD cruiser.

Officially, neither of them acknowledged that Judy Hopps was in the back seat.

Unofficially, Carmelita was regaling them with stories.

"So, the idiot pulls back the veil," she laughed, "and the _look_ on his face when it's me instead of that poor girl he kidnapped... well, it's a precious memory."

Nick was laughing into his paw. "Sounds like quite a wedding!"

"So?" said Judy, eyes bright. "What happened next?"

"Same as usual," said Carmelita casually. She took one hand off the steering wheel to count off on her fingers. "First, the shock pistol. Second, the handcuffs." She sighed, suddenly frowning. "Third, Cooper riding off into the sunset, leaving me with a consolation prize. Again."

"It must be rough," said Nick. "Bogo told us how hard he is to pin down. I don't envy you."

Carmelita shrugged, eyes forward. "I manage."

"Besides," said Judy, "without him, you wouldn't have been able to save that girl in the first place, right?" Carmelita grunted non-committally.

They drove on quietly.

Carmelita was thinking " _I like Nick and Judy, and I have to admit their good humour is infectious... but am I sure I can trust them when the chips are down...?_ "

Nick was thinking " _Carmelita could spend a full hour explaining to me, no, she really **did** want me as her liaison, and I'd _ still _think it's all some misunderstanding. Judy's the obvious choice. She's the hero. She's always so determined – so focused._ "

Judy was thinking " _Oh~oh~oh~oh~ohhhh~! Try Everything! Oh~oh~oh~oh **~ohhhhhh~! Try Everythi~ing!**_ "

The silence was broken by a buzzing in Judy's pocket. She fumbled for her phone. "Oh, sorry!"

"It's fine, Judy," said Carmelita, making a turn.

"Yeah," smirked Nick. "At least you've learned to set it to Vibrate. Real progress. One day soon you might finally discover the 'Silent' mode."

Judy rolled her eyes, then checked to see who was calling her.

Sly.

Judy had a brief but powerful moment of indecision.

Obviously the smart thing was to ignore it, considering who was driving the car. If Sly wanted to tell her something, he would have to settle for a text. He shouldn't be calling her at all, really.

But that was exactly why Judy hesitated. Sly _shouldn't_ be calling.

He probably thought that she was at home, given the late hour. Judging from how laid-back he had been at the park, Judy figured he might have just wanted to talk socially. But something was making her uneasy.

Her train of thought had only taken a few seconds. The phone was on the third ring when she said "Sorry, guys, I should probably take this." Carmelita and Nick murmured their assent.

Judy answered the phone and turned away from them. "Oh hi, _Kevin_ ," she said pointedly, "I can't talk right now, I'm at work."

* * *

"Evening, _Ginny_ ," replied Sly, sprinting over a bridge. "I'm guessing from how we're playing the Fake Names With Weird Emphasis Game that you're with other cops."

* * *

"That's what being at work usually means, yes," said Judy. Carmelita and Nick were watching her in the rear-view mirror – Nick looked suspicious, but he was downplaying it. "I need to go. I'll -"

* * *

"Then tell the _other cops_ that Tai Lung is in the Rainforest District, and he's about to murder Sly Cooper!" Sly glanced backward, just long enough to determine that Tai Lung was indeed still keeping pace, then checked a passing sign. "They're both on a street called Tu-junga. Tu-hunga? There. Tai Lung. Sly Cooper. _Murder_."

* * *

"Ohmygod!" said Judy. "We're on our way! Be careful."

* * *

"I'll do my best," said Sly grimly. "... Thanks."

* * *

The phone clicked. Judy wasted no time. "Tai Lung and Sly Cooper are both in the Rainforest District, Tujunga Street! They're fighting!"

"What?!" yelled Nick.

Carmelita didn't say anything. Instead – with fast, brutal precision – she activated the siren, changed lanes, and slammed a boot on the accelerator. Nick and Judy were both pulled back into their seats.

Nick had thought Judy drove recklessly when chasing a perp – but she drove like his grandmother compared to Carmelita. No opportunity was missed. No second was wasted. Every opening, however small, was seized upon, the cruiser weaving and roaring through traffic like a howling beast. Nick went to use the radio, partly to call back-up, partly to distract himself from how his childhood phobia of roller-coasters was rapidly resurfacing.

But by the time they'd reached the Rainforest District, he still hadn't been able to get a response.

"Clawhauser, come in Clawhauser! Dammit, Ben, pick up!"

The radio's odd silence continued. Suddenly it let out a high-pitched shriek. Nick started, then hurriedly turned it off. "I... don't know what that was."

"I do," said Carmelita, eyes firmly on the road. "Someone is interfering with ZPD signals. Probably to stop us getting to Sly before Tai Lung does." Nick noticed a strange shift in Carmelita's expression. "He's really in danger..." she murmured to herself.

"There!" yelled Judy, pointing out the window. Carmelita and Nick looked up quickly.

Despite the heavy rain and the darkness, there was no doubt; two figures were darting through the trees. One was smaller and wiry, leaping and dancing from vine to vine – the other was far larger, bouncing off buildings and thick tree trunks with movements that were both violent and precise. They were in the distance, moving away from the cruiser. The smaller figure was in the lead, but the distance between them was becoming gradually shorter.

"Damn!" said Carmelita. "They're too high. We can't reach them!"

Judy looked to the figures.

Then, the many vines along the treeline.

Then, the bridge at the end of the road.

Then, the cruiser's sunroof.

"I can," she said.

"Um, what?" said Nick.

Judy undid her seatbelt and reached up, opening the sunroof. Rain instantly spilled into the car. "Head towards that bridge and keep the car steady," she said to Carmelita.

" _What?_ " said Nick.

Carmelita laughed. "You got it!"

" **What?!** " said Nick.

Judy climbed onto the cruiser's roof. The metal was slick with rain, and Judy slipped slightly, but immediately regained her balance.

Carmelita hadn't slowed the car from its breakneck pace. The bridge – and the long fall to the river below – was closer and closer.

" _Judy_!" called Nick. "If you're thinking of doing what I _think_ you're thinking of doing, _**please**_ – !"

"Three seconds!" interrupted Carmelita.

Judy crouched low, legs tensed, ready. The cliff loomed.

Nick couldn't look away.

"Now!" yelled Carmelita.

She broke hard, twisting the cruiser toward the cliff. Judy sprang up, shooting forward with all the car's momentum. She grabbed a vine, then another, then another, flying through the night like a silver bullet, unable to resist the urge to laugh and holler excitedly.

Carmelita watched her go with an awed smile. "Now _that's_ the kind of police work I like to see!"

"Oh my god," Nick whimpered. He rubbed his eyes. "I hate both of you so much."

* * *

Sly was sliding along the wire holding the sky cars, trying to remain focused. At this speed the rain became hazardous, interfering with his vision. Squinting and blinking, he pressed on, unsure of where Tai Lung was.

He suddenly became very sure very quickly when a hand closed around his neck.

He fell, slamming into the metal roof of a sky car, which rocked dangerously on the impact. He managed to turn upwards, but Tai Lung caught him and pinned him down.

"A- **ha!** " roared the leopard. "You lose, raccoon! **Prepare to** -" and then Judy Hopps kicked him in the back of the head.

The three fell over each other and landed haphazardly on a high bridge. Tai Lung rolled away, leaving Judy and Sly with some space.

Sly winced sharply as he sat up. Judy looked him over with concern. "Are you okay?"

Sly gave her a smile. "Been better. Been a lot worse. It's great to see you – even moreso than usual."

Judy raised an eyebrow. "There's no need to flatter me, Mr Cooper."

"Good to know. But maybe I'm choosing to flatter you anyway."

A voice cut in. "Oh good, the _cavalry's_ here." Judy and Sly turned to watch Tai Lung approach them. His footsteps made the bridge sway. "I'm afraid your _novelty_ has worn thin for me. You know, where I come from, rabbits know their place."

Judy stood tall, keeping Sly behind her. "And where _I_ come from, we don't let jerks like you pick on people smaller than them."

Tai Lung shook his head. "This is pathetic. If you honestly want to spend your final moments defending an unrepentant thief, I suppose that's your decision, rabbit. But you'll have time enough to _regret it_."

Judy didn't waver. "As an officer of the ZPD, I save lives. That's my job."

"You have your job. I have **mine!** "

Tai Lung paced toward her furiously, but Judy still didn't move. Instead, she looked him in the eye. "... I read your file. I want to express my sincere condolences for what happened to your father."

Tai Lung stopped short. His voice was soft. "... What?"

"I'm sure my word doesn't mean that much to you – not after so many years," said Judy. "I can't imagine the pain you went through, but I know it must have been crushing. So I'm asking you – not as a police officer, but as someone who knows what it's like to make a mistake – _please_. Don't do this."

Tai Lung exhaled. He looked away, his eyes cast down to the considerable drop to ground level.

"... I'm sorry..." he said quietly.

The rain was relentless.

"I... don't seem to recall..." He looked back at Judy. "...asking for your _worthless pity._ "

Judy balled her hands into fists. "Tai Lung, you are under arrest."

"And you're **in my way!** "

He leapt at her, claws out. Judy jumped up, twisting into a kick -

\- and Tai Lung grabbed her by the neck with a swift motion. She pushed against him, but his grip was too strong. Sly immediately stood, eyes hard.

Tai Lung snarled into Judy's face. "I admit I underestimated you when we first met, but you've lost the element of surprise. No-one gets the better of me more than _once_."

Sly brandished his cane, furious. "Unhand her!"

Tai Lung shrugged genially. "Certainly."

He threw Judy off the bridge.

Tai Lung laughed at Sly's horrified expression. "I was hoping for 'let her go!', but that works too." He watched calmly as Sly dove off the bridge.

Judy flailed in mid-air for a moment, but forced herself to focus. She relaxed her muscles and fanned out her limbs, trying to slow herself. With the correct posture she could minimize her velocity – or, at the very least, kid herself that she had some control over the situation. The trees rushed past her at dizzying speed.

Suddenly an arm wrapped around her, and then she slowed with a abrupt but gentle tug upwards. She looked up to see Sly smirking.

"Seemed like you could use a hand, Judy."

His free hand – the one he wasn't using to hold her against himself – was held upwards, gripping a lightweight blue and white paraglider.

"You just... have that?"

"Oh, it's invaluable."

The paraglider held both of them easily - they floated gently through the trees. Water bounced off the cloth, leaving them in a small bubble, protected from the rain. Despite his thin frame, Sly's grip was surprisingly strong. Judy didn't feel like she was in any danger of falling. She hooked an arm around his shoulders.

"Um... thanks, Sly."

He smiled warmly. "Believe me, it's my pleasure." Judy blinked, unsure of what to say.

Sly steered toward one of the few open spaces in the district; a communal sports field, mostly disused. Its age was clearly evident from the presence of public payphones at one end of the pitch, next to the seating.

They touched down lightly near the middle, the paraglider disintegrating – one-use. Judy turned to Sly, her heart-rate still a little unsteady. "You... saved me."

Sly shrugged. "You saved _me_. That was incredible, by the way. Where did you even come from?"

Judy smiled bashfully. "Just doing my job..."

"'Just' nothing," said Sly. "You're amazing!"

They both went quiet, smiling stupidly at each other – but then Judy's ear twitched, and she looked up. Sly followed her gaze.

Tai Lung was plummeting towards them, fists~first.

"Huh," said Sly. "There goes the moment."

They jumped in opposite directions, dodging Tai Lung's meteoritic entrance. Dirt and grass exploded outwards as he landed.

Tai Lung slowly unfurled to his full height, looking from Sly to Judy and back again. "Alright, children. Amateur hour is officially _over_. You were entertaining distractions, but it's time to finish this."

"I agree," said Sly. "It _is_ time to finish this. And I'm very entertaini-"

Tai Lung shot forward, closing the distance between him and Sly in an instant.

Sly retreated, nimbly dodging Tai Lung's grasping hands. "What? You're not even gonna let me finish my-"

Tai Lung managed to grab his shoulder, then abruptly jabbed two fingers into Sly's chest. Sly stiffened unnaturally, breath catching in his throat.

He fell.

Judy watched in horror as Sly landed in the mud, unmoving, fingers locked around his cane and face frozen in surprise.

Tai Lung loomed over Sly's body. "No. I'm not."


	10. The Dark Dragon Warrior Falls Over Again

The rain was still pounding, leaving the ground of the sports field soft and muddy.

Judy stared at Sly, unmoving in the dirt. He was unnaturally still. In the darkness, she wasn't even sure he was breathing.

She turned to Tai Lung, the horror in her eyes solidifying into anger. Determination. "What did you do to him?!"

"Oh, relax," said Tai Lung. "He's fine. Conscious, even. Isn't that right, raccoon?" He poked Sly with his foot.

Sly did nothing.

"Suppose you'll have to take my word for it," said Tai Lung with a bright smile. "But he _is_ still aware of everything. That'll make it much funnier when I throw him in a river, wouldn't you say? Perfectly cognisant of his inescapable, suffocating death..."

Judy shook with anger. "That's –! You're abhorrent!"

Tai Lung shrugged calmly. "I suppose my sense of humour often doesn't translate." He chuckled. "Besides, I can hardly expect you to find it that amusing... when you'll be _next to him_."

Judy tensed, readying herself. "I'm not afraid of you!" she said fiercely.

Tai Lung's smile didn't fade. "I don't care."

He lunged.

* * *

With the radio still malfunctioning and Carmelita focused entirely on the road, Nick was left to stew in his fears. Leaping over a ravine from a speeding car during heavy rainfall had seemed impossibly dangerous to him, but Judy had done it with ease. Of course she had. She was Judy.

It was what came next that Nick couldn't stop worrying about.

He was jolted out of his reverie when Carmelita made a sharp turn with no warning. "Look alive, Wilde. We have a lead."

Carmelita had swerved to a follow a van which was driving just as recklessly as she was. It had a stylised raccoon face emblazoned on the back doors.

"Is that -?"

"Yes," she said. "Tracking Sly by GPS, no doubt. They'll lead us right to them."

Nick swallowed. "Right..."

"Nick." Carmelita's eyes remained hard, focused on the road, but there was a warmth in her voice. "Judy's going to be fine. Trust me."

Nick paused, then managed a weak smile. "Thanks, Carmelita."

The van shrieked to a stop on a small hill overlooking the sports field. Murray and Bentley exited, grabbing their Binocucoms to get a better view.

Carmelita slammed on the brake, the cruiser stopping just next to the van. She hopped out, shock pistol in hand. Nick followed suit, although he couldn't help but feel his standard-issue weapon was useless compared to Carmelita's bazooka of dubious legality.

Carmelita strode up. "Freeze, you two!" They turned in surprise – and then, to Nick's bafflement, smiled with relief.

"Carmelita! Hey!"

"It's good to see you. We could really use your help."

Nick blinked. "Um... what?"

"Stand down for now, Nick," said Carmelita, although she didn't seem nearly as enthusiastic about the reunion. "This isn't the first time the Cooper Gang has coming running to me with their tails between their legs after getting into more trouble than they could handle."

"I would've... phrased it differently," said Bentley, "but yes."

"Guys, Sly looks hurt!" yelled Murray, who had turned back to the fight. "That bunny's giving Tai Lung a real workout, though!"

Nick squinted, his night vision compensating for the distance. Sure enough, a tiny grey blur was darting around, staying out of the reach of a far larger, angrier grey blur. She was fine. She was still moving. Nick let out a breath he hadn't realized he'd been holding.

Neither Judy nor Tai Lung had noticed them. Nick considered calling out, but quickly discarded the idea. He couldn't afford to distract her.

Judy must have said something, because Tai Lung abruptly stopped. Nick couldn't make out the words, but the leopard replied, gesturing to some odd object in the dirt behind him. Nick didn't realise it was Sly until he noticed the cane, golden metal still shining in the darkness.

Judy hesitated. Then she resumed moving. However, Tai Lung was following her less closely. Waiting.

Judy suddenly made a dash for Sly. Tai Lung, on cue, struck her as she passed.

She fell.

She didn't get up.

Nick started. "What happened?! What was that?!"

Bentley lowered his Binocucom. "I heard rumours about this while researching Tai Lung's background," he said gravely. "This seems to be his infamous paralysis technique."

"There wasn't any mention of that in his files," said Carmelita.

Bentley grimaced. "That's probably because by the time he's angry enough to use it... the victim doesn't make it to a hospital."

"It's _fatal?!_ " yelped Nick.

"No, no," said Bentley quickly. "Not by itself. But Sly and Hopps are completely defenceless. We need to act fast!"

"Good," said Carmelita. "That means you don't have time to question my orders. Murray, you're up."

He nodded. "I'm all ears!"

"Approach from the side and stay out of sight. Once I make an opening, extract Sly and Judy and bring them here. After that, run interference. I don't want Tai Lung getting too close to me, for obvious reasons. Keep the pressure on. Our best chance is to keep him off-balance."

"Al _ **right!**_ " yelled Murray enthusiastically. "We haven't had a chance to team up since we fought El Tigre Chino. Between the two of us, we'll save them for sure!"

Carmelita glared. "Let's get one thing clear; I'm only 'saving' Judy. I'm _arresting_ Sly. The second Tai Lung goes down, _so do you_. Understand?"

Murray blinked in surprise. He and Bentley shared an look, but Bentley quickly said "Of course. Whatever you say." Murray was still frowning uncertainly as he jogged away.

"What do you want me to do?" asked Bentley.

Carmelita smiled thinly. "This."

Then there was a clamp on one of his wheels.

Bentley raised an eyebrow. "Did you just boot my wheelchair...?"

"I don't need your help stopping Tai Lung, and I _certainly_ don't need you getting any ideas." She turned to Nick. "Keep an eye on him – and be careful. He's more devious than he looks."

"I'm supposed to just stay here?!" said Nick.

"Yes," said Carmelita bluntly. "Make sure Judy and Sly are okay. And Nick, listen to me – if something goes wrong, put them in the car and drive straight to headquarters. Do not slow down. Do not look back. Alright?"

Nick stuttered. "What –?! But – I'm a cop too!"

"Then take an order like one!" snapped Carmelita. "I am _ordering_ you to stay here, where it's safe! Now do you trust me or not?"

Nick stared at her for a moment, then nodded. "... Yeah. I trust you."

"Good to know." She turned and stalked toward Tai Lung. "This'll only take a second."

Tai Lung was casually strolling, dragging Sly along by one foot. He held Judy by the ears. "So," he said, "you know this city. Any recommendations for a nice place to drown?"

Judy said nothing.

Tai Lung smiled. "In that case, I suppose the nearest muddy ditch will do."

" _Freeze!_ "

Tai Lung stopped and slowly turned, more curious than surprised. Carmelita was standing a few feet away, shock pistol trained on him.

"Tai Lung," she said. "This is your only warning. Unhand both of them and put your hands up."

"Did I just hear you correctly?" said Tai Lung with an amused smile. "' _Both_ '? I assume you're some kind of officer, so I can see why you'd want the rabbit... but the thief? Surely he's as good to you dead as he is in a cell. Better, even. Less of a drain on the taxpayer," he added sardonically.

"No-one is dying here tonight," said Carmelita. "Besides... that criminal is _mine_."

"'Yours'?" Tai Lung sagged dramatically. "Oh, good lord. At this rate I wouldn't be surprised if Cooper's seduced half the policewomen on the planet!"

"Neither would I," said Carmelita icily. "But I'm not about to leave him to die. I'm stopping you right here."

" _You_?" Tai Lung chuckled. He turned conspiratorially to Judy. "Her?" he asked mockingly, nodding toward Carmelita. "She's a fox. You're a fox! What are you going to do, love, sell me a bridge?"

"No," said Carmelita. "I'm going to arrest you."

Tai Lung barked out a laugh. "Oh! Of course! How could I have missed that? _Obviously_ you'll arrest me. It's not like you're a fraction of my size. It's not like you're an insignificant insect before me. It's not like you're just an idiotic little vixen who clearly has no idea she is dealing with the _greatest kung fu master_ **of all ti** -"

Carmelita shot him in the face.

The blast of electricity exploded against him, his eyes screwing up in pain. " **Agh!** Dear _god_ , right in the nose!" He gave her a look of genuine surprise. "How could yo-"

Carmelita shot him in the face again.

Tai Lung dropped his hostages to clutch at his maw. Murray jumped in from the side. He grabbed Sly and Judy and sprinted for the cars, unburdened by their comparatively small weights. It felt odd to run _away_ from a cool fight, but he knew his priorities.

Tai Lung recovered, snarling at Carmelita. He dove for her – and Carmelita leapt backwards, far faster and higher than he had anticipated. She landed neatly on the railing of the seating area. Then she shot him in the face.

He roared and jumped at her again – and she jumped too, passing over him with a tight front-flip. She landed, turned on her heel, and shot him in the back of the head.

Nick stared. "Holy crap."

"Yep," said Bentley.

Murray arrived. He carefully lay Sly and Judy against the police cruiser – on the opposite side from the battle, just to be safe – and then turned around and charged back into the fray.

Nick looked Judy up and down. Her absolute stillness was terrifying. "Please please please please..." He checked her pulse, first at the neck, then the wrists to be thorough. Oddly slow, but definitely there. He leaned in close, listening intently. He felt a slight movement of air. Breath.

Nick heaved a sigh of relief. He felt heavy. He leaned against the cruiser, one hand over his face, trying to get a hold of himself.

"Uh..."

Nick started at the sound. He looked up to see Bentley watching him, somewhat bemused.

"Do you mind checking on Sly, too?" he asked.

Nick nodded. "Sure. Fine." He ran through the same procedures for Sly. He was okay, too – for a certain definition of 'okay.'

Carmelita never stopped moving, keeping just ahead of Tai Lung. He was relentless. She was forced to stop firing and focus entirely on defence. She needed an opening.

That opening arrived when – just as Tai Lung made a successful feint and almost grabbed her – Murray exploded in, wrapping his arms around Tai Lung's neck and pulling him to the ground.

Carmelita shot Tai Lung in the face.

Tai Lung growled. He jumped up, easily breaking Murray's hold. "Two on one, hmm? Easily remedied!" As Murray stood, he jabbed two fingers into the hippo's stomach.

They bounced off.

Tai Lung blinked. Again, he jabbed his fingers into Murray's stomach – again, to no avail.

"No!" he yelled. "Not this nonsense!"

"Sorry, chum," yelled Murray, "but it seems **The Murray's** bodacious bod is immune to your puny paralysis!"

Tai Lung's eye twitched.

Then he punched Murray, sending him flying into the opposite set of stands.

As Carmelita resumed shooting Tai Lung in the head, Murray refocused himself. "Man, this guy's not in a chipper mood."

Bentley heard him over the comms. "Well, good. The angrier he is, the better."

"Excuse me?!" said Nick. "How, exactly, do you suppose making the assassin _angry_ is a good idea?"

"It's our gang's go-to tactic for psychological warfare," said Bentley evenly. "We've dealt with a lot of people like this over the years. There's always something that'll set them off – and when they're irritated, they start to make mistakes. It's one of our unspoken rules; 'when in doubt, annoy the other guy as much as possible.'"

Nick scoffed. "I thought you guys were supposed to be professionals. Irritating someone is like kicking down the door when you could've picked the lock. It's the blunt stick of con artistry."

"Well, you would know, wouldn't you?"

Nick hid his sudden pang of anxiety under indignation. "What's _that_ supposed to mean?!"

Bentley didn't answer immediately. Carmelita's behaviour – her willingness to team up despite an obvious lack of the fondness she'd once shown for them – indicated to him that police back-up was delayed. However, it would arrive eventually. The Cooper Gang needed to leave as soon as possible – and seeing the way Nick hunkered protectively over Judy made the way forward obvious.

"Listen, Nick -"

"'Officer Wilde'," snapped Nick.

"Of course. Officer Wilde, listen to me. We don't know anything about the long-term effects of this paralysis. We can't afford to waste time. Judy needs help now."

Nick smiled bitterly. "Your concern for _Officer Hopps_ is noted. It's a good thing Inspector Fox is handling the situation," he said, just as Carmelita whacked Tai Lung in the nose with the side of her pistol. She followed this by shooting him in the face.

"Carmelita's a force of nature," agreed Bentley. "I don't doubt that she could beat Tai Lung. But we both know he's no push-over. She'll stop him, but it could take an hour. Two. It could be dawn before one of them gives up." His glasses glinted through the darkness. "... Are you prepared to risk that?"

Nick hesitated. He knew the smart thing to do was ignore Bentley and focus on his orders – but it was late and it had been such a trying day and Judy was laying there like a _corpse_...

He sighed angrily. "What do you suggest?"

"Clearly, we need to get Tai Lung to retreat," said Bentley. "But I'm afraid I've yet to solidify a specific plan."

Nick bit his lip. He tore his eyes away from Carmelita, dodging Tai Lung's sweeping claws. His gaze landed on the public payphones at the corner of the pitch.

"You're good with technology, right?"

"I like to think so," said Bentley drily.

"Prove it," said Nick. "I have an idea."

Tai Lung punched Murray in the chin, hard enough to disorient him. He turned to Carmelita just in time to get shot in the face.

He snarled and leapt at her, and she jumped backwards into the stands. Tai Lung slammed into the seating, crushing several decaying plastic chairs, but he lost sight of Carmelita. "Where are you?!"

Behind him, the shock pistol poked out from under a seat. It shot him in the side of the head.

He roared, his rage primal. With one kick he dislodged the entire row of seating, exposing Carmelita. She was surprised, but recovered quickly – just not quickly enough. As she jumped away Tai Lung's fist caught her, knocking her back into the pitch.

She landed roughly and growled her defiance – until she realized her pistol was some distance away. She and Tai Lung both ran for it, and he was almost there when Murray jumped in, pulling him back by the shoulders.

"Enough!" Tai Lung cracked his head back, hitting Murray in the nose. He broke free, shouted with fury, and kicked him across the pitch. Murray slammed into one of the payphones. The machine juddered slightly but didn't break.

A shot of electricity to the head seized Tai Lung's attention. He turned to Carmelita, gritted his teeth, and ran. He took one, two, three more shots directly to the face and suddenly leapt, closing the distance. He grabbed her by the neck with one hand and twisted her firing-arm away with the other.

"I will make **your death** _**agonizing!**_ " he bellowed.

" **Try it, Snowflake!** " Carmelita yelled, kicking him in the stomach.

Then the phone rang.

They both looked up despite themselves. One of the payphones at the end of the pitch was ringing, its shrill tone a clear sign of age.

Murray picked himself up. "Don't worry, guys! I'll get it." He took the receiver. " **The Murray** speaking. How can I help ya?"

" **Quick question** ," rumbled the phone. " **Does my voice sound all deep and scary?** "

"Um... yeah?"

" **Great! Be a pal and put me on to Tai Lung.** "

"Oh...! Okay." Murray turned from the phone. "It's for you."

Tai Lung blinked. " _What_?"

"It's for you, man! Someone with a crazy deep voice. Sounds like a giant robot or something."

"Hmm," said Tai Lung. He casually flung Carmelita aside. She braced herself and rolled on impact, growling to herself.

Tai Lung stalked up to the phone and knocked Murray away. He took the receiver. "What?"

Behind the Cooper Gang's van, Nick steeled himself. A deep breath would probably be picked up by his cell phone, tightly held against his face. Instead, he closed his eyes for a moment, then spoke.

" **Tai Lung** ," the voice purred, " **that's enough.** "

"...Excuse me?" said Tai Lung. "' _Enough_ '?"

" **Indeed. That will be sufficient. You may leave.** "

Tai Lung gave the payphone an incredulous look, as though expecting the machine to apologise. "But... I haven't killed anyone yet!"

" **Well, yes. I'm aware.** "

"Oh, you are, are you?" said Tai Lung, suspicion creeping into his voice. He looked to Murray, standing awkwardly nearby, and Carmelita, training her pistol on him from the stands. Then he squinted into the darkness, vaguely making out two vehicles. "... And just how _do_ you know that?"

Nick was prepared.

" **The traffic cameras, of course. Peridot gained access to them. I followed your little performance all throughout the district. Most impressive, but as I say.** _**Sufficient.**_ "

Nick heard Tai Lung huff out a sigh. Apparently, his impression of Scar was suitably convincing. As it happened, it wasn't very difficult for Nick put on a snide and condescending air.

Tai Lung leaned an elbow onto the payphone. "Just give me a few more minutes, and I'll have killed them all."

" **Those aren't my orders.** "

"Yes, well," said Tai Lung, shooting a glare at Carmelita, "I would very much like to kill them all anyway. Consider it _pro bono_."

" **I won't repeat myself. That isn't necessary. All you need do is ensure the Cooper Gang are arrested.** "

Bentley gave Nick a withering look. " _Bite me!_ " Nick mouthed silently.

"I'm getting pretty tired of you changing your plans like this, you know," growled Tai Lung. "What's stopping me from killing them anyway?"

Nick took the stab of fear in his chest and turned it to anger, pouring as much malice into his words as possible.

" **Leave immediately... or you can consider our little contract** **_terminated_.** "

"Is that so?" drawled Tai Lung. "Just so we're clear... what exactly would that contract _be_ , again?"

If Tai Lung was suspicious enough to question a direct order, Nick couldn't afford to think about his answer – hesitation would be more than enough proof he wasn't the mastermind. It was time to make an educated guess.

" **Really, now. I didn't expect you to forget something so basic. You get me the diamond; I clear your record and get you a real job. Must I write that down for you?** "

Tai Lung sighed through his teeth. "... No. I understand. I'll withdraw."

" **Good.** "

Nick cut the call off abruptly. He felt that was in-character.

Tai Lung carefully, delicately, hung up the receiver.

Then he roared and ripped the entire apparatus straight out of the ground, flinging it into the stands.

He looked up sourly. Murray was still only a few feet away.

The hippo smiled awkwardly. "Um... bad news...?"

Tai Lung leapt towards him, snarling. He jabbed at Murray's stomach almost instinctively, forgetting his earlier failures – and Murray yelled out " _Hurk!_ " and fell stiffly to the ground.

Tai Lung glanced confusedly between his fingers and the hippo. Then he scoffed quietly. "Oh, of course. _Now_ it works."

He turned to meet Carmelita's unwavering gaze. "Luck is with you tonight, vixen," he snarled, "but heed my words; when our paths meet next, I swear I shall wreak a great and terrible ve-" and Carmelita shot at him again.

Tai Lung had finally learned – he dodged to the side. He roared at her, both as a threat and out of frustration. Then he turned and ran.

Carmelita growled. "Get back here, you scum!" She sprinted past Murray – who cracked an eye open as she passed. He quickly scrambled to his feet and ran for the van.

Nick exhaled, wiping his forehead. He slipped his phone back into his pocket.

"Impressively done, Officer Wilde," said Bentley. "I see your reputation is well-deserved."

"Don't patronize me. You and your friends aren't going anywhere."

"Oh, believe me. You'll know when I'm patronizing you," said Bentley. "Unrelatedly: what's this thing?"

Nick glanced up, eyes tired, and whatever the thing was, it exploded into blinding white light.

Nick yelled in pain – and anger. His eyes screwed shut, he moved forward, clawing at Bentley.

Then he felt a large fist close around the back of his shirt collar. His paws left the ground. Nick struggled and swung, grabbing hold of the thick arm that held him up, but there was nothing he could do to break free.

He was placed – with surprising gentleness – on what felt very much like the backseat of the cruiser: leather, damp with rainwater. He began to crawl out of the car, but the door slammed, the sound too loud for his sensitive ears. He fumbled for the handle, but the door didn't yield. By the time he'd coaxed it open, his sight and Carmelita had almost returned.

She jogged up to him. "Nick! Are you alright?"

Nick groaned. "God... right in the night vision..."

He squinted around. Judy was still propped up where they'd left her – _thank god_ – but the Cooper Gang were long gone.

He winced. "Carmelita, I'm so sorry! I let them -"

Carmelita held up a hand. The anger was gone from her – she seemed smaller now. "Don't apologise, Nick. It's my fault. I should've come back here to help you, instead of... losing my temper. The Cooper Gang have escaped from a lot more than a single rookie fox. You did well." She managed a smile. "Excellently, in fact. Am I right in thinking that was you on the phone? It seems you have a talent for impressions."

Nick shrugged at the ground. "Well, impressions are easy when you have a voice modulator. Which I guess I need to thank Bentley for." He blinked a few more times, mouth twisted in discomfort. "Not that I feel especially grateful right now..."

"I know the feeling," muttered Carmelita. "But forget about them. Judy still needs help. Any ideas?"

Nick thought for a moment. "... I know a guy."

Carmelita smirked. "Why does that not surprise me?"

"We'd better get going." Nick sighed heavily. "God... today has been so _long_."

"Well, Nick," said Carmelita, "tomorrow's another day."

"Yeah... but it could be _worse_."


	11. Weak Lynx

" _Good morning, Zootopia. I'm Fabienne Growley._ "

" _I'm Peter Moosebridge. This is the Morning Report._ "

" _Our top story this morning: merely two days after a similar skirmish during the delivery of the Nope Diamond, there are eyewitness reports of a violent altercation between two individuals, this time in the Rainforest District. Minor property damage was incurred throughout the area, though no injuries have been reported._ "

" _The ZPD has confirmed the identities of both men to the public; Sly Cooper, internationally-renowned thief, and Tai Lung, a known criminal. Chief Bogo has stated that his department is maintaining control of the situation, but has also appealed for any information on the whereabouts of either. T'Challa Okonkwo, curator of the Natural History Museum, has reiterated his assurances that the Nope Diamond is entirely safe._ "

" _In other news: further controversy in the municipal election, after one of 'Scar' Kifalme's campaign staff claimed it was unlikely that fellow candidate Toriel Dreemurr could balance being a good mayor with being a good mother. Kifalme refused to comment on the remark. Dreemurr, who has begun to make gains in the polls, stated that no candidate should, quote, 'tolerate such insubor-_ "

Nick knocked gently on the living room door. Judy grabbed the remote and muted the television.

"Hey, Carrots. Anything else I can do for you?"

From the mountain of pillows, cushions and blankets on the couch, Judy made a show of rubbing her chin. "Let's see... aside from breakfast in bed, every soft object in the house, and bringing me to the only acupuncturist in the Rainforest District still open for business past 10pm..."

"The _best_ acupuncturist in the Rainforest District still open for business past 10pm," corrected Nick. "I know of at least two others."

"Of course. Aside from all that... no. I think I can survive."

Nick drifted into the room. "Believe me, your survival is my main concern."

"Kinda got that impression, yeah. You really went the extra mile." Judy flopped against the pillows, arms outstretched. "I should almost die more often!"

"I sense my plan has backfired," said Nick flatly.

Judy's smirk faded into something less humorous – something more genuine. "Really, Nick. Thanks. For everything."

He shrugged at the television. "Hey, don't sweat it. Just looking after my partner."

"Well, I appreciate it. A lot." She repositioned herself slightly. "And I'll be sure to pay you back whenever a kung fu murderer paralyses you."

Nick laughed gently. "Good to hear. You already know how I like my toast, so..."

Nick did a slow lap of the room, glancing around for anything that needed attending to. Judy sat in silence, enjoying the sunny view through the window. Cypress Grove Lane was a quiet area of town, fitting with its arboreal name, but the skyscrapers of the city centre loomed impressively in the distance. It was one of her favourite things about Nick's place.

Nick determined that there was nothing else he could distract himself with. Resigning himself, he came up to the couch. "Uh... hate to spoil the mood, but there's something I need to ask you."

"Go ahead!"

He sat on the armrest, frowning at the window. He paused for a moment before speaking.

"Hopps... who's 'Kevin'?"

Judy tried to maintain her smile despite her nervousness. "What?" she said innocently.

"There's nobody in this city you know that I don't," said Nick, "and I don't know any Kevins you'd be close to." He turned to her. "So who called you last night?"

"Oh... well, see, Kevin is... ah..." Judy took one look at Nick – his eyes unusually serious – and immediately relented. "It was Sly," she sighed.

"Mmh. Thought so." Nick pinched the bridge of his nose. "So, what? He has your personal number now? How does this fit with our agreed plan to _not_ mess around with master thieves?"

"It wasn't messing around, Nick!" protested Judy. "It was important! Together, we stopped Tai Lung!"

"Yeah, we did," said Nick, anger rising. "We _stopped_ Tai Lung. We didn't arrest him or anything. No. We 'stopped' him. The only person who benefited from us sticking our necks out was Cooper!"

"Nick, come on! It was attempted murder! He was in danger!"

"And then _so were you!_ " Nick snapped. He caught himself, turning away for a moment. After a deep breath, he continued. "Look. What if this isn't an isolated incident? What if he calls you every time he gets into more trouble than he can handle?"

Judy shifted. "I guess I can see your point..." She tried a grin. "But that just means we'll always know where the bad guys are, right?"

Nick didn't look impressed with her reasoning.

As Judy's grin died awkwardly, she realised something. "Um... are you going to tell Carmelita about this...?"

Nick sighed. "I... guess not," he said eventually. "Let's just hope it doesn't come up. I really don't like the idea of lying to her, but I also really don't like the idea of watching her throw you in a cell."

"Well, it's not like I've broken the law..."

"Maybe not technically, but you're really not doing yourself any favours here. When Carmelita finds out – _if_ Carmelita finds out... I wouldn't be surprised if –"

Nick was interrupted by a buzzing in his pocket. He took out his phone and checked who was calling him.

Carmelita.

He yelped. "Oh god, she already found out!"

Judy threw a pillow at him. "Oh, get a grip, you dumb fox. See what she wants."

Nick nodded. After a moment to steady himself, he answered. "Hey, good morning. What's up?"

He smiled. "Oh yeah, she's doing fine. Don't worry." He looked up, and Judy gave him a little wave. "She's... actually waving at me right now, as though you can see her. So tragically, she's fully recovered to her old, dorky self. Oh, now she's sticking her tongue out at me. Truly the image of professionalism, as ever."

Carmelita's reply made him chuckle. "Yeah, that's true." Slowly, his smile faded. He listened intently for a while, then spoke. "I see. Alright, I'll be in as soon as I can. Yeah. See you there. Bye."

"That sounded kinda serious," said Judy, as Nick pocketed his phone and stood up.

"Afraid so. Clawhauser looked into our computer systems, and there's evidence that the whole thing's been comprised by a hacker."

"Oh, no."

"Yeah. That's probably why our radios were busted last night. Obviously, we need to sort this out. Carmelita's overseeing getting everything patched up again, and she wants me to lend a hand."

Judy nodded. "Okay! Just let me put on my uniform, and I'll be right - "

"Here," said Nick. He leaned in and gently pushed her deeper into the pillow-mountain. " _Riiiight_ here. In your uniform, if you want. Whatever makes you comfortable. I'm honestly surprised you don't sleep in it."

"Come on, Nick! I'd be happy to pitch in!"

Nick sighed, hands on his hips. "Yeah, I know. That's kind of the problem. You don't have an off-switch, Carrots. I admire your dedication, I really do, but you gotta take it easy some time. After what happened last night, no-one would mind if you took the day off."

"But _I'd_ mind," protested Judy. "I don't care if Bogo himself told me to go home – if the department's in trouble, I want to help!"

Nick paused. "What about me?"

"What?"

"Would you take the day off I asked nicely?"

Judy folded her tiny, adorable arms. "Under _protest_..." She let out a sigh. "...but, yeah. I owe you, anyway."

"Thanks, Carrots. I don't want to force you into doing something you don't want to, but... well, I think you've earned some free time by now."

Judy found it hard to stay mad at him, and soon she was returning his quiet smile. After a few moments Nick slid off the armrest. "Well, I better get ready. You take it easy, alright, Carrots?"

"I'll try!" said Judy.

Nick clicked the door shut, and Judy heard him jog upstairs. She sank into the couch, frowning uncertainly.

"I'll _try_..."

* * *

Mr Okonkwo was in his office, squinting at Doctor Solus' scrawled report on the Nope Diamond. Despite its rather dramatic entrance to Zootopia, the gem was no worse for wear. Diamonds were the hardest naturally-occurring substance, after all. All it needed was a bit of aesthetic work – cleaning, polishing, things of that nature. The exhibit would proceed exactly as planned.

Okonkwo smiled to himself. Always so nice when a plan came together.

There were two brisk knocks on his office door.

"Who's there?" called Okonkwo.

The door creaked open. One purple eye gleamed in the darkness, glancing around the office. "You busy, boss?"

"No moreso than usual. Please."

O'Donnell, Okonkwo's newest employee, stepped inside. He was a tall grey wolf – ex-military, currently specialising in private security. One hand was in the pocket of his dark blue jacket; the other idly scratched at his face, just under the eyepatch over his left eye.

Okonkwo watched him calmly. "How are preparations proceeding?"

"Good, good," drawled O'Donnell, looking over Okonkwo's many bookshelves with vague interest. "Alarms are all rigged up. Finally got that... dart-gun thing to shoot straight, and today I'll be running some drills to make sure the guards are ready for tomorrow night. Everything's on track."

"Excellent..." Okonkwo laid down the report and steepled his fingers. "But you wouldn't have come here unless you had something to tell me."

O'Donnell chuckled, a hoarse sound in the back of his throat. "Perceptive, boss. Very perceptive. As it happens, there's something I've been meaning to, ah..."

Okonkwo gestured to one of the two chairs facing his desk. O'Donnell took one and turned it around before sitting down, purely because he was the kind of person to sit in a chair facing the wrong way.

He smiled blandly at Okonkwo, arms folded over the back of the chair. He spoke slowly. "You know why I took this gig? I figured it might be a good change of pace. A museum – nice and quiet. Easy. I even agreed to your price, despite the fact it was considerably _below_ what I'd usually accept, because you're a public museum and it's _such_ an _important_ exhibit, yadda yadda, _kumbaya_."

"I'm sensing a 'but'," said Okokwo flatly.

" _But_ ," said O'Donnell, jabbing a finger at Okonkwo, "that was _before_ two of the most infamous criminals on the planet had themselves a little tussle in your delivery van. Word is they were at it again last night. And unfortunately, they haven't killed each other yet. Your museum's still in a lot of trouble. Cooper and his boys are damn near impossible to stop – and compared to Tai Lung, they're kids playing dress-up. I'd rather be pickpocketed than beaten to death," he sniffed.

"Do you require more resources? Co-operation with the ZPD, perhaps?"

"No," scoffed O'Donnell. "You wanted the best, and you got it. But the best ain't cheap. Not with guys like that lurking around. The guards are starting to worry... and they can't work to their best when they're _worried_ , can they?" His smile returned – now slightly predatory. For lack of a better word, wolfish. "So I'm gonna need you to to sign off on a much higher fee. For morale purposes, y'see."

Okonkwo's eyebrow raised slightly, almost unnoticeably. "And are these funds to be paid through your account?"

"Standard managerial rates apply," said O'Donnell simply, inspecting his claws.

Okonkwo sighed. "I appreciate the guards' concerns," he said finally, "and I wouldn't want them to work under such stress. I can offer a raise of thirty percent."

"Thirty percent!? Try double what you're currently paying. That'd be a good place to _start_."

"As you say, this is a public museum. We simply don't have those kinds of funds."

O'Donnell's eye narrowed. "Maybe you _would_ if you spent more money on security and less on fancy lights."

"If you're referring to the lobby's new chandelier, that purchase was finalised before the Nope Diamond was even discovered," said Okonkwo levelly. "I assure you that I have carefully plotted the expenses for this exhibit, and the diamond is entirel-"

"Save your breath. I watch the news," growled O'Donnell. "You can repeat that line of yours all you like. It doesn't make it true. And it doesn't mean anyone else shares your confidence."

"I appreciate that. But financially, my hands are tied. I cannot offer the money you're requesting."

For a moment, O'Donnell held Okonkwo's calm gaze with a glare. Then he sighed and stood up slowly. "I understand, boss. The cash just isn't there." He rolled his shoulders. "... You can forget I said anything."

"I won't," said Okonkwo. "I'll approve that thirty percent raise as soon as possible. Tell the guards I'm sorry I can't offer more."

O'Donnell smiled. "That's real nice of you." He went to leave. "I'm gonna get back to work. I'll keep you posted on anything that might need your attention."

"Please do."

The door clicked shut. Okonkwo watched it warily for a moment, then returned to his work.

* * *

An angry buzzing reverberated through Peridot's darkened apartment, startling her. She hurriedly paused the cartoon she was watching illegally online, then pushed off her desk, sliding her office chair over to where she'd left her communication device.

One message.

 _open the window before i break it_

Peridot gulped. She hopped out of her chair and ran to the room's only window, covered by a dark curtain. She pulled it back – squinting crabbily at the light – and fumbled the latch open.

She scampered back to her chair, mentally preparing herself for what was to come.

Behind her, Tai Lung squeezed himself through the window. He tugged the curtain closed behind him. He stood in the centre of the room, dominating the small space without especially trying.

Peridot took a breath. "Yyyyyou have some explaining to do!" she said, in what she hoped was an intimidating tone. "Our employer is furious!"

Tai Lung leaned against a desk. He took the handful of Bentley's darts out of his pocket, passing them through his fingers. "Is that so?" he said, not looking up.

Peridot blinked, then forced herself to keep pressing on. "Yes! Yes they are! Your instructions were very clear, and yet somehow you were duped into letting the targets escape! How were you even fooled so easily?!"

Tai Lung examined the darts calmly. "What can I say? The facade was suitably convincing. I had more than adequate reason to believe it was really him on the phone." He tossed the darts aside. They landed on one of Peridot's less-cluttered desks, amongst her gemstone collection. "You know, this could have been easily avoided," he said, his tone beginning to darken. "I wouldn't have been fooled by some nobody with a false voice if I hadn't been taking orders this whole time from _some nobody with a false voice._ "

Peridot bristled. "Our employer is _not_ a nobody!"

"But he _is_ too mysterious for his own good," countered Tai Lung. "Had he trusted me with some small token... for instance, his name, face, _or voice_ , perhaps I wouldn't be so easily led astray. Surely this irritates you as well? Taking orders from a man who refuses to tell us anything about himself?"

"It's... necessary," said Peridot, carefully choosing her words. "They have to remain anonymous in order to protect themselves."

Tai Lung scoffed. "Sounds like mere weakness to me. Cowering in the darkness like an insect. What a pathetic existence." He glanced around the dim apartment. "... I'm sure you can barely imagine such a thing."

"That's enough!" snapped Peridot, banging a tiny, adorable fist against her armrest. " _You're_ the one who can't imagine it! You've got no reputation to lose, and you solve everything with your fists – but our employer is a mammal of intellect! They're carefully balancing a masterful diamond heist with a relentless political campaign, allowing neither one to jeopardise the other! You'll see – with their plan, it's inevitable they'll obtain both the diamond and the position of mayor." Her voice took on a reverent tone as she looked into the middle distance. "It's really quite amazing, the extent of their planning. I wouldn't be surprised if there was no eventuality they weren't prepared fo-"

"Wait." Tai Lung's voice was dangerously quiet. "How do you know he's running for mayor...?"

Peridot blinked. "U-uh..."

"Do you _know_ who he is?!"

"Wh... w-who said they were male?" Peridot said, smiling feebly. She squeaked in fear as Tai Lung grabbed her by the collar.

" _I_ don't know who he is!" he roared. "Why is it you get to know and I don't?!"

"I-It's called compartmentalisation," said Peridot. The familiar task of explaining something to someone much less intelligent than herself brought her some much needed comfort. "It's for safety! Only our employer knows everything. Because I'm handling the digital side of things – w-with which they're unfamiliar – I, by necessity, know most of the plans. Or maybe I just think I do! You, of course, know a hefty percentage of it, although it's apparently... less than... I do. And those hyenas, well...! I think you'll agree the less they knew the better, right?"

"Oh, I'm sure," said Tai Lung icily. "It's just that now we're a three-person team in which I'm the _third_ most important member." He released her, letting her drop back into the chair. "So you can understand my concern."

He turned and strode back toward the window. "W-wait!" called Peridot. "Where are you going?!"

"I feel like taking the day off." He pulled back the curtain sharply, causing Peridot to hiss slightly as the light suddenly flooded back in. He turned to her, one leg already through the window. "If you care so strongly about our employer and his precious plan, then perhaps _you_ should do something to clean up this mess." Then he was gone.

Peridot sat in her chair for a moment. Her eyes fell on her desk – and Bentley's darts.

"Maybe I will, you oversized oaf," she murmured to herself. "Maybe I will..."

Then she drew the curtain and went back to watching cartoons.

* * *

[ _Hello again! To clarify things a little, it's my headcanon that Judy moved in to Nick's place after the events of the film, an idea I used here for simplicity's sake. This is where I'd plug the stories I wrote about that concept... except I only wrote a tiny one and never got around to doing more. Whoops._ ]


	12. ReCooperation

Like Judy, Sly was helped out of the paralysis by his friends – though the process wasn't quite as smooth. Acupuncture was the best method, but Bentley decided that going to an outside source was probably off the table. A decent professional would be too likely to alert the ZPD – and a shady professional might not be much better than Murray after watching an online tutorial.

After watching an online tutorial, Murray attempted to fix Sly.

It took a lot of trial and error, and they would need to leave behind some extra cash so the owner of the autoshop could buy a new kitchen table, but in the end Murray succeeded in undoing the paralysis... more or less.

Even after sleeping in unusually late, Sly felt an unnatural stiffness in his limbs – not exactly something a master thief would hope for. He spent much of the day doing stretches and light exercise, but couldn't quite shake himself back to peak form. Even still, he was proud of Murray, especially for how he had handled the previous night's rescue operation. He idly advised the hippo to go out and treat himself to something.

Of course, Murray wasn't the only one he needed to thank.

In the afternoon – telling himself the walk would probably do him good – he braved the artificial snow. He was grateful his disguise included a warm parka, but he kept his usual gloves on as well. There was a shop nearby that had caught his eye. He had a pleasant chat with the arctic fox behind the counter, and eventually bought one of the more expensive boxes, paid for the shop's gift-wrap service, and paid for expedited delivery. Then he left a tip.

No matter what challenges the Cooper Gang had to face, at least money was never an issue.

He returned to the autoshop in high spirits – only to find Bentley waiting in the front hall of the living area, next to the staircase. "Oh, hey. Everything okay?"

"I'm afraid not," said Bentley. "Do you want the bad news, or the really bad news?"

Sly winced. "Uh... let's start with the bad news, I guess."

"Very well. After Officer Wilde mentioned them last night, I realized that hacking into the city's traffic cameras might be worth my time. I've been using them to keep an eye on Lombax Labs prior to our operation there tonight – and it's a good thing I have, since I discovered something disquieting."

"Did Peridot beat us to it?" said Sly.

"Worse. She entered the premises some time ago, and she hasn't come out. I fear that she hasn't just claimed a copy of the schematics – she's turning the place into a death trap for us."

"That _is_ bad news," murmured Sly. "But not entirely, right? Now we know where she is, at least. We can take her down – tie her up in some wires and hand her over to Judy."

Bentley raised an eyebrow. "My thoughts exactly – I was hoping we'd be able to neutralize her and turn her over to the ZPD. I'm sure... Officer Hopps would be glad to see that. But that leads me directly to the really bad news. Remember how you told Murray to go out and buy himself something nice?"

"Uh oh," said Sly. "Did he eat one of those... Jumbo Pop things?"

"No," said Bentley gravely. "He ate _two_. And as of right now, he is very much out of commission."

Sly paused for a moment, then headed up to the first floor – covering the distance with two jumps up the staircase's bannister and a vault over the handrail at the top. He gently knocked on the door to Murray's room. "You okay, pal?"

He could make out anguished groans through the door. "I regret **every decision** I've **_ever made!_** " Murray managed.

Sly sat on the bannister and slid back down to Bentley. "He's... been through worse?" Sly attempted.

"True," said Bentley evenly, "but he won't be in good condition for tonight. We need to work something out if we're going to take on Peridot."

"We always do, pal." Sly slid off the bannister and into a stretch. "In fact, I have a pretty good idea of who could help us take down that tiny nerd, so – "

"Sly," said Bentley, "can I talk to you for a second?"

Sly blinked. "Uh, sure. Is this about me and Judy? Because, just to be entirely clear, I was talking about Judy."

"No, actually. I admit I do have some concerns as to how close you're getting to her, but manipulating local law enforcement to our ends is something we've always done."

"Gee," said Sly flatly, "when you put it that way, how could it _possibly_ be questionable...? Well, if it isn't that, what is it?"

Bentley paused for a moment, ordering his thoughts before he spoke. "Sometimes," he said, "in order to complete a job, I have to suggest we do something... unsavoury. I've accepted that's just one of my roles on the team. We could be fighting a mob boss or a warlord or a drug trafficker, but in order to get to them, we need to lie to a civilian, or disrupt the local ecosystem, or, in one memorable instance, desecrate a tomb."

"You assured me she was an _Evil_ Wolf Priestess," said Sly firmly.

"She was! And that's exactly my point. When I present you with something like that, you and Murray always voice your concerns. I need to cajole you, convince you it's really necessary. But now it's only Murray. You've stopped."

"What?"

"Yesterday, I asked you to steal a party invitation from a nice old man," said Bentley, "and your only concern was whether _you'd_ be in danger. I waited. I gave you plenty of time to object. But you didn't."

"Uh, yeah," said Sly, suddenly uncomfortable, "because like you said, it's necessary. We need it to steal -"

"- from a public museum! Okonkwo's smart, but he's not evil! It's about time I ask you, seriously: why are we doing this?"

Sly thought for a moment, then smiled humourlessly. "Huh. Guess I never did explain myself fully."

He pulled back the lip of his glove and unzipped a small pocked sewn inside. In his early days, he'd kept his calling card in there. Now it held something else.

Sly produced a carefully folded scrap of paper and offered it to Bentley. "I think this explains it better than I could."

Bentley took it and opened it out, squinting at the small print through his glasses. After a few moments he said "Of course... Sorry. I should have remembered."

"You're not the one who needs to apologise," said Sly. "I've been acting weird, and you're right to call me out on it. I completely get where you're coming from..."

"Where _we're_ coming from," said Bentley, returning it. "I'm sure that if he wasn't currently in the foetal position on the floor, Murray would agree with me. Over the years, we've gotten used to taking on terrible people, and making the world a better place by shutting them down. So to go back to our earliest model – to steal something merely for its own value... it just feels strange now."

"I see what you're saying." Sly gently folded the paper and returned it to the glove, nestling it against the photograph he also kept there. "But... it's too late to call it quits on this heist, right? We've invested too much to just skip town. Besides, if we give up now – "

"We're basically handing the diamond over," said Bentley. "Letting it be stolen by someone who has proven themselves to be very dangerous. No, we won't let the other gang get their way."

"Good to hear." Sly smirked, though again, it lacked any trace of his usual good humour. "Maybe those jerks interrupting us was actually a stroke of good luck, if it makes you and Murray feel better about this."

"We'd do it anyway, Sly," said Bentley sympathetically. "If this is what you think you need, we're behind you. It's just..."

"Yeah. We'll have a long, serious talk about our next move." Sly strode upstairs, going to gather his gear. " _After_ we steal this diamond."

* * *

Nick knew as much about computers as the next fox. He had a better understanding of the workings of a smartphone than, say, his ageing mother. But he was no expert. Once specialised terms started to get thrown around he quickly became lost.

He found Carmelita in animated discussion with a group of the ZPD's dedicated IT staff. She greeted him, seemingly glad to see him, and then went straight back to saying a series of words Nick had difficulty even understanding. This was a rare displeasure for Nick, since he liked to think he knew the meaning of most words – or most words worth knowing, at least.

He was starting to wonder what exactly Carmelita expected him to contribute when a plan materialized. Bogo and Carmelita had decided it was best to keep the hacking problem quiet; the ZPD couldn't afford to appear weak to the public, or worse, the two gangs. Carmelita had volunteered herself and Nick to assist the IT staff. The rest of the department would carry on as normally as possible.

While the IT staff would something something expunge something something mainframe something something hard reset something, Carmelita and Nick would have the mercifully straightforward task of installing an auxiliary firewall system on the building's computers. All they'd have to do is plug a flashdrive into every computer and click 'Install'.

That was more Nick's level.

Together, they'd covered most of the headquarters by late afternoon. They had finished the busy areas, and were now working on the last few computers in a quiet back office. These machines barely saw any use at all, but all potential entry points to the system had to be covered.

The little green bar reached one hundred percent capacity. The computer dinged.

"Yeah, yeah," muttered Nick, removing the drive. "' _Ding_.'" He yawned. "This one's all set."

"This one isn't," Carmelita said, glaring at the monitor. Sadly, the desktop did not yield to her steely gaze. "The firewall program this hunk of scrap already had is interfering with the installation. Guess I'll need to take a look at the settings..."

Nick stood, stretching. "I gotta say, I didn't expect you to know so much about computers. On top of everything else, I mean."

Carmelita shrugged. "Experience, I suppose. I don't think this is a speciality of mine or anything. But I've seen this kind of thing plenty of times..."

"Yeah, I'm sure." Nick's mind strayed to the night before – the terrifying ease with which Bentley had hacked into the city's phone network while simultaneously preparing a voice modulator. "Look, uh –"

He was cut off by a knock on the door. Nick turned and Carmelita looked up.

Clawhauser leaned in, beaming brightly. "Hi, guys! How's it going?"

Carmelita smiled. "Good afternoon, Clawhauser. Things are progressing well. Do you need something?"

"Oh no, nothing like that. Just doing my job!" He entered, the door creaking open to reveal something in his hands – a thick box, neatly wrapped in dark blue paper. He waved it at Carmelita. "You got a deliveryyyyy," he sang.

She stood, her expression becoming serious. "Be careful with that. It could be dangerous."

"Oh, don't worry. I did all the security scans. It's fine..." His grin, somehow, grew even wider. "And I think I know what it is...!"

Carmelita didn't seem convinced. Dubious, she strode over and took it from him.

She produced a dark orange penknife and flicked out a small blade, cutting neatly through the wrapping paper. She stood over the office's waste bin and let the paper flutter into it, revealing the package.

It was a box of chocolates, square and velvety red. Pinned to the top was a piece of blue and white paper, folded into the shape of a stylised raccoon face. Carmelita's lips drew thin, very slightly.

"Oh, those look lovely!" chirped Clawhauser. "Who sent them?"

Carmelita pulled the card off the box, ripping it where it had been pinned. Someone had written on it in a flowing script: " _Thanks for not leaving me to die. S._ "

Carmelita read the card, her face inexpressive.

Then she crushed the fragile paper in her fist and dumped it and the entire box in the bin.

Nick and Clawhauser stared. "Um," said Clawhauser, "if you didn't want them, I would've been glad to, uh – "

"Thank you for the delivery, Officer Clawhauser," said Carmelita, turning away. "That will be all."

Clawhauser hesitated, then nodded slowly. "Yes ma'am. I'll... leave you to it." He slunk back through the door.

The room was silent for a few seconds – Carmelita was apparently content to get back to work without comment. Nick bit his lip, debating with himself.

Then he took the chocolates and ducked out of the room.

"Hey, Clawhauser!" He jogged up, opened the box, and handed the upper tray of chocolates to the cheetah. "These might be better placed at front desk, wouldn't you say?"

Clawhauser's eyes lit up. "Definitely! I'll, uh, look after them."

"I'm sure you will," smiled Nick. "Keep up the good work."

"Thanks, Nick. You too!"

Nick turned and went back to the office. Carmelita was still typing. She said nothing.

Nick hopped onto a desk, swinging his legs. He laid the box next to him, now half-empty. Carmelita slowly, deliberately, looked up, her eyes narrowed. "... Comfortable, Officer Wilde?"

Nick shrugged. "Hey, we've been doing this for hours now. I think a break is in order, and this looks like a particularly delicious excuse to have one."

"Fair enough," said Carmelita, her attention returning to the screen. "Take a few minutes off, if it'll help you focus. I'll be here."

Nick threw a chocolate upwards and caught it with his front teeth. He chewed it slowly for a while. "You know," he said finally, "I left the other tray with Clawhauser, so practically speaking, the entire thing is probably already gone. So if there's anything you want out of this box – anything at all – there's not going to be any second chances..."

Carmelita sighed tersely. "I'm not generally one for second chances, but I can tell you're not going to let this go."

She stood. As she approached the desk, her expression shifted briefly. Her irritation faltered, and for a moment she looked uncertain. Lost.

The moment passed, and she hoisted herself up. She sat next to Nick, the box between them. He didn't say anything – he just sat patiently.

Carmelita took a caramel out of the box, but didn't eat it. She frowned at it. "I used to find this stuff charming," she muttered. "Once."

"So... this isn't the first time?"

"Not remotely." She set the chocolate down on the desk, not wanting it to melt in her hand. "This one is... quite reserved, actually. He used to send the ones shaped like love-hearts." She smiled bitterly. "Probably a bad sign that this one's just a square, huh?"

"That... depends," said Nick carefully.

"Hmm?"

"On whether or not you want an infamous criminal to be sending you chocolates in heart-shaped boxes," said Nick.

"Oh," said Carmelita. "Yes. Of course."

She was quiet for a moment. Then she took the caramel and ate it – suddenly, as though she might change her mind at any second.

Nick cleared his throat. "Look, I don't want to pry, but... what exactly is the deal with you and Cooper? And the rest of his gang, for that matter? Last night they greeted you like an old friend."

"There's good reason for that," said Carmelita. "...Well, no. Whether it's ' _good_ ' reason is definitely up for debate. I try to keep it quiet. Mostly because it could completely jeopardise my career... but also because it's just... embarrassing."

Nick held up a hand. "If you don't want to tell me, that's complet– "

"No," said Carmelita. "You've more than proven your dedication to this case. You have a right to know." She bit her lip. Nick found it vaguely distressing to see her so unsure of herself. "But even still..."

Nick smiled. "How about just the short version? I don't need to know all the details. Broad strokes."

"The short version," murmured Carmelita. "Yes. That could work." She shot Nick a glare. "I shouldn't even have to ask that this remain entirely confidential."

"Of course! I won't even tell Judy, if that's what you want." He held up three fingers and crossed his heart with the other hand. "Scout's Honour," he said quietly.

Carmelita nodded, satisfied. She slid off the desk and began to pace, arms folded.

"The short version: a fox makes inspector at Interpol at an unusually young age – especially considering the well-documented ' _shiftiness_ ' of her species."

"Even at Interpol, huh?" said Nick quietly.

Carmelita didn't answer him. She glared into the middle distance for a second, then refocused herself. "Anyway... this vixen, she's talented, but she's young and inexperienced and doesn't know when to quit. So someone up the chain gets the bright idea of sending her after this mysterious thief who up until then had made a complete mockery of law enforcement agencies worldwide. Maybe she'll catch him and move on to bigger things, but chances are, she'll fail and give up and learn some restraint."

Nick smirked despite himself. "Is that what they said in the briefing?"

"Just a theory," muttered Carmelita. "Well, the brass is right about one thing – she _doesn't_ know when to quit. Instead of giving up, every failure, every setback, every memory of that raccoon's _smirking_ face disappearing into the night just drives her on. She chases him for years, never cornering him, maintaining her reputation by arresting the scumbags he leaves in his wake."

She slowed. Her fingers dug into the fabric of her jacket. "Except... things don't stay clear-cut. The raccoon doesn't always act like she expects a criminal to. He helps her, even saves her life. He sees it all as one big game, which is usually _infuriating_ , because he's toying with her job and her morals and society as a whole..." She let out a sigh. "... but the game isn't fun unless she's playing, and it stops being a game at all if she gets hurt. So he watches her back, and she starts to watch his, and all of a sudden we _are_ playing a game..."

Nick shifted. "So... if he used to send you love-heart chocolates... did you and him, uh...?"

To Nick's surprise, Carmelita broke into a teasing smirk. "Oh, Nick. You said you didn't need to know _all_ the details."

He sighed dramatically, overstating the motion. " _Well_. Now you're just messing with me. And after I listened so attentively and everything."

"I suppose I haven't exactly answered your question," admitted Carmelita. "To put things more bluntly, the truth is –" and then there was a knock on the door.

They both started, and Carmelita's face instantly lost her playful expression. "We'll talk more later," she said simply. Nick nodded. She turned to the door. "Yes? Come in."

Clawhauser leaned back in, wiping his mouth with the back of his hand. "Hey, buddy," said Nick. "Got another delivery?"

"Yeah," said Clawhauser nervously, "but, uh, don't get too excited. This is kinda... the opposite of chocolate."

He handed a file to Carmelita. "The tests on Banzai's blood just came back. They were positive for midnicampum holicithias extract. It's not very concentrated – that's probably why he didn't go fully savage – but, uh... someone definitely dosed him with Night Howlers."

Nick immediately took out his phone, his thumb tapping the screen with a focused efficiency.

"What are you doing?" asked Carmelita.

"Looking up a number for the museum," said Nick. "If these idiots _are_ messing around with Night Howlers, Okonkwo needs to know. I'll tell him to have some of the antidote to hand."

She nodded. "Good idea. But do it quickly. It won't be long before we'll have to start the deadzone."

Nick paused. "The what?"

"That sounds worrying," said Clawhauser worriedly. "Should I be worried?"

"Relax," said Carmelita. "It just means we need to disable all electronic devices in the building, to ensure the hackers don't interfere while we reboot the system. It shouldn't take long."

"Everything?" said Clawhauser. "Even our phones?"

" _Yes_. Even your phones," said Carmelita. "Somehow I think you'll survive."


	13. Force of Rabbit

"Alright, let's make this quick," said Bentley as his presentation finished loading. The screen displayed a modern building, white and angular. It was covered with dishes, vents and other equipment, and completely surrounded by a chain-link fence. "This is Lombax Labs, our target tonight. It's only a few minutes away from our safehouse... which is one of the many reasons I regret we haven't hit it until now. Peridot entered hours ago, and she hasn't come out. That doesn't bode well for our operations."

"Peridot's the one who needs to watch out, if she honestly thinks she can take us on."

"Well put, Sly. This is a rare opportunity for us to strike back. We've yet to discover the true identity of the mastermind, and Tai Lung is... well, still Tai Lung. Peridot's the only member of the enemy gang we have a chance of taking down before tomorrow. If we succeed in removing her from the equation, it will undoubtedly ruin their plans. The other two are still dangerous, of course, but Peridot's the glue keeping their team together – especially considering how their leader has chosen to hide behind a digital smokescreen. They just can't work without a hacker."

"In this day and age, what band of thieves _could_? I know we'd be lost without you."

"Oh, I'm just doing my part."

Murray's breath was ragged. "Yeah! Hackers are great... but they're... tiny! Just let me at her, and I'll... I'll... oeugh..."

"Murray, I'm afraid you're in no condition to weather whatever's waiting for us inside the labs."

"Come on! I can still... help! Don't... bench me!"

"Don't worry, I won't. I'm just changing your job. Instead of accompanying Sly inside, you'll be helping me establish a perimeter to ensure Peridot doesn't try to flee. You won't have to get out of the van."

"Okay. That... sounds... more within **The** **Murray** 's current... uh... yeah."

"I should have no trouble breaking in if _Peridot_ managed to do it. I still need to grab those schematics while I'm there, right? What am I looking for, Bentley?"

"Oh, that should be simple. I've done most of the prep work, and I only need a bit more raw material to crack Okonkwo's systems. All you have to do is bring me a hard-drive with a serial number starting with 'XJ'. Have a look around – there's bound to be a few. Just one will suffice."

"You got it. So? What's the plan?"

"As with all our efforts this past week, I've kept it very simple. Step Two: you enter, secure a hard-drive, and survive whatever Peridot throws at you. Step Three: you either take her down, or you smoke her out so myself and Murray can finish the job."

"Uh, Bentley... I don't mean to question your planning, but what's Step One?"

"You tell me, Sly. You're the one who wants to bring in Officer Hopps. If you think you can convince her to join us, go right ahead."

"Really? You'd be okay with that?"

"Absolutely. I don't want you going in alone – especially since my sensors indicate Peridot has managed to shut down all means of communication. Once inside, you'll be completely cut off – any wireless signals, from our comms to ordinary cell phones, will be disabled. We won't be able to provide support remotely – all the more reason you'll want back-up to hand."

"Ah yes. No matter what Peridot's prepared, it's no match for the Buddy System."

"Joke all you want, but this is a very dangerous situation you're wandering into blindly. And suffice to say Hopps has more than proven herself, both as a police officer and as someone who is willing to help prevent you from killing yourself."

"Guess she's taken a liking to me."

"Apparently so, but as to _why_ , we may never know..."

" **The Murray**... condones this! That bunny is... awesome! And small! Harder to... hit with... a laser or... something."

"She does seem to be well-suited for this mission, yes. I just have one concern; when you contact her, try to get her to come alone. She's perfectly skilled by herself, and she should be all you need – but she's all too likely to invite along Officer Wilde, who in turn will probably inform Carmelita, who..."

"Yeah. I get the idea. I sent her something like a peace offering earlier today, but trust me, right now I want to keep out of Carmelita's cross-hairs."

There was an uncomfortable pause.

"Look, Sly, if you want to talk about what happened –"

"Thanks, pal, but maybe later. We should probably get moving on this job, right?"

"I suppose so, yes. The van's ready, so let's head out."

"You guys go ahead – I'll make my own way there. I think I need the warm-up, since I still don't feel like I'm at one hundred percent. Besides... I have a phone call to make."

* * *

Judy tried to enjoy her day off.

By god, she really _tried_.

Once Nick left, Judy decided the make good use of the pillow-mountain. She stayed put and turned the TV back on. Unfortunately, daytime television didn't prove to be especially engaging. She surfed through a lot of infomercials and young children's programming before finally finding something that managed to hold her interest; a talkshow focused on politics and current affairs. Judy listened with interest to the commentary on the municipal election – but after about twenty minutes, the topic changed. The discussion turned to the recent appearance of infamous thieves in the city, and a ferret on the show's panel spoke very loudly and very animatedly about how it was unacceptable to have these dangerous criminals moving freely, and that the ordinary citizen of Zootopia could no longer feel safe, and that the ZPD was obviously not doing nearly enough to –

Judy decided to go for a run.

Judy often went running to stay in shape. It probably wasn't what Nick had in mind for her day off, but it was still technically recreational. Because she had nowhere in particular to be, she took a long and scenic route, and – by complete coincidence, of course – happened to go by ZPD headquarters.

She slowed to a jog as she passed it, trying to see through the closed glass doors – but she caught herself. She knew she was acting childish. If someone needed her – Nick, or Bogo, or Carmelita, or Nick – they knew how to contact her, and wouldn't hesitate to do so. She kept going.

As soon as she got home, she checked her phone. Sometimes she didn't feel it vibrate in her pocket while she was running. It would've been really embarrassing if Nick had tried to call her!

He hadn't.

No-one had.

It was her day off.

In the afternoon, she put on some quiet music – the greatest hits of Fleetwood Yak – and clambered back into the pile of pillows to read a novel; an old detective thriller from her collection. She'd read police fiction ever since she was a teenager, and she still was in the habit – although these days she made a game of noting all the places the characters' actions were inconsistent with actual police protocol.

" _Detective Pleasant, you need to rein yourself in immediately! Have you no regard for your own safety?!_ "

" _I appreciate the concern, Chief, but you're forgetting who you're talking to. After all, there's a reason they call me the most dangerous cop in this city. I've made it this far by taking risks and pushing hard, and I don't intend to stop – not now. If you honestly think I'm just going to sit back while these killers are on the loose – that I'd allow myself to rest while good people are in peril – well, -_ "

Judy went for another run.

It was also very long.

This time she ran a little faster.

In the evening, she sat down, took a deep breath, and rang her parents. They were pleasantly surprised, if slightly bemused by the fact _she_ rang _them_. She was happy to catch up on everything going on in Bunnyburrow – the farm, the town, the exploits of her many siblings...

"And what are you up to, Jude?" asked her father. "Still out there, saving the world?"

Judy laughed. "Something like that."

"You _are_ keeping safe, aren't you?" said her mother, making no attempt to hide her concern. "We heard the news about those two awful thieves. Does the chief have you working on that case?"

"The chief has _everyone_ working on that case," said Judy. "Don't worry, we have it all under control. Safety in numbers, right?"

"Spoken like a true rabbit." Stu sighed proudly. "Don't mind us. We're old, and we worry. We should know by now that – "

"– you know what you're doing. Of course!" said Bonnie quickly, nodding. "It's just that – well, you know. You've always been a trier. Never one to back down from a challenge."

"Leading the charge! That's our Judy, right?"

"Yeah," said Judy. "Right."

Time passed.

Judy was staring out the window, her foot tapping against the floor restlessly. It was getting dark. She would need to leave soon – it was getting dark outside, and she was considering going for a run.

Then, mercifully, her phone buzzed.

Her ears shot up, and she scrambled to see what Nick had texted her. Chances were his actual workday was over, but maybe he and Carmelita were going on another night mission. Maybe they were going to get a drink somewhere and were inviting Judy along. Maybe Nick was just confirming he was about to come home. Mostly Judy wanted to talk to someone.

Even still, she was taken aback when she saw that it wasn't Nick who had texted her.

It was Sly.

Her paw hovered over her phone. She pushed aside her uncertainty – sure, it was good to be cautious, but there was no harm in seeing what he said, right?

 _Evening. Free to talk?_

Judy sighed. "Well, this was inevitable," she murmured to herself.

She sank back into the pillows and started to tap out a response. _**Sly**_ , she wrote. Then she frowned and erased it and wrote _**Mr Cooper**_ , then frowned again and started over.

 _ **Sly, I like you and all,**_ – no, that wouldn't do.

 _ **Sly, you're pretty nice for a master thief,**_ – no. She sounded like a child.

 _ **Sly, I appreciate your help,**_ – there – _**but I can't afford to mess around with**_ – no.

 _ **Sly, I appreciate your help, but this is risky for me. We shouldn't get too close.**_

It took her a few minutes to compose – even when she had worked out how she wanted to phrase it, she still hesitated before hitting Send. In contrast, his reply came quite quickly.

 _Here I thought we had something special. Didn't think you were the kind of girl to do this by text – don't I at least deserve a phone call?_

She could easily hear his suave, sarcastic tone through the text. She rolled her eyes – but part of her was enjoying this.

 _ **I'd ask if you ever stop making dumb jokes, but I guess I already know the answer: only when you're physically incapable**_

 _That paralysis was pretty nasty, alright. Hope you came out of it okay. I'm just glad there aren't any lingering side effecasfdsf_

 _Sorry, dropped my phone_

Judy chuckled despite herself. She realized she should hurry up and see what he wanted – Sly was still a master thief, and this most certainly fell under the definition of 'messing around'.

 _ **Be careful out there! … Where-ever 'there' is. What's this about?**_

Sly didn't reply immediately. Judy was starting to wonder what had happened when she got a new message. This one wasn't a text – it was an image. She opened it.

It was a picture of Sly, his arm outstretched to get himself into frame. At first Judy thought he was holding his phone upside-down, but then she noticed the ' **KEEP OUT** ' sign next to him was the right way up. Sly himself was upside-down, hanging at the knees from the top of a tall chain-link fence. He was grinning.

 _Pictured: the master thief in his natural habitat, a beautiful city full of interesting things to steal_

 _ **Is there a reason you're sending evidence of yourself breaking the law to a police officer?!**_

 _Of course. I'd be glad to explain. Not sure why you haven't called me yet when you already know how amazing my voice sounds_

Judy sighed. He was pretty insistent – but then again, so was she.

 _ **Sorry, but I'm still a cop. I'm not going to sit down and call a master thief. Shame there's no possible way to solve this problem**_

There was a delay of a few seconds. Then Sly called her.

She answered, smirking. "Glad you worked that out. Maybe hanging upside-down finally got some blood into that brain of yours."

"Oh, don't be ridiculous," came his voice. "That was just for the photo. Now I'm walking along the top of the fence, like a sensible person."

"Of course. Well, you got your phone call – so start talking."

"Sure thing." He paused. "First thing's first, though. Thanks for everything you did last night. I mean it."

"Hey, like I said. Just doing my job," said Judy softly.

"And like _I_ said, that wasn't 'just' anything. You fell from the sky and went toe-to-toe with one of the strongest jerks I've ever had the displeasure of meeting – and I have known a _lot_ of strong jerks. If that's really your idea of mundane police work, well... I can see why everyone in this city likes you so much."

"Well, I wouldn't exactly call it 'mundane'... but it's what I do. I'm glad you're okay."

"Same here." Another pause. "Anyway...! Figured you might want to hear about an exciting opportunity to get some payback."

"You know Tai Lung's location?"

"No, and honestly, I don't want to. Sorta hoping he just decides to go home and I never have to see him again. It's Peridot, actually. She's finally come out of hiding. It looks like she's trying to set a trap for me and the guys – but in order to do that, she's backed herself into a corner. We want to take her down before tomorrow, and we figured: 'Hey! Judy's cool, and has the legal authority to arrest people. Let's invite her along.'"

"I'm flattered..."

"I know it's risky for you, but the way I see it, everybody wins. The city has to worry about one less criminal, I get to put my considerable talents to good use, and not only do you get the credit for bringing her in, you also get the honour and privilege of hanging out with me."

"Wow," said Judy flatly. "What more could a cop ask for?"

"I knew you'd be excited. There's just one small issue. Peridot's smart and nervous, which makes for a frustrating combination. A small group could take her by surprise, but anything larger will just spook her. We only have one shot at this, and we can't afford to waste it. If half your department appears, she'll disappear for sure - so I have to ask you to come alone."

Judy thought it over – albeit briefly. "Don't worry – I've managed to balance everything alright so far. Chief Bogo will only hear about this once I have Peridot in handcuffs!"

"Good to hear. You and I are more than a match for her. Besides, with no other cops, we'll actually have a chance to chat. I promise I'll have more to say than I did last night."

"Honestly, I think I preferred it when you couldn't talk."

"Hilarious, Judy." His sarcasm was gentle – about as genuine as an ironic statement could get. "So? Are you in?"

She pretended to think about it. "...Yeah, I'm in."

"Great! It's Lombax Labs in Tundra Town – I'm here already, keeping an eye on things. I'll see you soon. And remember – just yourself."

"Yeah, of course. I'll see you there!"

Judy ended the call.

Then she immediately rang Nick.

* * *

Nick's fingers continued to drum against the desk. Carmelita didn't look up from the file she was reading. "...Something the matter, Officer Wilde?"

"How much longer is this going to take?" said Nick testily. "We turned everything off almost an hour ago and the techs are, what, halfway done? I know they need to get the... expunging, or whatever... right first time, but come on. You said this would be quick."

"Oh, stop whining, Nick," she said calmly. "You spend too much time on your phone anyway."

* * *

The call didn't go through. Judy dialled again, then waited five minutes and tried a third time for good measure. Still nothing.

Hard as it was to believe, Nick Wilde had turned his phone off.

Judy paced around the living room as she thought things over.

Nick had asked her to take the day off. It was obvious he was deeply concerned for her after the fight with Tai Lung. He was her partner, her room-mate, and without a doubt her closest friend; she would never want to break a promise to him.

So it was pretty lucky that she _had_ taken the _day_ off, and now it was night-time.

Peridot needed to be stopped, and she was the only cop in the city who could pull it off. Judy Hopps was back in the fight.

Even still, Nick deserved to know what was happening. She was confident that she and Sly could deal with Peridot, but Judy would prefer Nick to be there too. She wanted to share the credit for arresting the lynx – and besides, it would just be less fun without him. She sent him a quick text.

 _ **Sly's cornered Peridot at Lombax Labs in TT. Meet me there asap. You can yell at me for being stupid as soon as we arrest her. See you soon!**_

With that she threw on her coat and was out the door.


	14. Life and Death and Love and Birth

Lombax Labs loomed in the dim light. Night always seemed darker in Tundra Town – whether it was just her imagination, or yet another ingenious feat of urban engineering, Judy couldn't say.

She had taken the subway across town to get here, wrapped up in her thoughts and a warm purple coat. The city was as busy as ever – some animals had finished their workdays and were enjoying the evening, while others, more nocturnally inclined, were only starting their routines. Even still, the noises of life had slowly faded as she approached Lombax Labs, and now it stood before her in snow and silence.

Judy came up to the fence. She recognized the ' **KEEP OUT** ' sign from Sly's photo, and realised with a small smile that this must be the spot he took it.

She glanced around. "Probable cause..." she murmured to herself. Then she crouched down, preparing to climb – and noticed something.

It was hard to see in the uniform whiteness of the snow, but she spotted a small, carefully folded piece of paper.

She picked it up delicately. It was a little wet, but still fine. She unfolded it, curious.

It was a newspaper clipping from more than thirty years ago. The headline read " _PROSPECT DIAMOND STOLEN IN DARING HEIST!_ " She skimmed the article; three thieves had stolen the diamond from a museum by drilling underneath the building. Two pictures were included. The first was of the diamond, a caption stating it was the largest one discovered – at the time, of course. The second was fuzzy and blurred, even by the standards of cameras of the time. She could barely make out the face of the person depicted.

Thankfully, it also came with a caption. This was the culprit, the leader of that band of thieves.

 _'Cunning_ ' _Conner Cooper_.

After a moment, Judy folded the clipping and pocketed it. Then she jumped up and began to climb.

* * *

Carmelita knocked on the door to Bogo's office. The reply was immediate and characteristically terse. "What?"

She opened the door and leaned in. "Just reporting that the mainframe is secured."

"Good." Bogo pushed up his reading glasses and rubbed his eyes. "Shouldn't have happened to begin with, but... good."

"Cyber-security is a difficult prospect, especially these days," said Carmelita, "but yes, it was unfortunate. We've identified the entry point, and taken the necessary steps to seal it. It won't happen again."

"And by the way, you can turn your phone back on," called Nick from behind her. He glanced down at his smartphone, sitting in his paw. "These things always take forever to boot up..."

"Noted. Good work, you two. Stay sharp. We haven't heard anything about Cooper or Tai Lung today. I don't like it."

Nick blinked. "Isn't that good news?"

"Hardly," snapped Bogo. "Just means we don't know what they're doing."

"Oh. Good point."

"Dismissed," said Bogo, turning back to his paperwork. "Keep it up."

"Yes sir."

"Of course." Carmelita clicked the door shut, and they began strolling down the corridor. "So, Nick. Any plans for tonight?"

He shrugged, smiling. "Nothing in particular. I left Judy home alone, and she's probably dying to get out of the house. I know a nice little bar – good atmosphere, and right now the owners hold us in very high regard. Want to come along?"

"I'd like that! Although I don't drink alcohol... Not during a case, at least."

"Oh, don't worry about it. Me neither, actually. There's a good selection of other stuff. Just be prepared for some mild exasperation."

His phone vibrated slightly – a signal it had turned on fully. "Ugh, finally," he muttered to himself. He checked it.

His eyes widened.

"Everything okay?" said Carmelita.

He smiled weakly. "Three missed calls from Judy in a row. Guess I forgot to tell her about the deadzone..."

"Apparently."

"She left a text, too." He tapped his phone and read it.

Nick, very pointedly, did not react at all.

Carmelita waited. "... Well? What happened?"

He looked up, smiling calmly. "Oh, don't worry about it. Sorry to bail like this, but I gotta go. I need to sort something out with Judy real quick. See you tomorrow, okay?" He ducked away.

"Nick, wait!"

It was late, but headquarters was still teeming with people – with cops. Nick hurried through the corridors and headed for the parking lot behind the building. It was the only place nearby where he could call her. Even there he'd need to keep his voice down and speak in code.

He had to stop her.

Mercifully, the car park was empty. The cold night air helped him focus.

He rang her.

* * *

Murray was sitting in the van, parked in a dark alcove. He watched through his Binocucom as Judy slipped through a window. "Alright, she's gone inside!" he said into the comms.

Whatever Peridot had done made the connection a little crackly. Still, from his position in an abandoned building across the street, Bentley heard him. "Copy that, Murray. Nothing for us to do now but wait."

"Sure thing! Time for some sitting and waiting – **The Murray** style!"

"... Yeah."

* * *

The call didn't go through. Nick dialled again. Still nothing.

Judy wasn't answering.

Nick bit his lip, panicking. Usually, he'd wait five minutes to try calling a third time, but he wasn't sure he could stand to be alone with his thoughts for that long.

"Nick."

It was Carmelita – she had found him. He turned to face her, smile sliding back into place. "Oh, hey! Look, you go ahead without me. I just need to –"

Carmelita reached out and gently touched his arm. Nick started, then gave her a dubious look. "Uh, what are you –"

"Nick," she said, "your paw is shaking."

He froze. After a second, he pulled away. He kept his eyes on the ground.

"Nick, if something's wrong – if Judy's in trouble – I can help. I _want_ to help. Please. What's going on?"

Nick smiled – a bitter, broken parody of his previously smooth facade. "I'd... like that, honestly. I'm not even sure what I could do by myself. As _usual_..." He looked up, hesitant. "But I don't know if I can tell you. This is..."

Carmelita smiled. "You can trust me, Nick." She held up three fingers and crossed her heart. "Scout's Honour, right?"

Nick took a deep breath. "Yeah. Yeah."

He took one last look at his phone, and then sighed heavily. He seemed to get smaller.

"Then... there's something you need to know."

* * *

The labs were warmer than she'd expected. It wasn't long before Judy shrugged off her coat and began to carry it in the crook of her arm. Her pink shirt was conspicuous against the stark white walls of the facility. She wandered the dim hallways, half-lit by weak, intermittent lights.

She waited a few moments, but nothing happened. Clearly he was waiting for her to react. She smiled thinly and didn't break her stride. "Y'know, it's rude to sneak up on people."

Sly kept pace beside her, his footsteps silent. He smirked. "Sorry. Didn't mean to startle you."

"Yes you did. You absolutely did."

"...Okay, I did. But I should've known better. Looks like even _I_ can't get the drop on the most dangerous cop in Zootopia."

"And don't you forget it!" said Judy, returning his smirk. "You're just lucky that you're out of my cross-hairs for now – it's Peridot who needs to watch her back tonight!" Without slowing down, she added "So am I going in the right direction, or...?"

"I think so. I've been keeping a low profile, checking things out from the shadows. I didn't press on too far, just in case the fun part started before you got here – but that's not a concern any more. Pretty sure Peridot's holed up in the main security office, which is this way."

"Alright then. Let's get to it."

"After you."

After a while, the corridor widened out – and things became darker. The lights came to an end. There was a wide space in front of them, but it was too dark to see into.

"You think this is the right way?" whispered Judy.

Suddenly, a huge screen activated on the far wall. It displayed Peridot, smiling darkly and leaning too close to the camera.

"Yeah," said Sly. "I think this is it."

"You _clods!_ " said Peridot. Her voice boomed over the building's speaker system, echoing from all directions. "I have you right where I want you!" She sat back, showing slightly more of her surroundings – she was sitting at a large computer console.

Judy fished her badge out of her wallet and shoved it at the screen. "Dorothy Perrault, you are under arrest!"

"Yeah," said Sly. "Give up now, if you know what's good for you."

Peridot scoffed. "Unlike you, I'm perfectly aware of what's good for me. It's remaining useful to my genius employer – which right now means destroying you both!"

"Oh yeah?!" called Sly. "Then come down here! Let's see how it turns out for you!"

"You'll be lawfully arrested and left entirely unharmed!" said Judy quickly. "That's how it'll turn out. Please come quietly."

"You dolts! I'm not getting out of this chair. I don't have to! _Behold!_ " With an inelegant cackle, Peridot slammed a finger into a button on the console.

One by one, spotlights flared, illuminating the room in front of them. It was a huge space, wide and long – probably the main factory floor. But the industrial machinery had been repositioned and re-arranged and recalibrated. An ugly metal labyrinth stretched out before them, cobbled together from conveyor belts, robotic arms, and even the occasional forklift.

"Feast your eyes on my gauntlet of deadly terror!" shrieked Peridot. "Lasers will fire! Pistons will crush! Blades will slice! Entire _sections_ of it will violently swing up and down!" She grinned. "Your knuckleheaded athleticism is no match for my brains! And once you two are gone, there's no way my employer's plans can fail!"

"Seems like this is the only way forward," said Judy gravely, looking over the monstrous maze. "It looks tough, but I think we can make it. Are you ready?"

To her surprise, Sly yawned.

"First of all, I've seen piles of rocks deadlier than this. It's like you didn't even try."

"Hey!" said Peridot. "I worked hard on this...!"

"Secondly... I dunno." He stretched. "Usually, I'm all _about_ this kinda stuff, but I'm still not feeling my best after that fight with Tai Lung. I just wouldn't find this as fun as I normally would. So... no."

"' _No'?!_ " squeaked Peridot.

Judy frowned. "Are you saying we just... _don't_ go into the death trap?"

"That's exactly what I'm saying, yes."

She blinked. "Well... it's hard to argue with that. What do we do instead?"

"There's an employee lounge back a little ways. We could just head there, take a couple minutes to think of something?"

"Yeah. Okay."

Peridot spluttered. "What?! You – you can't!"

Sly and Judy turned around and walked away.

Unfortunately, Peridot's voice hounded them, emerging from every speaker they passed. "This is completely wrong! You _have_ to go forward! I'm forward! You can't just – who _does_ this?! **Stop!** "

They came to the lounge. It was a small space, with the stale, inadequate comfort of a corporately-designed recreation dispensary – made worse by the fact the lights were off. Judy stepped in after Sly, glancing around at the minimalist furniture.

The door slammed shut behind them.

"A- **ha!** " crowed Peridot over the speaker on the wall. "You stupid, _cloddy_ **clods!** "

"She's starting to lose it," murmured Sly calmly.

"Every door in this building has electronic locks – and I just _sealed you in!_ You're completely trapped! You may have rudely disregarded my gauntlet, but now all I need to do is watch you **starve!** "

"Hey, look," said Judy. "They have vending machines in here."

There was a pause.

Peridot started to scream.

Judy frowned in discomfort, her ears twitching. "Don't worry, I got this," said Sly quickly. He kicked a chair over to the speaker, stood on it, and slammed his cane into the plastic. It caved and the sound cut off instantly. They could still hear Peridot's shriek echoing through the building, but it was muffled by the door.

"Thanks," said Judy meekly. "Maybe turn off that camera, too. And I _mean_ turn it off, not smash it. Let's keep the property damage to a minimum, alright?"

"You got it." Sly slid the chair under the security camera and stood on the back.

As he began disconnecting the wires, Judy examined the door. She jumped up to the handle and tested it, but the door wouldn't budge. "It's locked, alright! Was this part of your master plan?"

"Nnnnot really," admitted Sly. "Mostly I just wanted to mess with her. Didn't think she'd be able to come up with a Plan B, even one as lame as this."

Judy slid back to ground level. "...So does that mean you were lying when you said you still didn't feel great after Tai Lung?"

Sly just shrugged.

Judy turned back to the door, tapping her chin. Sly finished disabling the camera, then wandered over to one of the vending machines. He looked it over for a moment, then jammed his cane into the side. He whacked the handle and it popped open with a bang, startling Judy.

She strode over, frowning. "What did I just say about property damage?"

Sly grabbed a packet of chocolates and leaned against the wall, sliding down to sit cross-legged on the floor. "Hey, we could be here a while. You may as well take something."

"Actually, I always keep two energy bars and a bottle of water in my uniform," said Judy briskly.

"Huh. Good habit to have."

"I know."

"So," said Sly, opening the packet, "where _is_ your uniform? Because I'm guessing it's neatly folded in your closet."

Judy's eyes widened as she realised she was in her civilian clothes. Of course she was. It had been her day off.

"... Darnit!"

Sly laughed. "Come on. Help yourself to something."

Judy frowned at the exposed contents of the vending machine. She didn't have much of an inclination toward sweet foods, so she when she finally – begrudgingly – took a _Brief Paws_ bar, it was based purely on the fact Nick seemed to like them. Then she caught Sly's eye and deliberately placed a neat stack of change next to the vending machine.

Sly smirked. "Well, I guess that's fair." He dug into his pocket and casually tossed a handful of large golden coins next to Judy's money.

Judy knelt down to examine one. "Are these legal tender...?" Sly shrugged.

Judy remembered something. "Oh!" She reached into her back pocket and produced the newspaper clipping. "I found this outside. I'm guessing it's yours."

When he saw it, Sly's eyes widened and his casual smile seized up. He dropped the packet and quickly checked the pocket inside his glove. The photograph was still there, but the clipping had indeed fallen out.

He sagged. "...I can't believe I dropped that."

"Hey, it's okay," smiled Judy. "You were hanging upside-down, after all. Anybody could've dropped it."

"I don't make the same mistakes other people do," he said sullenly. "Hell, if I make _any_ mistake..."

Judy's warm smile became a smirk. "Then you're lucky I'm so observant – and so nice." She offered it to him. "Here."

He took it, handling it carefully. He gave her a smile. "...Thanks." He unfolded it to check for damage.

Judy sat next to him, peering over his shoulder. "So... is that your dad?"

Sly smiled at the blurred photo. "Yeah. That's my dad. What, can't you see the resemblance?"

"No," said Judy. "I'm sure it's there, but I literally can't see it."

Sly laughed. "Yeah, he never did have the best luck with cameras. Shame, really. I mean, he was about as handsome as I am, naturally, so the world was missing out..."

"The Prospect Diamond used to be the world's largest, huh?"

"Until recently, yeah. Which is exactly why he stole it." Sly folded the clipping and returned it to his glove, making sure to zip the compartment closed. "One of the highlights of his career. The job that made his name, actually."

"Is that why you're trying to steal the Nope Diamond?"

"Let's just say it's a big factor." He shrugged, his smile gone. "Can't help but feel Dad's plan went a lot smoother than how mine is turning out, though."

"Hey, this past week has been hard on everybody," said Judy consolingly. "The important thing is that it's been hard for the bad guys, too – and we're gonna keep it that way."

"That's something, at least." His smirk made a triumphant return. "Hold on. Did you just imply you don't consider me a 'bad guy'?"

"Don't get ahead of yourself, Cooper," laughed Judy. "You're still a thief, and a menace to poor, defenceless diamonds... but no. From what I've seen, I don't think you're a bad guy."

"Well, thanks," he said. "That means a lot, coming from Zootopia's best cop." He shrugged. "I guess I've survived a lot worse. If all that goes wrong with this plan is that I'm locked in a room with Judy Hopps, well..."

"You sure?" said Judy drily. "Can't your friends come and save you from this horror?"

"About that..." Sly gestured vaguely to his ear. "Peridot's cut off communications. Everything's blocked. Bentley and Murray will probably come investigate eventually, but it could be a while."

Judy took out her phone. Sure enough, there was no signal.

"Huh." She put it back. "Then it's a good thing I texted Nick before I got here!"

Sly sighed darkly. "So you _did_ tell Nick."

"Yep! Your exact words were ' _I have to ask you to come alone_ ', and I did. You told me not to _bring_ anybody. Nothing else."

"Guess I walked into that one... Well, that works. Eventually Nick will show up, and he and every cop in the city can help us jimmy open the door."

Judy scoffed lightly. "Oh, don't be like that. Nick's smart enough to keep this quiet."

"If you say so."

"No, seriously. Actually, I think you and Nick would get along really well. Uh, under other circumstances, I mean. You remind me a lot of him."

Sly grinned. "That's quite a compliment. To Nick, of course."

"Yeah, see, Nick would definitely make a joke like that."

" _Who said it was a joke?_ " Sly and Judy said in unison. Judy smirked. "See? I know what I'm talking about."

"Apparently so." Sly paused. "You two seem real close, alright."

Judy smiled into the middle distance. "Yeah. I've never had a friend like him. I feel like I've known him for decades, even though it's barely been a year. Guess nearly dying next to somebody a whole bunch really speeds up the whole bonding process."

"I can confirm that," said Sly simply.

Judy's smile faded. "I... don't think he handles the pressure as well as I do, though. I don't mean he's a wimp, or anything! He's a great cop, just... not built for danger. He definitely enjoys it less than I do, anyway."

"Most people are like that," said Sly. "Without normal people living safe lives, there'd be nothing for the rest of us to steal. Or, uh, protect. It takes a particular kind of person to make the risky plays. Like you, and me."

"And Carmelita!" said Judy.

"Yeah," said Sly, "and her. And, unfortunately, Tai Lung, and a lot of jerks like him. The world's cops need to be on their toes. Nothing wrong with playing it safe sometimes."

"That's true..." Judy smiled humourlessly. "He's useful for grounding me, thanks to the Nick Wilde Name Warning System."

"...The what?"

"He doesn't even realize he's doing it, but it's definitely there," said Judy. "It's a gauge of how reckless I'm being. If he calls me 'Carrots', everything's fine. He's relaxed. If I'm 'Hopps', that's an amber alert. Something's wrong, and he wants me to take it seriously. And if he calls me ' _Judy_ ', well..."

"Code red."

"Yeah." She shifted slightly. "I always found it a little odd that... well, Nick's so used to lying. He's a natural – heck, he made a career out of it. But he has such an obvious tell."

"It's pretty easy to lie to a target. It's much, much harder to lie to somebody you like," said Sly. "Believe me. I speak from experience."

"Yeah... you and your gang don't keep secrets from each other, right?"

"Uh, yeah. That's what I meant," lied Sly.

With difficulty.

* * *

Nick and Carmelita pulled up to Lombax Labs. They stepped out of the cruiser.

Carmelita was no longer smiling.

From the van, Murray frowned into his Binocucom. "Uh, Bentley? You seeing this?"

"I am," came the reply. "This is an unfortunate change in the variables, albeit one I knew was likely. It seems Hopps didn't want to come alone after all."

"Maybe they're just looking for her?" said Murray, as Carmelita began to examine the fence.

"Either way, the result is the same. This job just became a lot more complicated." Murray heard him sigh. "But... hold your position. Let's keep our distance for now."

"Whatever you say, buddy." Murray watched as Carmelita said something to Nick, her breath misting in the cold air; Nick nodded slowly. "Sure hope this works out okay..."

* * *

[ _I hear Mr Cooper's name was eventually (semi-)confirmed as "Conner". I thought this was a little odd, as surely the only kind of person who would name their son something like "Sly" would be someone with an equally absurd name, like Cunning – or that's what I figured, anyway. As you can see, I went with a compromise._ ]


	15. And Peace And War On The Planet Earth

"Log date: Thursday, May First. Eight fifty-five pm."

Peridot looked up from her communication device – dutifully recording her speech – to glare at the error messages on the computer console.

"In an unprecedented display of insolence, Cooper and Hopps have ignored my finely-crafted death gauntlet, and have taken refuge in an employee lounge. Although I sealed them inside, they've disabled the cameras, meaning I have no idea what they're doing. If I were to guess, I'd imagine it's something stupid. And potentially indecent."

She flicked through the other cameras with her free hand. "This was supposed to be quick. How can I impress my employer with my initiative and intelligence if it takes me all night to destroy two measly opponents?! The only thing that has gone **right** so far is that this chair happens to be lynx-sized...!"

She stopped. The camera she selected showed the front gate of the facility. Nick was climbing down the inside of the fence – Carmelita was already within the compound, looking around with a glare.

" **A _-_ _ha!_** " cried Peridot. She cleared her throat. "...It appears Wilde and Fox have entered the premises, presumably as back-up for Hopps."

She grinned. "Take two."

* * *

Judy was pacing around the lounge – ostensibly to find an escape route, but mostly because she was tired of sitting still.

Sly was obviously not tired of sitting still, judging from the way he was comfortably sprawled against a vending machine. He crumpled up the empty packet of chocolate and, with perfect accuracy, threw it one-handed into a waste bin across the room.

"Heh." He glanced over to Judy. "No pointing wasting your energy. You may as well get comfortable."

"As comfortable as I can get..." she muttered, but she saw his point. She sat cross-legged on the floor, facing him. She watched him expectantly. He looked as if he had something to say – and after their surprisingly honest discussion a few minutes ago, Judy was quietly hopeful.

Sly grinned. "So... ever thought about being a thief?"

Judy sighed in exasperation and flopped backwards, arms spread. "No. No, I have not."

He laughed. "No, really! You'd be good at it. You're determined, you're crazy athletic, you can think on your feet. You'd fit into an air-vent no problem. That's most of thieving right there."

"Except for the part about wanting to take other people's property. That seems important."

Sly shrugged. "Doesn't have to be _good_ people's property. I mostly steal from dirtbags. We all have our ways of making the world a better place."

"Sure." Judy realized something. She pushed herself up onto her elbows, smiling. "Hey, better question. You ever thought about being a cop?"

Sly's smile froze, but the humour in his eyes died. He looked away.

Judy felt a flare of anger. "What, you can joke around about me breaking the law, but –"

"I was, actually," said Sly quietly.

Judy blinked. "What?"

"I was a cop. For a while."

Judy sat up. "Look, if this is some kind of joke..."

"No, it's true. But your scepticism is understandable." He pulled himself into a more respectable position. "How to explain this? It's a _long_ story..."

"I've got time."

"True, but I'm probably going to go on at least five long tangents, so maybe I should skip to the end. So...! A guy shot me in the head."

Judy recoiled. " _What?!_ "

"Oh, don't worry, I was fine. Wasn't the first time, won't be the last. Cooper skulls are pretty solid, thankfully." He tapped a finger to his temple. "But it did _look_ pretty bad. So after Carmelita pounded his ugly face into the ground, she rushed over to me and helped me stand and... asked if I was alright." He smiled at the memory. "You're working with Carmelita, right?"

"Yeah. She's an incredible cop."

"She is." He coughed. "I... suppose she hasn't told you about our... history?"

Judy raised an eyebrow. "She told us how she's been chasing you for years, and you keep escaping."

"Right. Uh... what she probably didn't mention – understandably – is that all that time _she_ was chasing _me_ , I was... chasing her." Judy gave him a blank look and Sly added "...Romantically."

Judy blinked. "Really?"

"Really. I mean, you've seen her in action. Like you said, she's incredible. I've had a thing for her ever since... since I first saw her, actually." He smiled distantly, but it faded. "We had our little moments through the years. But chasing each other across rooftops, flirting down the barrel of a shock pistol... it's all a very romantic _image_ , but in reality, it's... unstable. Not exactly the basis for a healthy relationship. I loved our game, but I knew we couldn't play it forever. So when I saw a chance to change the rules..."

Judy tilted her head. "What?"

"When she asked if I was okay, I pretended to have amnesia."

"You _what?!_ "

Sly shrugged calmly. "It sounds absurd, but exceptional romances call for exceptional strategies. It was a spur of the moment thing. I figured it might be my only shot."

"Did she believe you?"

"She... played along, at least. I was just hoping she'd take me home. But, uh, she actually –"

* * *

"– made him join _Interpol?!_ "

"There's no need to shout, Nick," said Carmelita.

"Right, right. Sorry." They continued down the dim hallway. "It's just... did you know if he was lying?"

"I... had my suspicions," she said. "But I wasn't sure. Either way, I saw an opportunity to take a very resourceful and talented _drain_ on Interpol resources, and point him in the right direction."

"And an opportunity to keep a close eye on him, I'm sure," muttered Nick. "How, though? How did you...?"

"It presented an interesting challenge," said Carmelita evenly. "But once I convinced my superiors of his potential as a field operative, things fell into place. Like I said, Interpol –"

"– Is surprisingly nuts. Yeah." He rubbed his eyes. "Did he even –"

Carmelita stopped, holding up a fist. They had turned a corner, and a large space stood before them, too dark to see into. "Hold on. This could be dangerous." Nick nodded, pushing aside his questions.

They moved forward – and Peridot's screen burst to life from the darkness.

"Welcome to your **doom** , clods!"

Carmelita levelled her shock pistol at the screen – a pointless gesture, but Nick noticed Peridot flinch slightly.

"You're under arrest! Get out here, now!"

"Don't make this hard on yourself," added Nick. "Coming quietly is the smart thing to do."

"'The smart thing' – 'the _smart_ thing'?!" Peridot scoffed. "You wouldn't know the smart thing to do if it bit you on the tail!"

Nick shrugged placidly. "I have my moments."

"Well, have **this!** " Peridot re-activated the spotlights, revealing her maze. "If you want to get to me, you'll have to contend with my gauntlet of deadly terror! Lasers will fi–"

"Yeah, that's great," said Nick. "Where's Officer Hopps? And Cooper, for that matter?"

Peridot blinked. Then she folded her arms in disgust. "Maybe you should try asking me in _person_. You rude little man..."

Carmelita nodded. "Fine." She readied her pistol and threw her other hand in front of Nick. "Get ready. Stay low, and I'll protect you."

He gently pushed her arm back down. "I appreciate it, Inspector, really, I do. But I have a simpler solution."

"Oh? What's that?"

Nick lifted a finger, lazily pointing to the gauntlet. "See all those wires? Something like this would need a lot of juice, straight from the mains. As per Zootopia building regulations, the electricity for somewhere like this is routed from the city grid through an external generator." He pointed back over his shoulder. "I saw the generator right outside. Why don't we just go and cut the power?"

There was a pause.

Peridot started to sweat.

Carmelita nodded. "Excellent thinking."

"Hey, I have my moments." They turned and began to walk away.

" _Wait!_ " shrieked Peridot. The two foxes looked back.

"Good, surrender now," said Nick. "That'll save everybody a couple minutes."

Peridot bit her lip. She had been saving a secret weapon for the right moment, but this would be her only chance to use it.

She put on a snide smirk. "You know, _Inspector_ , I would be wary of any ideas your friend suggests!"

"Is that so?" said Carmelita drily.

" **Yes!** It _is_ so! After all, I don't see how you can trust... a former _con artist!_ " cried Peridot with malicious triumph.

Nick froze. Peridot grinned and slammed a button, and the screen displayed footage of Nick and Judy at the ZPD.

 _"_ _God! Why were you about to tell her I used to hustle people for a living!?_ _"_

 _"_ _Do you really think she'll look down on you just because you used to be a con artist?_ _"_

Nick felt himself tense. He tore his eyes away, watching for Carmelita's reaction – but all she did was frown slightly.

"I know already," she said.

"You do?" said Nick softly.

"You _**do?!**_ " squeaked Peridot. She yelled in frustration. "Oh, what **ever!** " She turned off the screen, leaving Nick and Carmelita in silence.

Finally, Nick cleared his throat. "How long hav–"

"From my first reading of your file, I had suspicions," said Carmelita staunchly. She wasn't looking at him. "Too much innuendo and evasive language in your personal biography. But specifically? When I met with Bogo and named you as my choice of liaison, and he replied – and I _quote_ – 'Ah, the former con-man.'" She turned to look at him and Nick immediately wished she hadn't. The fire in her eyes was back. "Did you _really_ think you could hide it? You know everyone in this city – and everyone knows _you_. It's not a secret."

He blinked. "Then why didn't you –"

"If you didn't want to tell me, that was your decision," she snapped. "Honestly, I don't blame you. If I had wasted most of my life like that, I wouldn't want to broadcast it either."

Nick's felt a hot stab of anger in his gut, but no amount of anger he had could ever match Carmelita's. "...Yeah."

She softened – slightly. "...The important thing is that you're a cop _now_. So come on. We're wasting valuable time."

With that, she strode back down the corridor.

After a moment's hesitation, he followed.

* * *

"So... what happened?" Judy had shuffled closer to Sly, listening intently.

He sighed at the ceiling. "It was going well. Actually getting to _be_ with Carmelita was amazing. And being a cop was a lot more fun than I thought. Well, mostly. The _paperwork_..."

She chuckled. "Yeah. They never show that stuff in the movies."

"For good reason! But working with Carmelita meant that I was usually just beating up bad guys. It was good. Not that different from my previous career."

He frowned. "But... too different, apparently. After a while... it was kind of like an itch. I started getting restless, fidgety. I became more and more confused by how Carmelita would _buy_ things, with money, instead of just taking them. It sounds nuts, but... it was like withdrawal. I had to steal something. I needed to pull a heist. And then I got word from Bentley that some jerk was messing with my family history, and that was it. I couldn't resist the opportunity. One last job with the gang."

"And she found out?"

"After about thirty minutes. Dunno what I expected, really. It's hard enough to keep secrets from your girlfriend _without_ that girlfriend being one of Interpol's top investigators."

"Did you try explaining...?"

"Yeah. But she was furious." He scratched at his neck. "And honestly, I don't blame her. I went behind her back."

"You should have went to her first," said Judy quietly. "I'm sure she would have helped you."

"Probably. Thinking over it, late at night, I keep coming back to that. 'Why didn't I involve her from the start?'" He shook his head. "But I know why. Even if – _if_ – I found a way to tell her without jeopardising my amnesia story, we would've solved the problem as cops. And even if it was only for a night, I had to be a thief again. I had to go back to being who I really am."

"Don't talk like that." Judy moved to sit next to him. "You don't have to be a thief. Not if you don't want to."

"Nice sentiment... but that's the thing. I _do_ want to. I always have. For one thing, all my ancestors were thieves."

Judy smiled thinly. "All _my_ ancestors were carrot farmers. But..."

"No, of course. It's not everything. But tradition _is_ important to me. Besides..." Sly looked over his cane lovingly. "Being a thief is just what I'm supposed to do. When I was a kid, I never even considered doing something else. There's lots of stuff I'd be good at, like acting or athletics or, yeah, police work. But I'm a thief. And I won't be happy doing anything else."

Judy didn't look convinced.

Sly sighed. "Yeah, I know how it sounds. It's one of the main reasons I couldn't talk to Carmelita about it. That, and... look, I was very happy with her! But I had to give up everything for it to work. My career, my lineage – even Bentley and Murray. They understood my decision, and they didn't hold it against me..." He smiled humourlessly. "...but they were also real glad to have me back. It was inevitable, I guess. I was a thief since childhood. I couldn't just... _decide_ to be a cop."

Judy wanted to object – but what could she say? ' _Try harder next time_ '? She coughed. "I don't know what to tell you, Sly. It must be hard, balancing a love-life with your, um, vocation."

"All my ancestors managed to do it. Otherwise, I wouldn't be here." He sagged. "It's one of the many things I wish I knew about my parents. How did they meet? What was Mom doing before that? How did they decide to get married? But I never asked..."

Judy remembered Sly's file – she'd read it more thoroughly after hearing Bogo's brief summary.

It described the incident in gory detail.

He was eight at the time.

She laid a paw on his shoulder. "Sly... I'm so sorry."

He smiled softly. "Thanks, Judy. Thanks."

After a few moments, he cleared his throat. "Sorry. Didn't mean for things to get this dark."

"It's alright," she said gently.

"Good to get this stuff off my chest, I guess. Thanks for listening. Not that I expect Zootopia's star cop to relate to it."

Judy slowly withdrew her paw. "Actually... I'm not exactly the hero everybody thinks I am."

Sly scoffed faintly. "What? You behind on your paperwork or something?"

"I'm serious." She kept her eyes low. "I have this image as an amazing cop, protecting the city. But to solve the Night Howler case, I did some stuff that should _not_ be celebrated."

"Bent the rules, huh?" said Sly. "Big deal. I'm sure it's fine."

"I got my mob boss friend to threaten to kill a guy," said Judy.

Sly blinked. "...Oh."

"And honestly?" she continued. "I'd do it again. If it meant stopping someone like Bellwether – protecting innocent people, _actually_ making the world a better place – I'd gladly do it again. I'd threaten a hundred guys. A thousand."

"How did you befriend a mob boss...?" asked Sly, but Judy didn't hear him.

She sighed. "I've always believed in improving the world. I've never taken my eyes off that goal... even when I thought my best course of action was to shut up and go home. And I'm proud of that commitment, y'know?"

"You should be," said Sly.

"But..." She frowned, taking a moment to find the right words. "When I came to this city, I was so idealistic... and don't get me wrong, I was stupid! I'm glad of everything I've learned, glad my perspective is more nuanced..." She shifted. "But have I gone too far in the other direction? What if I start doing bad things, justifying them to myself? Saying it's all for the greater good? Lionheart was the kind of person who thought like that, and, well, he has another fourteen years left on his sentence..."

Sly thought for a moment. "You know the one thing all the villains I've ever faced had in common?"

"They're all in jail?" said Judy with a slight smile.

"Good guess, but no. Selfishness. Their goals, their plans, and their attitudes all varied, but at the end of the day, whatever they were doing was for themselves and nobody else."

"I... guess Lionheart was protecting his career, too," said Judy.

"Sure. All I'm saying is, as long as you remember why you're a cop – if you put other people before yourself – you can't be that bad, right?" He shrugged. "But hey, I'm the last person to give advice on not becoming a criminal. You might have better luck talking to other cops." He realized something. "...Have you told Nick about this?"

Judy hugged her legs. "I suppose I've been kinda... avoiding it. Our conversations are usually so breezy and fun. I don't like bringing up this kind of stuff."

"Well, you should," said Sly. "I've seen the way he looks at you. He really cares. He's a good partner – but partnership is all about communication."

"Yeah... you're right!" Judy nodded, finally regaining her usual confidence. "As soon as this is–"

Suddenly, with a muted boom, the lights cut out. The door beeped loudly and swung ajar.

"Somebody cut the power," said Sly, a touch redundantly.

Judy jumped to her feet. "It's probably Nick! He's here!"

"Great..." Sly grabbed his cane and stood. "The door's open, too."

"Standard health and safety procedure," said Judy authoritatively. "Exits need to be clear if there's some kind of emergency. Electronic locks are programmed to open automatically if the system fails."

"Makes sense. Well, no sense standing around." He gave her a warm smile. "But, um... thanks. Good talk."

"You too." She returned the gesture – then broke into a grin. "Now come on!"

She bounded out of the lounge. Sly eagerly followed her.

* * *

With the lights gone, the security office was only illuminated by the moonlight coming through the large window opposite the console.

Peridot was curled tightly on the chair, eyes wide. She was panicking so she was repeatedly pressing the big red Panic Button on her wristband but the Panic Button wasn't doing much and that just made her panic harder.

The door crashed open and Peridot squeaked, hugging herself tighter. Carmelita strode inside, pistol at the ready. Nick followed, his own weapon drawn.

"You're under arrest!" snapped Carmelita. "Hands up, now!" Peridot complied, sticking her feet out for good measure.

Down the corridor, Sly and Judy turned the corner. The security station's door hung open, giving them a clear view of Nick and –

"Carmelita?" said Judy. "How did she...?"

Sly said nothing – but he immediately made a note of the nearest air-vent.

Judy shook her head, trying not to think too hard about Carmelita' presence. Instead, she saw an opportunity. She gently took hold of Sly's sleeve. "Come on! You should talk to her."

Sly pulled away. "Hey, there's lots of things I _should_ do. Like cut back on junk food, and pay taxes to at least one government, and, I don't know, stop stealing things. There's a lot of 'shoulds'. Doesn't mean I'm about to do any."

Judy gave him a patient smile. "Sly, you can't run forever."

"Watch me."

In the office, Peridot tried a frown. "Y-you'll never break me!"

"Right..." Carmelita produced a pair of handcuffs and, without looking away from Peridot, passed them to Nick. "Put these on her, and hel-"

" **Okay!** " shrieked Peridot. " **I'll tell you everything!** "

Carmelita and Nick blinked in unison. "...Great," said Nick.

"I have logs! Data! I could tell you exac–" Peridot suddenly stopped, remembering something. "Wait. No. Even if you arrest me, there's still –"

The window exploded.

Shards of sharpened glass flew in all directions. "Get down!" Carmelita yelled, tackling Nick to the floor.

Tai Lung landed.

He had breached the Cooper Gang's perimeter moments before – and kicked over Bentley's wheelchair as he passed him. Murray was too slow to catch up to him, so there was nothing stopping him from extracting Peridot – as his employer had begged him.

Well, _practically_ begged.

The important thing was that he was getting paid for this.

He grabbed Peridot by the collar. "Now who's the 'clod'?" he growled. He shoved her under his bulky arm. Peridot squirmed and kicked him in the stomach, but it was out of clumsiness rather than defiance.

Tai Lung glanced over to the two foxes – Carmelita was recovering quickly, but it wouldn't be fast enough. "Evening, officers!" he called, kicking Peridot's chair in their direction.

Then he was back out the window.

" **No!** Not this time!" Carmelita was running before she fully stood up, dodging the chair. "Nick, go get the car ready!"

"Uh, yeah," said Nick, who was mostly trying to process the last ten seconds.

Judy reached the office just as Carmelita leapt out the window. She ran up to her partner. "Nick! You are okay?"

"Yeah, I'm – wait, Hopps?!" Nick blinked in surprise, but had finally recovered. "Hey!"

"Yeah, it's me. Don't worry." Judy offered him both paws, helping him to stand.

"If you're here... then where's –?"

Sly sidled into the room, looking around. His eyes fell on a set of hard-drives stacked on the console. He picked up the first and checked the serial number, confirming it began with 'XJ'.

He smirked to himself.

"Drop it!"

Sly's ear perked and he turned slowly. Nick was aiming his shock pistol squarely at his chest, tightly clutching Carmelita's handcuffs with his free hand. Judy stared in surprise.

"Officer Wilde." Sly smiled, casually pocketing the drive. "We still haven't been properly acquainted."

"Keep your mouth shut, Cooper," said Nick fiercely. "You're under arrest."

"Oof... hate to disagree with you, pal, but –"

"But nothing!" Nick took a step forward, eyes hard, aim steady. "You're coming with us. Drop your weapon and stop talking."

Sly frowned. "I was honestly expecting you to be a lot funnier."

"This isn't a game. Drop your weapon and _stop talking_."

"Look," said Sly calmly, "I don't mean to sound callous, Nick, but you aren't exactly the first cop who thought he could arrest me by ignoring my reputation hard enough. And with Carmelita gone... you just can't take me in by yourself."

"I'm not by myself," said Nick, keeping his eyes on Sly. "Judy. Cuff him."

He threw the handcuffs to Judy's feet. She blinked. "Uh, wha-"

"He's alone!" Nick brought his free hand up to his pistol. "This is our only chance to arrest him. Cuff him!"

Judy glanced between them uncertainly. Sly was giving her an uneasy look – Nick's gaze hadn't moved from his target, his face hard. Judy hesitated. "But... Nick –"

"Cuff him! _Please_ , Judy!"

Sly said nothing.

Judy hesitated.

"Judy!" yelled Nick. "What are you –" and as he turned to look at her Sly whipped into action, slamming something onto the ground.

The smoke bomb exploded instantly. Nick and Judy backed up, covering their faces. Even in the stale air of the office, the cloud dispersed quickly.

Sly was nowhere to be seen.

Nick ran into the corridor, but there was no sign of Sly.

Gone.

Judy jogged up to him. "Nick... I –"

Nick's voice was quiet. "What was that?"

"I just... I thought that –"

" **What** ," Nick snapped, "was **that**?! We had him! What the hell is **wrong** wi–?!"

Nick saw Judy's purple eyes, wide with shock, and he cut himself off. But he wasn't able to stop himself from glowering. For a few long, agonising seconds, they stood in icy silence.

His radio crackled. "Nick! I lost sight of Tai Lung. Status report?"

Nick unclipped the radio from his belt with a sigh. He spoke with his eyes to the ground. "...Found Judy. Cooper was here, but... he's gone."

Carmelita didn't reply immediately. After a pause, she said "Copy that. Rendezvous at the car."

"Right."

He glanced up in Judy's vague direction. "Well? Come on."

He strode away without looking at her. Judy wanted to say something – anything. But nothing came.

Instead – ears low – she silently followed him.


	16. A Fox And His Bunny Are Soon Parted

Judy woke suddenly, with a feeling of uneasiness.

If she had just had a nightmare, she didn't remember it.

She took a moment to collect her thoughts, frowning in the dim sunlight. Carmelita had been waiting for them at the car. She had looked Judy in the eyes and drilled her for information. What did he say? Did he give any clues about the location of his safehouse? Or his plan for the diamond? Judy had nothing for her except the number of his burner phone.

She was expecting Carmelita to be furious. Instead, she had just nodded distantly and sat into driver's seat.

Nick said nothing.

They tried for a while to track down Tai Lung or Sly, but they were both as elusive as ever. Carmelita noted that whatever chance they had of cornering them was all but wiped out by the lack of other police. Judy mumbled an apology.

Nick said nothing.

It wasn't long before Carmelita pulled up to their house. She told them that they needed to be well-rested – the gala at the museum was in danger from both gangs. As Judy got out of the car, she noticed how Carmelita was looking at her. There was something in her eyes Judy couldn't quite describe. She thanked her for the lift. Carmelita shrugged, then set off for her hotel.

Judy had tried to crack a dumb joke as they entered the house. She was surprised at how small her voice sounded. She wondered if she always sounded like that.

Nick said nothing.

Now she could hear him downstairs, having breakfast. Normally, they ate together, or at least at roughly the same time. Judy shifted under the covers. Clearly, that wasn't happening.

She reached for her phone and checked the time. It was later than she usually got up. Over the last year or so, whenever her alarms had failed to go off – as they had this morning – Nick woke her instead, playfully teasing her for being 'lazy'.

That wasn't happening either.

Judy lay in bed for a few moments, but it was hardly restful. She was wasting time. She crawled out of bed and quickly got dressed.

Sure enough, she found Nick at the kitchen table, slathering strawberry jam on his toast with slightly more violence than was necessary. She cleared her throat and managed a small smile. "Good morning."

He grunted and didn't look up. Judy was disappointed, but she couldn't pretend to be surprised. She opted for something more practical.

"It's kinda late. How come you didn't wake me for work?"

"Didn't know if you were going in today," Nick said to the table. His voice was low. Even. "You're off-books, after all. Might as well take the day off."

"You know that's not like me," said Judy with a gentle cheeriness.

"I'm not sure what I know about you," murmured Nick.

There was a pause as Nick bit into his toast. Judy waited a moment, then sighed.

"Nick... can we talk?"

He finally met her gaze. He looked tired. Not from lack of sleep.

"...Yeah, Judy. Let's talk."

She hopped into a chair across from him, pushing aside the thoughts about how she didn't fit in it properly due to it being built for someone fox-sized because she had much more important things to think about right now and she sat in this chair every morning so it would _definitely_ be completely ludicrous for that to bother her now.

Nick watched her. She wasn't sure if his silence was a prompt for her to start, or if he was just back to not saying anything, but either way the onus was on her.

She took a deep breath. "Nick... I'm sorry for what happened last night."

"Good," said Nick flatly.

"I messed up. Really, I did. When you told me to cuff Sly, I should have."

Nick carefully laid down his slice of toast. "...No."

"What?"

"Don't misunderstand me. I want Cooper behind bars. And that little... scene after Peridot left, that was... mmh." He clenched and unclenched a fist, focusing himself. "But you misunderstand the problem. That shouldn't have happened in the first place."

Judy didn't quite follow. "Like I said, I'm sorry. I hesitated, and I–"

"It shouldn't have happened," said Nick a bit more forcefully, "because you shouldn't have _been_ there. We had a deal."

Judy shrank, lowering her eyes to the table. Nick's voice softened, but he continued.

"We had a deal. I was apprehensive about this from the start. Working with thieves might get results – it might seem glamorous – but they're using us. I don't want any part of that. So we agreed: one lead from Sly Cooper. And ever since we followed that one lead, it's like you've done everything in your power to wriggle out of that promise."

Judy shifted. "The fight with Tai Lung..."

Nick raised a hand. "Yeah. Yeah. We debated it already. And I'll concede that it was... different. But last night? Do you have _any_ excuse for why you didn't let Bogo know immediately?"

"Sly said –" began Judy, and Nick rolled his eyes, "– that she'd probably bolt if too many cops showed up."

"Uh huh. No, I should've guessed. That sounds exactly like what the _wanted thief_ would say."

"Well, what about you?" said Judy, a hint of indignation in her voice. "Why didn't you tell the whole department?"

"Because _I_ was trying to bail _you_ out," Nick hissed. "I don't want to be the one who tells Bogo that you've gotten chummy with Interpol's Most Wanted. My plan was to make sure that you and Cooper weren't... holding hands, or anything, and _then_ bring down the ZPD on Peridot." He exhaled. "Carmelita only came along because... I couldn't lie to her. Maybe if I had some warning, time to prepare. But I got your text right in front of her. I couldn't..."

"I understand," said Judy. "And I'm sorry. I shouldn't have put you in that position in the first place."

"That's exactly what I've been saying, yeah." Nick picked up his toast and resumed eating.

There was a pause for a few seconds. "So... is that it?" said Judy. "Are we good?"

Nick didn't look up. "No. No, we are not good. But hopefully, we're... adequate. We've got a lot of work to do, and Okonkwo is counting on us. So let's just get through tonight, alright?"

Judy hesitated for a moment. Then she steeled herself and said "I'm sorry, but no. I don't want 'adequate'. I want to do this right."

"You've got to be kidding..." Nick muttered to himself. "Let it go, would you? We'll talk about it later."

"I think we should talk about it now," said Judy. "I realized last night, during the... mishap with Sly, that I haven't been as communicative with you as I should be. I'm sorry for that, and I owe it to you to be more open. So let's work this out."

"Well isn't that just the _sweetest_ sentiment," Nick sneered. He dropped his toast and rubbed his temple. "That's another thing, by the way. Something I've been meaning to ask. When exactly did he stop being 'Cooper' and start being 'Sly'?"

"Oh, I don't know," said Judy, unable to stop the irritation creeping into her voice, "probably around the time he saved my life."

"What?! When was this?"

"The... Tai Lung thing. He threw me off a bridge. And Sly _saved me_ ," she continued, cutting off Nick's reply. "So yeah. I guess I've been a little nicer to him since then. _Sorry_."

Nick buried his face in his paws. "This is nuts. You – you know _why_ he saved you, right?"

"What?"

"Because you were still useful!" he yelled. "He's not done with you, and you're no good to him dead. If he had some way of beating Tai Lung by himself, you..."

Judy's face hardened. "He's not like that."

Nick glared. "How do you _know_?"

Judy went to reply, but Nick cut across her. "No, really. How do you know, for sure, that he's actually as noble as you like to _think_ he is?"

"Well... he told me abou–"

"No," said Nick. "He's a career criminal, Judy, and I can personally attest that you're an absolute sucker for a good sob-story. You can't rely on anything he _said_. Actions. What did he do?"

"Well, since _saving my life_ apparently doesn't count, which is ridiculous..." Judy noticed her foot was shaking – tapping against empty air. She ignored it. "What about the stories Carmelita told us? Like the wedding! He saved that girl!"

Nick scoffed. "Oh-ho, _wrong_ move bringing up Carmelita's stories. First off," jabbing a finger at her, "every single good deed Cooper's ever blundered into doing, he's done for himself. Saving that girl, huh? Great example! I guess it's entirely unrelated that her father was then seen doing dangerous jobs for the Cooper Gang. No connection."

"But –!"

"And secondly," he said, adding another finger, "she also had plenty of stories that didn't show him in quite such a glamorous light."

Judy planted both paws on the table. "He saved her life! Multiple times!"

"He also left her handcuffed to a railing over an _active volcano!_ " he retorted. "That's not heroic! That's not even _safe_!"

"Look, I'm not saying he hasn't done bad things. Everyone has! What I'm saying is..." Judy belatedly realized she wasn't actually sure what she was saying. Why did this keep happening whenever she and Nick argued? She tried another route. "You know about his time as a cop, right?"

"Yeah, I do. So I also know about how he ran out on Carmelita. He threw away everything she had done for him."

"It wasn't like that," protested Judy.

"Oh, spare me. He knew what he was doing. She shouldn't have trusted him. It's just a shame she wasn't able to follow her own advice," Nick muttered.

Judy drew herself up. "No, it's not. Even if it ended badly, Carmelita was right to try to help him. Criminals make bad decisions, they put other people in danger – and yeah, some of them are absolute jerks – but they're all still people."

Nick leaned back in his chair, arms folded. "Well, thank god. Judy Hopps is here to save all us filthy lowlives with her endless compassion. Next you'll be telling me that homelessness is a real darn shame, and wouldn't it just be swell if poor people could shake off that whole 'poverty' mess?"

"Nick...!" She felt her face flush. "I'm just trying to – aagh! Why are you like this? Why can't you ever meet me halfway?"

He met her gaze coolly – and then closed his eyes. "...Sorry. That was a bit much."

Judy tried to her best not to look surprised. "It's okay. I'm sorry too."

"Don't get me wrong – it's not that you don't deserve it. But I hold myself to a higher standard when challenging your terrible opinions. I let my feelings get out of hand there." He laughed, but it was hollow. More of a scoff than anything.

"What?"

"Nothing. Just... there it is again." He gave her a bitter smile. "I think you broke me, you know that?"

Something in his tone made Judy deeply uncomfortable. "What do you mean?"

"Before I met you, I was Nick Wilde, master popsicle hustler. Suave, collected, completely unflappable. Yeah, okay. Between you and me, I was kinda miserable. But it was a very lucrative misery." He shrugged. "Now look at me. Officer Wilde. Passable cop in a world full of action heroes and supercriminals. Still sarcastic, sure, but more and more often I get... flustered. I used to have such a tight grip on my emotions. ' _Never let them see that they get to you_ '..." He glared into empty space. "So much for that."

"Nick..." She gave him a smile. "Don't talk like that. You've changed, sure, but it's been for the better."

"Some days it's hard to see it that way," he said. "Not everybody shares your optimism. Or your opinions."

He opened and closed his mouth, debating internally whether to continue. Judy watched him, giving him time. After a moment, he spoke.

"Do you know _why_ I haven't been talking to Finnick? Or any of my old friends?"

"No. Why?"

"Because I've been on that side of things. I know what it's like." He shook his head. "And... I'm terrified that one day, I'm going to get a call over dispatch that there's been a fight, or a robbery, or whatever. And when I roll up in my fancy police cruiser it'll be Finnick. Because he'll have run out of cash or been made someone's fall-guy or, or, _something_. And when that day comes, it'll be easier for everybody if I can... keep my eyes on the ground and pretend he's just another scumbag."

Judy's eyes widened. "You had to give up your friends..." she breathed.

Nick looked up. "What was that?"

She caught herself. "Nothing. Just, uh... remembering something. That's all."

"Hmm. Right."

An uncomfortable silence settled in. Nick took the opportunity to finish what was left of his toast.

Judy sat quietly, staring at the table. Without really thinking about it, she said "Do... do you think becoming a cop was the wrong choice?"

Nick's sourness gave way to confusion. "It's, uh... it's a little late to second-guess yourself now, Hopps. Especially since you already quit during the Night Howler case. You can't just wander in and out whenever you get stressed."

That was almost a joke.

Maybe venting about his concerns had made him feel better, or maybe it was just reflexive, but for the first time all morning Nick had said something along the lines of a joke. This was the first glimpse Judy had of her partner's usual self.

She desperately wanted to play along. To smile thinly and say something about how airheaded she was, and hope – pray – the two of them could leave this table with some semblance of their normal good humour.

But she couldn't bring herself to lie.

She inhaled sharply and looked down and cringed and said "...I didn't mean me."

There was a deadly silence.

She heard Nick take a long, slow breath. He spoke.

"Well, there's only two of us here... so what _did_ you mean?"

Judy kept her head down. She knew Nick would see through any attempts to wriggle out of this. She cursed herself for how, over the past year, she had only gotten better about saying stupid things by _realising_ they were stupid, not by actually stopping herself in time. Now she was trapped, forced to explain herself. It almost felt physically painful, but she had no choice.

"I... _meant_... that you were a con artist for about twenty years – ever since you were a kid – and, um... well, that's a lot of time, and you did it for so long that –"

"That I couldn't change even if I wanted to, huh? Is that it?"

Judy nodded dismally.

"That it's in my nature? That I'm just not suited for honest work, because I'm too _shifty_?!"

"Hey, no!" Judy looked up, meeting Nick's furious gaze. "I didn't mean that at all! I'm talking about you as a person!"

"Right. Me as a person. Me as an irredeemable, inherently dishonest person."

"Nick!"

"I can't believe you'd even – _you_ , of all people! This whole thing was your idea! You're the one who made me join the force! Who made me even consider the _possibility_ that I could... and you think that I –"

"I'm just trying to understand!" said Judy. "I haven't been a good enough partner to you. And last night, when Sly said –"

"I don't _care_ what Sly said!" yelled Nick. "I don't care about whatever story he sold you, because I know he's a thief trying to use us! So to answer your question; no, I do not think becoming a cop was a mistake. Not for me. Actually, I might be a better cop than _you_. I may not be able to take down a criminal built like a dump truck by doing a _backflip_ –"

"Please, just–"

"–but I _do_ have enough sense to actually follow police procedure! But hey, that's just an annoying obstacle for Judy Hopps, isn't it? The rules don't apply to heroes like you. Here's an idea: why don't you march right into Scar's living room and break both his thumbs, huh? Or better yet, just kill him! That'd keep Zootopia safe!"

"Nick, come on! I'd never –"

"No, I mean it! What's stopping you?"

"It's not right!"

"But working with Cooper is?"

"He's not a murderer!"

"And yet every night, you almost _**die!**_ "

They stared at each other for a second, both equally caught by surprise. Judy noticed how irregular Nick's breathing had become.

"Every night, you almost... you... _dammit_." Nick tore his sunglasses out of his front pocket and shoved them violently into place. They glinted incongruously in the morning sunlight.

Judy leaned forward. "Nick, I..."

"No," he said quietly. "Let me say this. While... while I still have a chance to."

He took a breath, but it didn't seem to steady him. "You are playing a dangerous game. And sooner or later, you'll lose. You're smart, but Scar's probably smarter. You're tough, but Tai Lung is _definitely_ tougher. And although you might think yourself as... cunning, and street smart, if you lower your guard around people like Sly Cooper..."

"Nick, he wouldn't –"

"Maybe. _He_. Wouldn't," said Nick through his teeth. "But what about the next one? Huh? What if the next thief you get befriend _doesn't_ save you? Or stabs you in the back? What then?"

Judy didn't answer.

Nick sighed, his breath shaky. "That's the thing, though. It feels like you're getting worse. At this rate, it might not be someone as strong as Tai Lung, or smart as Scar. Or someone as... charming as Cooper. At this rate, it might just be some punk who gets lucky. Your career isn't going to end with a retirement party. It's going to be a closed-casket funeral. And I guess that's your decision, ultimately. But I can't..." He folded his arms again, but there was no anger in it this time. It looked more like he was hugging himself. "...Yeah. I just... can't."

Judy blinked, her voice soft. "Nick... I had no idea."

"...Well. Now you do."

He stood slowly. "You obviously think you can handle this, but I feel out of my depth. I can't do all the things you can, Judy. And I can't save you."

He turned away from her, quickly wiping at his eyes. He walked to the door. "Where are you going?" said Judy quietly.

He stopped, but kept his back to her. "I'm going to do my job. Carmelita wants to get some actual police work done today, and I'm going to help her. As much as I can help anybody. You... you can do what you want."

He slunk out of the kitchen. Judy sat, frozen. She heard the front door click shut.

Judy let out a long, slow sigh. Her mouth screwed into a frown and she buried her head in her paws.

"...You're what I want."


	17. Teeth and Ambitions

A silence hung over the auto-shop kitchen.

Sly sat at the table, his phone in front of him. It was set to the text conversation he and Judy had shared, the last few messages still in view. The cursor was set to write a new message, blinking in readiness. But he wasn't typing. For once, he didn't know what to say. He had drafted and redrafted various texts all morning, but discarded them all. They sounded hollow, insincere.

She didn't want to hear from him, anyway.

"Sly?"

He glanced up at Bentley; sitting next to the television, ready to give a presentation. The screen was still set to the first image, as it had been for some time.

"Yeah?"

Bentley frowned awkwardly. "I know this may be hard for you to hear, but... I think you should probably get rid of that phone. It is a burner, after all. And since Judy knows the number..."

"Yeah. Sure." Sly nodded. "I'll find a place to ditch it."

He took a final look at the phone before quickly pocketing it.

It seemed like the silence was about to settle back in, as crushing and inescapable as the incoming tide, when Murray suddenly slammed his hand on the kitchen counter. "Okay, **fine!** If neither of you are gonna say it, _I_ will! I screwed up! I screwed everything up!"

"Murray, don't talk like that," said Bentley.

"It's true, though! If I wasn't such an idiot, I'da been able to help last night. It's my fault Peridot got away!"

Sly sighed. "Honestly, Murray... I just saw your problem as a convenient excuse. Even if you were ready, I probably would've found a reason to drag Judy into things, and everything still would've fallen apart. Everything that happened last night is on me."

"We don't know that, though! 'Cause I _wasn't_ ready! It's my fault!"

Bentley rubbed his temple. "Oh my god, guys. If it makes you feel any better, you _both_ screwed up. You're _both_ stupid. Can we please move on? Murray, if you want to make it up to us, then pull yourself together and give the heist your all. We've already forgiven you – crying about it isn't going to help anyone. And Sly, you're being unnecessarily hard on yourself. Sure, Peridot managed to escape. That's going to make tonight harder, certainly. But you're acting like the mission was a complete failure. You still survived Peridot's trap and got me the schematics. We haven't lost yet."

"You weren't there, Bentley," said Sly quietly. "I could hear Nick and Judy from the air-vent. It wasn't pretty."

"Forgive me for sounding callous, Sly, but I fail to see how that's our concern. If Tai Lung gets loose on that museum, Hopps and Wilde will have a lot more to worry about – as will the rest of the ZPD, not to mention the entire city. So can we focus on the task at hand?"

Sly and Murray shared a look. Sly sagged and made a vague gesture. "Fine. Let's get rolling."

"Alright." Bentley began the slideshow. "In a few short hours, Operation: Nopes and Dreams will begin. Sly, you'll park the subway train close to the museum, then proceed on foot. Navigate through the external security until you get to the windows above the lobby. Murray and I will enter in our disguises, find an access point, and disable the alarms. That'll be your cue to enter. We'll have to pass through the security checkpoint at the front door, so we can't bring anything in. I suggest you stock up on extra equipment. Once Okonkwo brings the Nope Diamond out of storage, you'll strike. We'll nab the diamond and head straight for the train."

"...That's it? What about the other gang?"

"What indeed. If there's one thing we've learned over the years, it's that our opponents have a tendency to wander into our path. I didn't include them in the plan because I knew I didn't need to bother. We'll run into each other, no doubt about it."

" **The Murray** is looking forward to a rematch! Hopefully knocking out some of Tai Lung's pointy teeth will make me feel better!"

"Amen to that, pal."

"Agreed. That said, the presence of the other gang, Tai Lung in particular, does pose a threat... which is why I've prepared the necessary materials for a Doctor's Note. I'll give them to you before the heist, Sly."

"A Doctor's Note?! I almost died getting that train! Now we're not even going to use it?"

"I'm just covering the bases – it's good to have options. Trust me, we'll find a use for the train." Bentley yawned. "I... may have stayed up a little too late finalising the preparations. That's it for the briefing, so I'm going to get some sleep while I still can."

"Sure. I'll head out and get rid of the phone."

"And **The Murray** will... find something to do!"

"That's the spirit. I know you're both upset, but we've had things much, much worse. Let's try to keep focused, and with luck, by the end of the night –"

* * *

The lobby of the ZPD headquarters was as busy as ever – busier, even.

But everything seemed oddly muted to Judy.

She pushed open the front door and shuffled inside. Usually the sheer size of the doorway didn't phase her; if anything, it was a sign of prestige, a symbol of her accomplishments. But there were the occasional days when her natural optimism failed her and she was reminded, if only briefly, of how small she really was. Today was one of those days.

Clawhauser saw her and waved her over. Reluctantly, Judy trudged up.

"Hey! How's it going? Are you looking for Nick and Carmelita? They left a little while ago."

"Hey, Clawhauser. I'm fine." Judy fidgeted with her sleeve. "I'm, um... no, I'm not with Nick today. Not working with him, I mean. Yeah."

Clawhauser paused, blinking. "Okay, I don't want to sound rude or nosy or whatever, but it super does _not_ sound like you're fine. Is everything okay?"

Judy cringed. Not for the first time since moving to Zootopia, she wished she had a better grasp of city folks' odd practice of hiding their emotions for no discernible reason. "Uh... well, no. Not really. But I don't really want to talk about it."

Clawhauser nodded. "Sure, sure. Didn't mean to pry. It's just... weird, seeing you like this."

Judy smiled humourlessly. "It's weirder being it."

He glanced down at the shift schedule. "You're not down as being in today... why aren't you at home?"

"I don't like the quiet," she said. "I was hoping I could lend a hand somewhere."

"Oh, okay! Let's see..." Clawhauser checked various documents along his desk. "It's actually pretty quiet, all things considered! The department's out in force, so everything is more or less handled... the only vacancy is that Hoitz down in Traffic called in sick, so –"

"I'll cover for him," said Judy.

Clawhauser stared. "Okay, now I _know_ something's gone terribly wrong. You hate traffic duty!"

"I hate sitting around doing nothing more. Besides... someone needs to do that stuff. Might as well be me."

"Well, alright. I'll call ahead, let them know you're coming..."

Judy hesitated for a moment, then spoke. "Hey, Clawhauser?"

"Yeah?"

"So, the museum is having this fancy party tonight, for the diamond... Mr Okonkwo gave me an invitation that admits two, so, would you want to...?"

Clawhauser gasped, his tail curling. "Oh my goodness, are you really asking me that? That's so sweet of you! I'm sure there's plenty of people you could've brought instead."

Judy somehow managed a smile.

He deflated. "But I _can't_. Bogo has me on call all night. Please tell me all about it, though! Fancy parties are the best."

"Oh. Sure thing." Judy pointed vaguely towards Traffic. "I'm... gonna go, uh..."

"Yeah. You do that."

She walked away. After a few steps, Clawhauser called out. "Hey, Judy?"

She turned back.

He smiled. "Feel better soon, okay?"

Judy returned the gesture. "I'll try. Thanks, Ben."

With that, she set off down the corridor. She moved slowly, but had to stay focused, keeping out of the paths of the large, busy officers thundering around her.

She was so small.

* * *

" **–attention** , boys and girls! Eyes forward!"

O'Donnell strode back and forth in front of his team, assembled in the museum's lobby. The wolves stood in a tight formation, alert and ready – although some were having difficulty disguising their trepidation.

"I'm not gonna lie, kids – tonight could be pretty rough," said O'Donnell calmly. "A lot of you are worried that a snow leopard is going to fall from the ceiling and beat you to death using kung fu. The fact that that's a valid concern at all says a lot, really."

He shrugged, arms folded. "It's possible – nah, maybe a better word is 'inevitable' – that some of you are gonna get hurt. But you knew what you were signing up for when you joined this pack. And while we're all a little... surprised... at how quickly this job escalated, that's no excuse." He stopped in front of them, eye hard. "Put it to you this way. You're all here to get paid, arent'cha?"

" **Yes sir!** "

He broke into a grin. "Yeah you are." He grew serious again. "Well, here's the deal: if I see _anybody_ disobey a direct order, or try to avoid fighting, you ain't getting your pay checks. _Any_ of you. Do I make myself clear?"

" **Sir, yes sir!** "

"Great." O'Donnell stifled a yawn. "Any questions?"

A few wolves throughout the crowd raised a paw.

"Too bad," said O'Donnell simply. "I don't feel like answering them."

He paused for a moment, looking around. Okonkwo was still ensconced in his office, as he had been all morning. No other employees of the museum were in earshot.

"One more thing," said O'Donnell, a little quieter. "Mr Okonkwo is the one signing the checks, sure, but I'd like to remind you all that _I'm_ your boss. Which means I'm the one giving the orders. So if, say, I tell you to do something, but Okonkwo doesn't like it, who do you listen to?"

" **You, sir!** "

"Damn right." O'Donnell stretched, rolling his neck with an audible crack. "Yeah, okay. That's enough out of me. Get yourselves ready for tonight. And remember – just follow my lead, and everything will be –"

* * *

Nick stared out the window, watching Tundra Town go by.

He shifted in the passenger seat of the cruiser. He knew how to drive – he had first met Flash when getting his learner's permit. It was a requirement for the ZPD, so it was just as well he had sorted out the paperwork years ago. But he never really did it. He always thought owning his own car was an unnecessary expense when the public transport worked just fine. Besides, he always had someone else. First Finnick, then Judy, now Carmelita.

He wondered who would be next.

He wondered how long it'd be before he found himself driving an empty car.

Carmelita cleared her throat, grabbing his attention. "Everything okay?"

"Huh? Yeah. Fine."

"Doesn't seem that way," she said matter of factly. "You've been moody all day."

"Yeah, I suppose so," said Nick, turning away from the window. "Sorry."

"It's fine." She smirked. "The lack of dumb wisecracks is welcome."

" _A dumb wisecrack is technically called a dumbcrack,_ " offered Nick's brain immediately. But he didn't seem to have the energy to put it into words. Instead he just grunted.

Carmelita's smile faded. "It's Judy, isn't it?"

"Yeah." Nick sighed. "Yeah, it is. We... sorta had an argument this morning."

"I can imagine." Carmelita kept her eyes on the road. "I wish I could give you some advice, Nick, but I'm afraid I can't help you on this. My own partnerships have been nothing to write home about. Best case scenario, we functioned adequately in a professional setting and got the job done. Worst case scenario, she stabbed me in the back by having me falsely convicted of a crime I had no hand in, and I spent a couple weeks on the run from Interpol itself." She shrugged calmly. "So, you know. Not much to tell you."

Nick blinked. "I guess my problems could be _worse_. Uh, thanks."

"No problem. But I hope you two can work it out. You make a great team."

Nick went quiet.

They drove on for a few more minutes. Carmelita was tracing the location of Sly's phone by GPS. She had said to Nick that it was more a matter of procedure than an actual lead, but he wasn't sure she believed that herself. He noticed a certain energy to her as they got closer, something restless.

She really wanted to find him.

"This is it," she said, pulling into a small plaza. "The tracking program estimates his cell phone is somewhere in this area. Be ready to call in back-up."

"Right."

She parked the cruiser, its thick black tires crunching through the artificial snow. They stepped out, looking around.

Nick saw it first. "Uh, Carmelita? I don't think you're gonna like this."

"What?"

He pointed across the square to a small, cosy shop. Folksy wood painted dark red, a large decal of a love heart in the glass window.

 _Fox of Chocolates – High Quality Confectionery For That Special Someone_

Carmelita snarled to herself, stomping through the snow. Like many small businesses in the city, the chocolate shop was built into the ground floor of what used to be a tall residential building. The upper floors were empty, but the windows were still there – and on a windowsill on the first floor, in plain view, was Sly's phone.

A bow was haphazardly stuck to it.

Nick noticed that Carmelita had balled her hands into fists, which were both shaking. "Uh... so sh–"

With one fluid motion Carmelita drew her pistol and shot the phone, eliciting a few startled gasps from the passing civilians. Small chunks of singed plastic rained merrily from above.

" _Guess we aren't taking that into evidence,_ " thought Nick drily. He wanted to vocalise it, but again, he just couldn't summon the effort.

She didn't want to hear it, anyway.

* * *

"– **disappointed, I must say.** "

Peridot kept her eyes low, as though her employer could see her over the telephone. Their voice was slightly distorted, the speakerphone setting worsening the effects of the voice modulator, but the words were still all too clear.

" **If nothing else, to act so rashly – running off with your own little plan, without my supervision or _approval_... I thought such behaviour was outside your nature. Clearly, I was wrong.** "

Peridot cringed. "It won't happen again, I swear!"

Behind her, leaning against the wall, Tai Lung scoffed. "Oh, I'm sure. There's only a few hours left before the heist. Surely even _you_ couldn't find a way to fail at waiting."

" **Tai Lung, that's enough,** " snapped the mastermind. Tai Lung rolled his eyes, but relented.

"I am so, so sorry!" said Peridot, for the seventeenth time. "I just thought that eliminating the Cooper Gang, and those meddling cops, would make things easier for you!"

" **Your concern is appreciated... but completely misplaced. I am the only one who makes those decisions. Do I make myself clear?** "

"Yes! Of course!"

" **As it happens, I have adjusted the plan. The Cooper Gang, uncooperative as they have been, can still be of use to us. I want them alive.** "

"Oh! I'm sure your new plan is genius!" said Peridot. "Once again, I'm really –!"

" **Sorry. Yes. I know.** "

Tai Lung sighed into his fist.

The mastermind continued. " **In some respects, your mishap was fortunate. I had to contact Tai Lung personally in order to arrange your extraction. In doing so, I learned of his... issues with my managerial style. Issues we were then able to resolve.** "

"You hear that, runt?" said Tai Lung. "I'm in the loop now, too! No more secrets! Isn't that right, _Mayor?_ "

" **Hmm,** " said the mastermind. " **In the spirit of this newfound trust... Peridot, would you please inform us both of the status of the Night Howlers?** "

Tai Lung blinked. "The what?"

Peridot also blinked. "Um, really?"

" **Yes. _Really_. Are they prepared?** "

Peridot glanced uncertainly to Tai Lung, then the telephone. She had a vague idea of what her employer was doing, but it she wasn't sure about it.

"Um, well... the serum is ready, yes. I've prepared the darts. They should achieve the same effects we produced in Banzai. Modified for dosage, of course."

" **Excellent.** "

"Am I hearing this correctly?" said Tai Lung, pushing off the wall to stand up straight. "You're using _Night Howlers?_ Why?"

" **Because this entire city is terrified of them,** " said the mastermind. " **Rightfully so. Bellwether's reign of terror is still fresh in the public consciousness, after all. Night Howlers are completely banned in Zootopia, in every form. But such measures are always... imperfect. There are always means for people like us to acquire what we need.** "

"The ban did heavily restrict our supply," said Peridot, turning to Tai Lung. "Thankfully, even with my limited knowledge of biochemistry, I was capable of producing the intended effects of Doug Ramses' solution with a less potent mix."

"Good for you," said Tai Lung flatly. "I still don't fully understand. Who are we using them on?"

" **Why, whomever do you think?** "

"Cooper and his gang?" ventured Tai Lung. "Or perhaps those interfering officers...?"

" **Very astute guesses, my friend.** "

Tai Lung nodded. "I see. Doesn't seem like an especially honourable way of dealing with an opponent..." He smiled darkly. "Though I admit it'd be amusing to see Cooper stripped of his irritating attitude."

" **Agreed. Peridot will give you the darts once this meeting is adjourned. There is an automated dart gun installed into the museum's lobby as part of Okonkwo's new security. It's intended to stop intruders with a harmless tranquillizer. You're going to exchange the ammunition.** "

"Sounds simple enough. I can do that."

" **Good.** " Tai Lung could hear the smug smirk in his employer's voice. " **Oh, and _do_ be careful when handling them, won't you? Wouldn't want to prick yourself...** "

"No," said Tai Lung, eyes narrowing. "Of course not."

" **Is that it, then? Nothing else need be said?** "

Peridot coughed. "I'd just like to apologi–"

" **Excellent. We're done here. My friends... I'll see you tonight.** "


	18. Operation Nopes&Dreams: Wolf at the Door

The night of the gala had arrived.

The museum, already an ornate and tasteful building, looked especially beautiful. It shone with intricate light displays – and with security spotlights.

Sly took in the view as he slid along the rail tracks towards the museum's rear. The subway train was secure and ready for their exit. " _If we even use it..._ "

He tried to push those thoughts aside. Here he was, out in the field. Pulling a daring heist against deadly odds.

If anything could make him feel better, it was this.

He came to the museum wall and jumped, grabbing a pipe, climbing to the next storey. He burst upwards and silently darted to cover, constantly moving, sticking to the shadows. One wolf was guarding this section of roof – he slipped behind her just as she allowed herself the privilege of yawning. Around the corner, creeping along a precarious ledge. Up to a set of spotlights, shining up and down against the wall. Under the first, pause, the second, pause, the third and then onwards, straight towards another pipe.

And like that, he was there. Outside the large windows on the museum's roof.

Sly idly nodded to himself. He _did_ feel better.

He saw the alarms built into the window frames, small red lights blinking crankily. For now, he had to wait.

With nothing else to do, he turned his Binocucom to the street below, watching the long queue of attendees waiting to get inside.

* * *

Bentley's disguise was impressively thorough, considering how little time he had to prepare it. Unfortunately, it was necessary to swap out his usual wheelchair for an ordinary one which could pass through security. It was an unsettling sensation – he wondered if this was what it was like to lose one's shell. Hopefully, it wouldn't last for long.

O'Donnell was supervising the admittance of guests, scanning the invitations personally. He had paused for a few seconds after Bentley handed him Tortimor's invitation. Murray panicked internally, but managed to maintain their cover by keeping calm. As it happened, O'Donnell seemed to buy their disguises – then made a crack about Bentley 'watching his step' while inside. Murray managed to maintain their cover again by not punching him in his smirking face.

Just about.

They had been lucky to avoid the likes of Toriel Dreemurr while waiting in line. There were plenty of people who could've blown their cover. But the closest mayoral candidate behind them was Scar, who was far too absorbed in checking over his deep green tuxedo to notice or care.

A few feet behind him in the queue, Nick nudged Carmelita. "First time I've ever been _surprised_ Scar's shown up to a party alone. Would've thought he'd bring some protection."

Next to Nick's immaculate, barely-used dress uniform, Carmelita's usual outfit looked incongruous. She wasn't self-conscious – she hadn't packed any formal wear, and if these clothes were good enough for police work, they were good enough for anything. "It's not like he could just slap a pair of sunglasses on Tai Lung," she murmured back. "And Peridot wouldn't get past security either. His distance from his gang is his greatest asset. He's not about to give it up."

Nick just nodded.

Scar reached the front of the line and handed O'Donnell his invitation. The wolf scanned the barcode, and when the machine flashed a green light, Scar continued forward.

O'Donnell raised a hand. "Hold up, sir."

Scar smiled thinly. "Is there a problem?"

"Your cane," said O'Donnell, with a downward nod. "We're operating a very strict policy on weaponry. I'm gonna need you to hand that thing over."

Scar frowned thoughtfully. "I see... Give me a moment, I'm sure I have a note from my chiropractor..." He quickly patted down the pockets of his tuxedo. He found what he was looking for, and slipped it into O'Donnell's hand.

Two hundred dollars in cash.

After the briefest of pauses, O'Donnell pocketed it. "Well, this looks like it's in order. Go right ahead. Have a pleasant evening, _sir_."

"Oh, I intend to, my good man," said Scar, slinking past him. "I certainly intend to..."

O'Donnell was, at least, efficient. The queue was processed quickly, and soon the two foxes were called up to the checkpoint.

Nick handed O'Donnell his invitation. As he scanned it, he looked Carmelita up and down. "Well, I guess the dress code was more of a guideline than a..." He trailed off when he noticed the shock pistol on her belt. He slowly met her gaze. "What," he said flatly, "is that?"

"My side-arm, officially licensed to me by Interpol," said Carmelita briskly.

"I don't care if it's been blessed by the Pope," said O'Donnell. "You want in, you leave any and all military-grade hardware right here."

Carmelita growled. Nick laid a hand on her shoulder. "Hey, I don't like it either, but it looks like we don't have a choice." He turned to O'Donnell. "You'll look after it, right?"

"Of course! It'll be right here, I promise."

Carmelita glowered at him. Then – slowly, without lowering her glare – she took her pistol and shoved it into O'Donnell's chest.

He took it in one hand, returning Nick's invitation to him with the other. " _Thank_ you. You kits have fun in there."

"Yeah." Nick tugged on Carmelita's sleeve to get her to move. Without warning, she reversed the grip and grabbed him by the wrist, furiously dragging him inside.

O'Donnell watched them go. He waited until they were out of sight, then looked at the pistol. He tested its weight, looked down the scope, and clipped it onto his belt.

"Heh."

* * *

Sly was left on the roof for roughly twenty minutes, but it felt like much longer. He tried to occupy himself by watching the crowd through the window, but his eyes would inevitably be drawn to either Carmelita – staying close to Nick, shaking hands and trying not to look too angry – or Judy, awkwardly standing by the drinks table, alone. Sly was trying to drop the habit of watching women from afar without their knowledge. It was ungentlemanly.

Finally, his cue came. The alarm on the nearest window beeped twice, then switched off, the red light fading slowly. Sly opened the window and slipped inside. He crept along the rafters, high above the lobby – even higher than the museum's opulent new chandelier, which sparkled magnificently, and the dart gun built into the wall, which did not.

"Ah," came a genial voice. "About time you arrived, raccoon."

Sly whirled around. Sitting on a beam, cross-legged, was Tai Lung. He made no move to stand. In fact, he was calmly sipping tea from a small cup, dwarfed by his giant paws.

"I knew I'd run into you sooner or later," said Sly, eyes hard. "But I was hoping it'd be a lot, _lot_ later."

"I can imagine," said Tai Lung. "It's perfectly natural to be afraid of an opponent far stronger than you."

"I _meant_ I wanted to put off seeing your ugly face," snapped Sly, "but sure, keep talking about strength, you two-fisted, two-bit dirtbag. See where it gets you."

Tai Lung laughed. "Is that a challenge, little man?"

"Glad you picked up on that. Guess you're not as stupid as you look. Just about."

"If it's a fight you want, I'd be _delighted_ to oblige," said Tai Lung, his grin widening. "I'm sure you and I could do some real damage in here, hmm? Of course, some of these soft, pathetic weaklings might wander into the way. Quite a selection of society's frailest. The rich, the elderly... I even saw a young child in the crowd." Tai Lung shrugged. "But that's of no concern to us, is it? Let them fall where they may."

Sly didn't reply.

Tai Lung's eyes glinted in the half-light. "Oh, what's this? What happened to your fighting spirit?"

Sly glared at him silently.

"It's true what they say about you, you know," Tai Lung continued. "Your skills may be impressive, but you always have been an empathetic _fool_. It escapes me how you made it this far into your career with such a glaring weakness..." He took another sip of tea. "But it's certainly useful for shutting you up."

* * *

Far below, clutching a champagne glass filled with sparkling water, was Judy Hopps.

She stuck to one corner, fidgeting with the clasps of her dress uniform. Every so often, one of the guests would come up and talk to her, commending her for her work and her bravery. She managed to put on smiles and chat to them politely – Assistant Mayor Isabelle struck her as particularly nice – but eventually they all would move on, leaving Judy alone again. She honestly wasn't sure what was worse.

"Well, you look like you're having fun."

Judy turned absently – and almost jumped when she saw it was Carmelita. "Ah! Carmelita! I, uh, haven't seen you since I... I mean..." She shrank. "I didn't –"

Carmelita raised a hand. "Easy. I'm not going to yell at you."

"You're not?"

"Of course not. This is hardly the place... and it's not like I have the high ground."

Judy smiled dismally. "Thank you."

"Besides," said Carmelita, looking over the lobby, "I hear there was enough yelling this morning."

Judy cringed. "Nick... told you?"

"Barely. No details. He's been quiet all day."

"Right..."

They lapsed into silence. Eventually Carmelita spoke. "I used to hate these things."

"What, parties?"

"Sometimes an Interpol agent will find herself at a... _soirée_. Either because it's a target for criminals, or it's being held by one. A lowlife with money loves to show it off." She sighed. "I can interrogate a stranger, no problem. Making small talk with them, not so much. Even parties I actually _choose_ to go to can be hard. As much as I hate to admit it, I suddenly found them much more fun when I went with... our mutual friend."

Judy blinked. "Um... why are you telling me this?"

"Maybe this is my attempt at small talk. Or maybe I'm still in detective mode – because I'm always in detective mode – and I'm trying to work out what the story is with your plus-one."

Judy sighed, eyes low. "Well, since you ask... sort of... the story is I don't have one."

"No-one to bring?"

"Something like that."

For a few moments, they both watched Nick on the other side of the room, breezily conversing with people neither of them had ever seen before. Carmelita spoke somewhat abruptly. "Judy, can I ask you a blunt question?"

"Sure."

"Do you have _any_ friends aside from Nick?"

"What?! Of course I do!" Judy counted off on her fingers. "There's... Clawhauser, definitely. I don't know if I can really call Chief Bogo a 'friend', but, he's there. Oh, Mrs Otterton! I can totally count her. And... I saved this woman once, and she named me the godmother of her child. We meet up sometimes! But not too often, because her dad's..." Judy remembered who she was talking to. "...busy with his job...?"

"So about three and a half," Carmelita said flatly.

"There's more!" protested Judy, but not much else was forthcoming. " _My parents call me a lot_ ," didn't seem like the sweeping counterargument she needed.

"It's okay," said Carmelita. "I'm asking because... well, I was the same. Honestly, I still am."

Carmelita looked out over the crowd. She watched the movement of people calmly, coldly, but her voice was soft.

"Being a cop is hard to begin with. But when you need to 'prove yourself', when some _ridiculous_ barrier is stacked against you... you either give up, or try harder. Both of us tried harder. Always take pride in that. But to do that, something has to suffer. It can't be your fitness or your sleep, because if you aren't in top physical condition, you won't progress. The same goes for your grades, and any skill you'll need to excel. There's only one thing left to abandon: your social life. When I say my shock pistol is my most reliable friend, people think it's a joke. It _is_ a joke. But it's one that happens to be true."

Judy shifted. "I mean... I don't have it so bad."

"You don't have it _good_ , either. Judy, I met you just two days ago, and in that time you've shown yourself to be intelligent, charming, and stupidly brave." Carmelita smiled wryly. "I think you deserve a little more than four and a half friends."

"You... might have a point there," said Judy to her glass. "But I don't know what to tell you."

"Yeah, that's the really sad part," replied Carmelita. "I don't know what to tell you, either."

They stood in silence for a few moments, looking over the party. Judy was about to say something when a woman with a soft voice cleared her throat behind them.

"Excuse me... you're Officer Judy Hopps, yes?"

* * *

Scar stood at the display of prehistoric times. He regarded the jaguar, standing on four legs. He stared morosely at its feral snarl.

"The age of savagery," he intoned. "The age of brute strength. Dark times indeed. When the brilliance of a man's brain meant little compared to the sharpness of his teeth. Thank goodness for the flow of history. More and more, the world moves away from strength and toward intellect." He broke into a smirk. "Good news for you and I, no?"

Nick took a sip of soda from his champagne glass. "It's pretty creepy when you start talking without turning around. Were you just... hoping it was me?"

"I saw you reflected in the glass."

"Oh. Right."

Scar turned, green eyes gleaming. "Good evening, Nicholas. Enjoying the festivities?"

"Hey, you know me. I'm at home anywhere someone's serving free drinks. What about you? How are you finding it?"

Scar took a breath, as though physically savouring the atmosphere. "Marvellous. This will be a marvellous night, I think."

"Yeah," said Nick. "I'm sure."

"Excuse me, gentlemen. I hope I'm not interrupting anything."

Nick turned, then grinned. "Tori! Good to see you!"

"Good to see you as well!" Toriel's dress was a similar shade of indigo as her usual attire, and only somewhat more formal. She was never one for ostentatious clothing.

She smiled warmly at Nick. Then – because she had to – she turned to Scar. Scar and Toriel were both very good at smiling on command, so Nick knew that the atrocious grins they fired at each other were entirely intentional failures.

"Mrs Dreemurr," said Scar, "to what do we owe the... pleasure?"

"Mr Kifalme," said Toriel, "rest assured I won't intrude on you for long. I was just wondering if either of you had seen my son. He went off to look at the exhibits, and I'm afraid I'm not entirely sure where he is."

"Your son is your plus-one?" said Scar, one eyebrow very slightly raised. "You chose to bring an eight year old child to this event?"

"Asriel loves the museum," said Toriel, very calmly, "and I saw nothing wrong with bringing him. He's quite mature for his age. Rest assured, I would never subject the public to the conduct of a spoiled child."

Toriel watched Scar and Scar watched Toriel and Nick stood between them, enjoying his drink and the free entertainment, and finally Scar frowned and looked at his cane.

Satisfied, Toriel turned to Nick. "Your friend Judy very kindly volunteered to search the back rooms. Still, I thought it would be worthwhile to check with you."

"Sorry, haven't seen him. I'll keep an eye out, though."

"Thank you. He's probably fine, but a parent can never be too careful. Something you'll appreciate when you have children of your own."

Nick chuckled. "' _When_ '? Tori, you mispronounced _'in the extremely unlikely event that'_."

"We all live in hope, Nick," she smiled. "If I don't run into you again tonight, do enjoy the rest of your evening." With that she left.

Scar glared at her back, his mouth curling. "Good lord. I swear, she bandies that child around everywhere. He's practically a mascot. And the public _eats_ it up." He scoffed. "The young voters have nicknamed her 'Goat Mom'. Such childish ineloquence."

Nick decided against asking if Scar's sourness stemmed from the fact those same youth voters had nicknamed him 'Creepy Uncle'.

Instead, he just smiled. "I'd better go check on my plus–one. She doesn't really know anyone here, so I wouldn't want to abandon her for too long. Enjoy yourself, Scar." He kept his smirk perfectly in place. "Oh, and... stay out of trouble. I have my eye on you, buddy."

"I can't imagine why," said Scar smoothly. "Perhaps your attention should focused elsewhere." Then – after a final disdainful glance in Toriel's general direction – he floated away.

* * *

Peridot sat and watched.

She was across the street in an old office – just close enough to access the museum's systems. She cycled through the security cameras, keeping two squinting eyes on everything that happened.

On a second monitor was a display of the city. Digital markers signified banks throughout every district, and some were flashing red. This was her employer's genius idea for a smokescreen. Peridot was remotely triggering the banks' alarm systems. Every so often, she'd turn away from the main monitor to activate a new one. They were all false alarms, which the ZPD would no doubt realise very quickly; but they were obligated by law to check every one. It should be more than sufficient to keep the police busy for the duration of the heist. Peridot idly mused that tonight would be an excellent time to actually rob a bank. Perhaps some petty gang had gotten lucky with their choice of date.

But she had no time for hypothetical crime – she had to focus on the crimes she was actually committing. She watched a feed of Okonkwo – resplendent in his sharp black suit and dark purple tie – walking down a hallway with O'Donnell. Two wolves flanked them, one brown and one black. The group arrived at the main storage unit.

Showtime.

* * *

Okonkwo stepped into the vault, and after a moment he emerged, holding a small box in both hands. An elegant black cloth was draped over it, but its contents were obvious. The diamond.

He smiled down at it. "At last. Time to move this to the display."

There was an electric crackle. Okonkwo looked up to see the shock pistol aimed squarely at his head – and behind it, O'Donnell's smirk.

"Sorry, _boss_. I can't let you do that."

* * *

"Asriel? You around here?"

Judy wandered through the halls of the museum. She had jumped at the chance to search for Toriel's son, since it gave her the perfect excuse to leave the party. Even still, the last few hours weighed heavily on her, and she couldn't apply her usual energy to the task.

She heard voices and headed that direction. She turned a corner, then hurriedly jumped back behind the corner because the wolf from the security checks was pointing Carmelita's gun at Mr Okonkwo.

Judy carefully peeked around the wall, easily picking up the conversation.

"I wouldn't try anything stupid," O'Donnell was saying. "I tested this thing on the coffee machine in the employee lounge, and, well, you don't have a coffee machine any more."

The two other wolves had grabbed Okonkwo at the elbows. The black one opened the box and tossed the diamond to O'Donnell, who caught it with his free hand.

Okonkwo wasn't pleased, certainly, but he seemed to be handling being mugged by his own security chief fairly well. He was giving O'Donnell a steely glare. "What is this?"

"I got a better deal. They offered me what I couldn't refuse: money." O'Donnell slipped the diamond into a pocket inside his jacket, keeping the pistol steady. "I know it's real unprofessional of me to go back on a contract like this..."

"Illegal, in fact."

"Yeah, sure. But the Cooper Gang is offering me way more than you ever could. Astro _nom_ ical sums."

Judy blinked. That didn't add up. Hiring someone else to do the stealing _for_ them didn't fit their profile at all.

"Do you really think it's wise to expect pay from thieves?" said Okonkwo.

"Maybe not, but the hefty advance they already sent me is pretty convincing. And once the cash comes in, there'll be a cut for my whole team. Ain't that right, boys?"

Judy's face hardened. She couldn't let this continue. She readied herself – and suddenly stopped. She knew how powerful that pistol was; she had seen what it did to Banzai. The blasts it fired were almost as big as Judy herself. And O'Donnell was an unknown. How good were his reflexes? His aim? Would he hesitate to shoot an officer, or would he just...?

Judy shook her head, surprised at herself. Where were these thoughts coming from? She should have stepped in by now.

Down the hallway, O'Donnell's phone played a snippet of music – a dramatic violin sting. He smirked. "Ah. Gimme a second." Keeping the pistol on Okonkwo, he took out his phone and read the text message he had just received.

 **Got the diamond? Bring it to the lobby and you'll get what's coming to you.  
**  
O'Donnell paused for a moment.

Then he burst out laughing.

The two guards shared a look. "You... okay, boss?"

"Oh, I'm fine!" said O'Donnell cheerily. "But Cooper's an _idiot_. Says that if I give him the diamond I'll 'get what's coming to me'. As if that isn't the oldest trick in the goddamn book."

"He's gonna betray you?"

"Nope. I ain't giving him the chance." O'Donnell pocketed his phone. "He'll pay for trying to cross me! Literally, if possible..." He drew the walkie-talkie strapped to his belt. "This is O'Donnell. Everybody group up with me. Cooper's heading for the lobby; as soon as he shows up, we're taking him out." He jogged away; the opposite direction from Judy, luckily. "You two stay here."

"Wait," called the black wolf, still clutching Okonkwo's arm, "what do we do with him?"

O'Donnell didn't slow down. "Don't care!"

He disappeared around the corner. The two wolves shared a look.

"...Broom closet?"

"Broom closet."

"Don't you dare," said Okonkwo flatly.

With O'Donnell – and more importantly, the shock pistol – gone, Judy recovered and sprang into action. She sprinted towards the guards, covering most of the distance before she was noticed. The black wolf's ear twitched, and he whirled around just as Judy leapt at his chest. She slammed her foot into him and he fell back, wheezing.

His colleague growled, releasing Okonkwo to draw a taser. He narrowed his eyes, focusing on Judy – which left him completely unprepared for Okonkwo's fist slamming into his head. He fell against the wall with a yelp.

Okonkwo calmly shook the feeling back into his hand. "Traitorous _and_ inept. Hardly worth what I was paying."

Judy checked both guards, but neither was an immediate threat. She turned to Okonkwo. "Are you alright?"

"I'm fine, though I fear worse is to come. Don't worry about me. The priority is –"

"The diamond!"

"No," he said firmly. "It's the guests. If I lose the diamond, so be it – but we cannot allow any innocents to come to harm."

Judy stood tall. "I'll help any way I can."

"Thank you." He knelt down to better speak to her. "Tell me, is Nick here?"

"He is," said Judy, trying to stay focused, "as well as Inspector Fox, from Interpol."

"Excellent. Please call them. Since O'Donnell and his team are no longer... of use, I'll need your help in escorting everyone outside."

"An evacuation?"

"Essentially, yes. But if you could tell the guests it's for the 'firework show', I would appreciate it."

Judy nodded. Clearly Okonkwo was trying to preserve his reputation, but it was a smart move nonetheless. Preventing a panic would help to keep everyone safe.

She had a feeling the cover story wouldn't last.

* * *

Sly and Tai Lung watched from above as the lobby began to empty. Okonkwo, Judy, Nick and Carmelita gently herded the guests out the front door. The crowd moved faster and more efficiently than a throng of slightly tipsy rich people might be expected to – perhaps sensing the undercurrent of urgency Okonkwo was doing his best to hide.

Tai Lung finished his tea. "Well, look at this. The ants are all scuttling away."

Sly glared. "Look. I don't know what you're planning –"

"That's right!" grinned Tai Lung. "You _don't_. So spare me the heroic speech."

Behind him, he heard the dart gun whirr to life as Peridot activated it – right on cue. Now all he had to do was hold Sly's attention.

"The time for waiting has passed." Tai Lung stood, easily balancing on the thin rafter. As he rose, he discarded his teacup. Sly watched it tumble past the chandelier and down into the now empty lobby. It shattered into tiny pieces upon meeting the cold marble floor.

"I'd like to say you were a worthy opponent, raccoon," continued Tai Lung, "but ultimately you were as weak as the rest. Had I my way, you'd already be dead. But my employer has chosen to subject you to something _far_ worse. Soon, you'll be _wishing_ I had killed you – that is, if you sti–"

Without warning, the dart gun snapped upwards and fired. It hit its target with perfect accuracy, slamming into the grey fur of his neck.

Sly tensed instinctively, eyes wide with shock.

He stared at the dart which had hit Tai Lung.


	19. ON&D P2: Please Do Not Touch The Exhibit

Tai Lung numbly raised a hand to the dart piercing his neck. He tore it out, staring at it.

"What? But... I'm..."

With a sudden choke, his body spasmed. He lost his footing and fell from the rafters, his limp body hurtling past the chandelier.

Sly wasted no time. Before Tai Lung hit the ground, Sly leapt over to the dart gun and smashed it with his cane. The machine sagged, and the remaining darts began to slide harmlessly out of the barrel. Hanging off the gun's frame, Sly grabbed them and carefully placed them into the pouch on his leg. Better than letting them lie around.

Tai Lung was already back on his feet, but he was stumbling and wobbling, as though dizzy. Sly watched him from above as he roared and growled to himself.

Suddenly Tai Lung's head snapped up. He'd noticed something. He ran on all fours, eyes wild, snarl feral.

Sly looked over and saw the lone figure who had entered the lobby.

Asriel.

Small. Vulnerable. Too terrified to move.

Sly inhaled sharply.

At least this would make a good story.

He kicked off the wall and ignored the rush of air, focusing entirely on Tai Lung, matching his path and preparing himself and landing on Tai Lung's back and hooking his cane toward the leopard's neck and missing and getting his mouth instead and apparently that would have to do.

Tai Lung's claws cut through the air just in front of Asriel's green dress shirt. He snarled and bucked, pulled back at the last moment. He ignored Sly's cane, now hooked against his back teeth, still scrabbling toward the young goat.

Asriel was staring in terror at Tai Lung, transfixed. Sly caught his attention. "Hey, kid," he said, slipping easily into a smirk. He kept impeccable balance on the leopard's back. "This jerk bothering you?"

Tai Lung reared suddenly, knocking Sly to the floor. He turned, a deep growl in his throat.

"You alright, pal?" Sly shuffled backwards, slowly but steadily, ready to dodge. "You look a little... ill."

Tai Lung stared him down. Then he broke into a grin, which seemed freakish under his wild eyes. When he spoke, it was coarse, strained. Words were an effort.

" _Kill_ you... _slow_ ly..."

Then Murray punched him in the side of the head.

Tai Lung stumbled, woozy, and Murray tackled him, driving him back. Bentley wheeled up. "Sly! Do you have that green bomb I gave you?"

"Uh, yeah?"

"It emits a sedative. I doubt it'll be that effective, but it should buy us some time."

"Right!"

Murray stopped short and Tai Lung kept going, tumbling into the display built into the floor. Sly took out the bomb, threw it up, and knocked it into the exhibit with his cane. It started diffusing a cloud of green gas before it landed.

The fact Tai Lung didn't immediately jump out of the hole was proof it worked.

Sly looked over to Asriel. "You alright, kid?"

Asriel blinked. "Uh, yes! I am! Thank you!"

Sly smiled. "No problem." He turned to the others. "About time you showed up."

"Sorry," said Bentley. "We had lay low while Okonkwo evacuated the guests."

"But now the citizens are safely out of the way!" declared Murray. "So we're free to kick some –" At this point Murray remembered the young child staring up at him in awe. "–face! Kick some bad guys right in the face."

"Great save, Murray," said Sly flatly.

"Asriel!"

The gang looked up. Toriel was running toward them from the front door.

"My child! Are you alright?"

"Mom!" He met her, hugging her tightly. She returned it, clearly relieved. "I'm okay! He saved me!"

"He... did?" Toriel looked up to Sly, her emotions mixed.

Sly shrugged. "Don't sweat it. It's not like I charge a fee."

Toriel let out a breath. "Thank you. Sincerely. I can't..."

"Happy to help," said Sly, more gently. "But you two should get out of here. It's not safe."

Toriel nodded. Still clutching Asriel by the shoulders, she turned to leave.

Sly watched her go. "Y'know, she reminded me really strongly of my mom."

"Yeah," said Murray. "Me too."

Sly's brow furrowed. "Murray... I thought you told me you never met your mother."

"I am _freaking out, man_ ," Murray whispered fearfully.

Toriel hurried Asriel toward the front door – and O'Donnell. He smiled politely and stepped to one side. "Right this way, ma'am. We'll handle this."

Sly showed Bentley a dart. "Tai Lung got tagged with one of these before he flipped out. It looks like yours."

"It is," confirmed Bentley gravely. "Yes... I remember him taking some when he attacked us on the train. The other gang must have removed my tranquillizer and replaced it with Night Howler extract."

"So they betrayed their own guy in order to frame us for using a chemical weapon." Sly glared at the dart. "I'm disgusted on _multiple_ levels right now."

"Uh, guys?" said Murray, looking around. "Maybe we should be disgusted later..."

The lobby was filling with wolves, slowly advancing from every entrance. The Cooper Gang instinctively bunched up as they were surrounded. "Where were these guys thirty seconds ago...?" muttered Sly.

O'Donnell strode towards them, hands in his pockets. "Hey, Cooper! How dumb do I look to you?"

"Well, that depends," said Sly. "Do you _actually_ only have one eye, or do you just wear that eyepatch because you think it makes you look cooler? Also, better question: who are you?"

O'Donnell growled. "Don't you dare play dumb!" He came to a stop between the gang and the floor display. "You ain't about to backstab _me._ "

"Um, Bentley," said Murray, "you forget to tell us something?"

"Honestly, I'm as lost as you."

"Liars, all of you!" O'Donnell levelled the shock pistol at Sly. "I don't need your deal to turn a profit. Maybe the ZPD'll give me a nice bounty for you. And if they won't, I'm sure there's someone else who will."

Anger flashed in Sly's eyes. "Where did you get that?"

O'Donnell blinked. "What? Who cares?! You should worry about where it's pointing! You're in for a world of pain, son – or my name isn't Wolf O'Donnell!"

"Oh god, is it?"

* * *

Peridot watched the lobby.

Her employer was right, as ever. O'Donnell had reacted exactly as anticipated to the fake texts Peridot had sent him. First, full cooperation due to his greed; then defiance when he sensed a betrayal. Things were falling into place.

She checked the external cameras. Scar stood alone, watching as Toriel lead her son outside. Peridot nodded, satisfied her employer was safe.

Their original plan – to valiantly reclaim the Nope Diamond from a vicious band of thieves – was still on track. It always had been. It had just been adjusted so that the Cooper Gang were the scapegoats. Of course, they wouldn't exactly be pleased about that.

But soon they'd be too dead to object.

* * *

Outside, the crowd was milling around; restless but safe. The three cops were speaking to Okonkwo.

"So your _entire_ security team betrayed you?" said Carmelita.

"I'm afraid so. They answer to O'Donnell, not me. I should have been more careful."

"Forget about it," said Nick. "Let's just focus on sorting this out. We're your security team now, so is there any equipment you can give us?"

Okonkwo handed him a pair of handcuffs.

Nick blinked. "Is... that it?"

Okonkwo nodded.

"Phe _nom_ enal."

Judy's ear pricked. Within the throng, Asriel was talking, unable to keep his voice down. The nearby guests were pretending they weren't listening. Judy motioned to Nick and Carmelita, then headed towards him.

"I mean it, Mom! There's some kind of... monster!"

"I believe you, sweetheart." Toriel was kneeling down, gently patting his head. "But it might be wise to stay quiet for now"

"Actually," said Judy as she jogged up, "we'd like to hear from him. If he's up for it."

"I'm fine, really!" Asriel seemed more than fine; fear had already given way to excitement. Even still, he lowered his voice as he spoke. "He... looked like that criminal who's been in the news. The snow leopard."

"Tai Lung?"

"Yeah, him. But... there was something wrong with him. His eyes were funny. And he was so _angry_..."

Judy, Nick and Carmelita shared a silent look.

They couldn't say it aloud, in the middle of a crowd.

They couldn't say _'Tai Lung is on Night Howlers'_.

Carmelita began to impatiently pace behind them. Nick exhaled slowly. Judy shook her head, then turned back to Asriel. "And you're sure you're okay?"

"Yeah! He saved me! He jumped down from nowhere and landed on his back and stopped him just in time and –"

"Woah, woah, slow down," said Nick gently. "Who was this?"

"The other thief!"

Carmelita abruptly stopped pacing. "...Cooper?"

"Yeah! Him!" By now Asriel was gently vibrating. "He's amazing!"

"I recognize that the testimony of a child is probably unreliable," said Toriel. "But I know my son. He means every word."

"I believe him," said Judy. "Although I wish I didn't..." By now Okonkwo had joined them, looking over the crowd with mild concern. She turned to him. "Mr Okonkwo, I... have to go inside."

"I see."

Nick sighed angrily. "Guess it's that time of the night, huh? In steps action hero Judy Hopps..."

"Nick..." Judy watched him wistfully. "I appreciate your concern."

"No you don't," he muttered.

" _No_ ," snapped Carmelita, "she doesn't." When Nick and Judy both gave her a confused look, she continued. "Nobody has time to appreciate anybody's concern. Wake up, kids. I don't know if you've noticed, but back-up _isn't_ coming. We have to contain this incredibly dangerous, potentially _dea_ –"

Okonkwo coughed.

Carmelita shot him a glare. "...contain this _situation_ ourselves. Judy, I'm going with you. Nick, you can either guard the crowd or join us. What you _can't_ do is wallow in whatever petty drama you two have gotten yourselves into. You're cops. _Act like it._ "

Judy nodded. "...Thank you, Carmelita. I needed that."

"Yeah. You did."

Nick clenched and unclenched a fist, painfully aware of how long his decision was taking. "I'll come too," he blurted out.

"Fine. Let's not waste any more time. We have work to do."

Toriel watched them sprint away. "Will they be okay?"

"Don't worry," said Okonkwo. "My security team is on the scene. I'm sure everything will be fine."

He neglected to clarify that the two sentences were unrelated.

* * *

O'Donnell kept the shock pistol steady. "Since I'm such a generous individual, I'll give you the chance to surrender peacefully. Drop your weapons before I change my mind."

Behind him, a large paw rose out of the display. Sly noticed, then met O'Donnell's gaze. "Hey, pal? I'd recommend putting that thing down."

Wolf snorted. "Is that a fact? Gonna go with 'no' on that one, _pal._ "

Sly shrugged. "Alright. I tried."

Tai Lung climbed into view. His unfocused eyes fell on the shock pistol – and he stiffened.

He _remembered_ the shock pistol.

With a feral roar, he exploded upwards and flew toward O'Donnell. The wolf started. "What the **heck–**?!"

Tai Lung slammed into his back. They crashed against the polished floor. The pistol left O'Donnell's hand – and the Nope Diamond flew out of his pocket. Both slid along the ground toward the Cooper Gang.

Tai Lung punched and slashed at O'Donnell, furious but inelegant. A wolf ran up and tackled him, and was soon joined by several more. Tai Lung twisted and bucked, dislodging them. O'Donnell crawled away, but didn't try to flee. Instead, he drew the knife he had holstered in his boot, since he was exactly the kind of person to keep a knife holstered in his boot.

Sly crouched down, grabbing the diamond and Carmelita's gun. "Well, that was surprisingly easy. Let's go!"

"Are we going to abandon the guards to their fate?" asked Bentley, as Tai Lung threw one wolf into four others.

"Uh... I guess so."

"Cool. Just checking." He pointed to the front door. "I'd suggest leaving that way. This isn't a fight I want to try to wander through."

"Agreed."

They ran. Two wolves, who until then had hung back from Tai Lung, stood in their way. "Hey, you can't–!" Murray punched them both in the face and the gang didn't slow.

They made it to the front door, and almost crashed into Carmelita, Judy and Nick. Judy gasped and Carmelita glowered at Sly and Sly smiled nervously and Murray glanced between them and Bentley frowned and Nick glared at Bentley and pointedly put his sunglasses back on.

"Well," said Sly. "Hi there."

"Don't you 'hi there' **me** , Sly Cooper!" snapped Carmelita. She advanced, eyes fiery. "This ends here!"

Sly backed up, but managed a nonchalant shrug. "Guess some things never change; you've still only got eyes for me. Haven't noticed the savage snow leopard? I think he's the bigger–"

"What you _think_ ," hissed Carmelita, grabbing him by the collar, "doesn't _matter_. You had your chance to work with me. You threw it away."

"With all due respect, Sly's right," said Judy. "If Tai Lung has gone savage–"

"We'll deal with it," said Nick forcefully. "But we're dealing with the Cooper Gang, too."

Judy turned to him. "Nick, come on!"

Carmelita sighed.

"No, _you_ come on," snapped Nick, who was so focused on arresting the Cooper Gang he failed to notice Murray quietly wheeling Bentley out the door. "Can you please just act like a normal cop for one night?"

"I _am_ acting like a cop! I'm trying to protect innocent people!"

"Kinda looks like you're trying to protect guilty people, too!"

"I protect everybody!"

"That's not how it _works!_ You–"

There was a metallic screech.

A thick steel beam fell from above, right where Nick and Judy were standing. It was too fast. By the time Nick looked up and realised what was happening, he couldn't move.

Judy hadn't looked up. She heard the noise and saw the darkening shadow and immediately knew what to do.

Before it was halfway down, she was shoving Nick as hard as she could.

He was clear but she wasn't. Judy was preparing to jump backwards when Carmelita's hand closed around her shirt collar, yanking her back. The tips of her ears brushed against the beam.

The sound of the metal crashing against stone rang out, hanging in the air for a few seconds.

It was a set of bars, huge but tightly packed.

Nick, Bentley and Murray outside.

Judy, Sly and Carmelita inside.

"Is everyone okay?" called Sly.

Nick had landed heavily, his sunglasses clattering away. He blinked, then dragged himself forward. "No... nononono!" He was able to stick his arm through a gap, but that was it. "Judy! Can you fit through here?"

"Sorry, pal," said Sly, examining the bars. "Take it from a guy who crawls through tight spaces for a living. None of us are fitting through that."

Murray ran up. "Don't worry, guys! I'll have these things up in a jiffy!" He tried, unsuccessfully, to hook his fingers under the base. "Or maybe... a little longer..."

"It's no use," said Bentley. "These bars are too much, even for you. Peridot's clearly trying to use the security system to seal us in with Tai Lung. We're lucky this thing didn't come down sooner."

"Lucky? **Lucky?!** " yelled Nick. "We need to get them out, right now!"

"...Or what?"

Judy and the Cooper Gang were varying levels of tense, and Nick's paws were shaking. But Carmelita was calm, her arms folded. She almost looked bored.

"I appreciate the concern, Nick. I do. But I've been in more death traps than I can remember." She sniffed. "And this? This is amateur. Yes, we're trapped with an angry idiot hopped up on flower juice. But we're awake, we're unrestrained, and we're injured. I see a very simple way to ensure he doesn't kill us."

Judy stood tall as she realized what Carmelita meant. "We... we take him down, first! Working together, we can beat him!"

"What...?" said Nick quietly.

"I like those odds!" said Sly. "The three of us together can't lose. Besides, we'll even have the help of–"

A wolf slammed into the wall and fell to the floor and made no attempt to get up.

They turned their attention back to the fight, only to discover it wasn't much of a fight any more. All of the security team was down. Only O'Donnell was still standing, dodging Tai Lung's swiping claws and occasionally trying to strike back.

"You... you've gotta be kidding me," said Sly weakly. "There was like fifty of them a minute ago."

Bentley coughed. "We'll... go see about opening this door remotely. Come on, Murray."

"Alright!" Murray turned to Nick, still crouched against the bars. "What about you, Orange Lightning? Wanna give us a hand?"

"Um, first off, let's stick with 'Officer Wilde'. Please." Nick forced himself to stand. "And... no. You don't need my help."

"So, what?" said Sly. "You just gonna sit here and watch?"

"No!" snapped Nick. "I'm going to do my job." He looked back over his shoulder. "...I'm stopping Scar. Now."

Judy's eyes widened. "Really?"

"Yeah. I need to do _something_ – and _we_ need to shut Scar down, immediately. He's slippery. He has an intended outcome for tonight, sure, but he'll have contingency plans too. We can't let him recover."

Carmelita's eyes narrowed. "You sure you can do it?"

"I'll think of something." He frowned. "I... I can't just sit on the sidelines. I'm a cop too."

She smirked. "Yeah, you are. Teach that degenerate a lesson."

"So the mastermind is 'Scar', huh?" Sly murmured. "Interesting."

"Alright then," said Bentley, "it seems we all have our jobs. See you on the other side."

"Yeah!" Murray grinned through the bars. "I'd wish you guys luck, but I know you won't need it! Hit him once for me, wouldja?"

"Sure thing, pal."

Bentley and Murray disappeared around a corner.

Carmelita began examining Tai Lung's movements. Sly sidled up to her. "...Uh–"

"Save it." She didn't turn. "I don't want to hear any mushy stuff."

"Okay... I just–"

"Let's just focus on the practicalities of the situation, alright?!"

"Sure. It's–"

"You know me, Sly. You know how I think. So please, don't... distract me by–"

" _Carmelita_ ," said Sly. "I'm trying to give you your gun."

She blinked, finally turning. Sly was offering her the pistol. "You're right. I know you. So I know how much you'd want this back. Especially right now."

Carmelita took it slowly. The weight in her hand was comforting.

"...Thanks."

Sly smiled. "No problem."

Nick had picked up his sunglasses and was dusting them off. He glared at them absently, trying to focus himself.

Judy pressed herself against the bars. "Um, Nick?"

He looked up – and saw the fear in her expression. He crouched down across from her. "You okay?"

Judy glanced behind herself, making sure Sly and Carmelita weren't watching her. "I... I don't know!" she whispered. "I'm not sure I can do this! Earlier tonight, I... froze up!"

"What?"

"I saw that wolf holding the shock pistol, and I just... suddenly I was thinking about whether I'd get hurt, and..." She shook her head. "I've never...!"

"Okay. Listen to me." Nick reached through the bars and took a hold of her paw. "Time is short. I wish I could give you a big long speech about how amazing you are, but I can't. So instead, here's what I have."

He looked her straight in the eyes. Judy returned his gaze, gripping his hand with both paws.

"You're Judy Hopps."

She blinked. "Is... that it?"

He gave her a dry smile. "What? Do you need any more?" His smile faded. "I won't lie. I am... _relieved_ I'm on this side of the bars. If I was in there with you... I'd only slow you down. This is out of my league. But it's not out of yours. You can do this, Judy. You can, and you will. Because sometimes you can be a jerk, yeah. But leaving me without–" Nick suddenly tensed and looked at the floor. Judy squeezed his paw. He took a breath. "...But you're not enough of a jerk to leave me without a partner. You never were."

She smiled, but it didn't reach her eyes. "I'm not immortal, Nick."

"Honestly? Kinda getting the impression that you are. Have you _met_ you?" He smiled as Judy laughed.

Nick stood. "I... gotta go. Scar might..."

"Yeah." Judy reluctantly let go of his paw. "I know you can do it!"

"Thanks."

Nick backed away slowly, eyes down. He didn't bother hiding his relief when Judy called to him.

"Nick, wait! You might need this."

She passed him something through the bars.

The carrot pen.

He paused for a moment, holding it carefully. Then he nodded. "Thank you."

"No problem." She smiled as brightly as she could. "I'll see you after we win."

"Yeah," he said, trying to return it. "I'll... see you then."

Nick hesitated for a few seconds, but he was right; time was short. He turned and ran.

He immediately regretted what he hadn't said.

The three readied themselves as best they could. Sly watched Carmelita check over her pistol, then looked to Judy, who was loosening her dress-uniform's collar.

He nodded to himself. "Y'know, this is pretty great except for the fact we're all about to die."

"Oh, shut up," murmured Carmelita.

"Shutting up."

O'Donnell had persevered admirably by himself. Tai Lung was too addled to use his more powerful skills; he couldn't focus long enough to remember how to do the finger thingy that made people stop moving. But the outcome was never in doubt, especially after O'Donnell's knife was knocked right out of his grip.

Tai Lung slashed at O'Donnell's face, and the wolf hissed as the claws drew blood. Tai Lung roared and punched O'Donnell squarely in the chest; a monstrous blow. O'Donnell was knocked off his feet, breathless, and flew into a window – which shattered on impact, exploding into shards of sharpened glass. He didn't slow, speeding through the night air and crashing into a metal street-lamp with a terrible, juddering clang. He bounced off and landed on a car, which shrieked its alarm as his limp body crumpled the roof.

Wolf lay there, unmoving.

Then his eye cracked open.

"Goddamn lunatic scratched me right in the face," he muttered.

* * *

Tai Lung went up to the broken window. He paused, the noise and light of the city too much for his fevered senses.

Without warning, a thick metal grate slammed down, sealing the window. Every other window was soon covered. Tai Lung growled and began to pound his fists against the steel.

"We should hurry," noted Carmelita. "We can't let him escape. The three of us might have a chance against him, but the crowd outside _won't_."

They fanned out – Carmelita walked slowly, maintaining distance, while Sly and Judy went in opposite directions. "What's the play?" asked Sly, as quietly as he could. "Should I try to–"

Carmelita shot Tai Lung in the back of the head.

He whirled around, saw her, and roared. His rage echoed through the lobby.

Then he was sprinting toward her. Judy went right. Sly went left.

Carmelita kept firing.

Before Tai Lung reached her, Judy came in from the side, kicking him in the head. He was knocked off course, but recovered, swiping at her. Sly leapt in from behind, bringing his cane down. Without turning, Tai Lung grabbed him by the arm and flung him into a cabinet. Sly grunted as glass shattered and small fossils scattered.

Carmelita fired more blasts. Tai Lung dodged, glaring at her. Judy came in again, throwing her weight against his side.

He didn't notice.

Judy frowned. She grabbed his tail and yanked it.

He noticed that.

Tai Lung turned, roaring, and suddenly Judy was running as fast as her tiny legs could carry her. She tried a different tactic. "Listen to me!" she called, without slowing. "You're infected with Night Howler extract! It's a low dosage, so you might still be able to fight it off!

"Yeah!" added Sly, brushing glass off his shirt. "You're being played, buddy! You really going to let yourself be used like this? We're not the ones who poisoned you!"

Tai Lung grinned, his sharp teeth gleaming. " _Hah_... haha... them, later. You, first!"

"Great." Sly sprinted back into the fray. "Looks like he's just lucid enough to _enjoy_ killing us."

* * *

The crowd outside was uneven, but something of an order had emerged. Most of the assembled guests were facing Scar's general direction, because Scar had started talking very loudly and wouldn't stop.

Nick watched from a distance. He nervously played with his sunglasses, trying to order his thoughts.

" _This is nuts_. _'Shut him down'? What was I saying?! I have zero proof Scar's involved at all! The mastermind could be Toriel, for all I kno–_ "

Nick almost dropped his shades.

He froze as realization took hold of him. He was an idiot for not seeing it before – it had been staring him in the face the whole time.

Her manner of speech was similar to Scar's – to the mastermind's. She was smart enough for it. And being in the election meant Scar's alleged motivation could work for her as well.

The mastermind _could_ be Toriel.

… _Could_.

"Night Howlers! Plaguing our city yet again!" Scar was saying. "And for _what?_ So a petty thief can steal our diamond? What a _disgusting_ crime. The Cooper Gang must pay for their actions."

Asriel frowned uncertainly. "But Mom," he whispered, "I really don't think Mr Cooper did it..."

"It's okay, Asriel," she said. "I'm sure this will sort itself out soon enough. The important thing is that you're safe." He nodded.

"Alright, everyone! Could I get your attention, please?" Nick stopped next to Scar. He flashed his badge. "Hey. I'm Officer Nick Wilde, but most of you know that already."

"Ah," crooned Scar. "Good evening, Nicholas. Any leads?"

"Oh, I think I have something," murmured Nick. He raised his voice to address the crowd. "Ladies and gentlemen, I think I know who's behind this terrible crime," he said gravely. "And if I'm right, you can rest assured that the ZPD will impose the harshest possible punishments on Mr Kifalme."

Scar preened, completely prepared. "Why, Nicholas. I have no idea wh–"

Nick held up a finger without turning around. "Not you."

Scar blinked. "I – what?"

"Sorry for my ambiguous phrasing. I meant, obviously, Mufasa Kifalme," said Nick calmly. "He's the mastermind behind this all."

Scar spluttered. "Ex _cuse_ me?!"

The guests murmured confusedly. Even Okonkwo looked surprised.

Nick gave them a moment. "I know, I know. It sounds outlandish. Mufasa – environmentalist, philzoothropist, generally well-liked by everyone in Zootopia. But," he said dramatically, "that is precisely why I think he's the one behind this."

" _Or, more accurately, it's the basis of the outrageous lie I just threw together_ ," Nick thought to himself.

"Consider this," he continued. "Mufasa would be an excellent contender for mayor. He's a long-time friend of Leodore Lionheart, he's involved in the political scene, and he has an absolutely flawless public reputation. _But!_ He never even considered running. Why is that? Well, _Mufasa_ would tell you it's because he wants to focus on being a ' _husband'_ and ' _father'_. And yet, who's surging ahead in the polls other than Toriel Dreemurr – popular, not despite, but _because_ of, her image as a competent parent."

The crowd took a second to collectively turn to Toriel, who blinked.

"Um, Mom," said Asriel quietly, "what's going on...?"

"I have no idea," she murmured back.

Toriel was not the mastermind. Of course she wasn't. But Nick had enough evidence to convince a nervous crowd, however briefly, that she _could_ be; and if he could do it for her, he could do it for anyone.

He'd apologise to Mufasa later.

"No, Mufasa avoided the race for one simple reason. He wanted the Nope Diamond." Nick shrugged. "Why? Couldn't tell you. But I _can_ tell you this: nobody could run in the election _and_ plan a heist like this simultaneously. It's just too difficult. It'd take a gargantuan intellect that, simply put, no one person could ever have. Nobody I know, anyway."

"Nicholas," said Scar. His teeth were grinding. "That's _enough_. You don't honestly believe–"

"I know this is hard for you to hear," said Nick sympathetically. "Which is why I want to emphasise," he said louder, turning back to the crowd, "that this man is entirely innocent."

"What?" said Scar.

"I obviously don't have to tell _you_ that," smiled Nick, "but I want to make it clear to everybody else. It seems that, by hiring former associates of his, Mufasa was trying to subtly shift focus away from himself and onto his brother. Fiendish, really. If it's true. I'm just spitballing here. But either way, I'm certain the lion you see before you is a _simple_ , innocent bystander who had no idea what was happening."

Scar's paw shook as he gripped his cane tighter. "Mufasa is–!"

"Your brother. Of course. I know you might find this hard to accept." He shook his head. "But you never really know what someone is capable of... Isn't that right," and now for the killing blow, "Taka?"

Nick could almost hear Scar's last nerve snap.

"Listen here, you insig _nif_ icant **trash-eater!** " he roared, grabbing Nick's shirt. "Just because you conned your way through police academy does not mean for a _second_ you can speak that way! My brain-dead **brute** of a brother had _nothing_ to do with this! It was–" and then, just before the last fatal word, Scar remembered he was not alone with Nick, and was in fact being watched by a large, somewhat bemused crowd. "... probably someone else," he finished lamely.

Nick kept his expression neutral, but internally, he was smirking. Apparently the Cooper Gang were on to something when it came to irritating megalomaniacs.

He calmly brushed off Scar's paw. "Sorry. Kinda looks like a hit a nerve there." He produced the carrot pen, letting Scar see it. "Maybe we can discuss this somewhere more... private? I'd like to get an official statement."

Scar drew himself up. He was holding his cane tightly. "...Yes. Of course. As you wish."

* * *

Tai Lung's claws kicked up sparks against the stone floor as he barrelled toward Carmelita. She kept firing, but he didn't slow. She growled and rolled out of his path – but he turned and grabbed her by the throat, slamming her into the ground.

Sly yelled, jumping onto his back and hammering his cane into the leopard's head. "Let her go! **Now!** " Tai Lung released Carmelita to focus on dislodging Sly, and Judy ran in, kicking him in the stomach.

Tai Lung lost his balance – but recovered. He punched Sly, sending him sliding along the floor. Leaving Carmelita where she lay, he ran at Judy, who sprinted away.

Sly groaned, then put a finger to his ear. "How's that door coming, Bentley?"

Nothing.

"Oh, right," he said, standing. "They don't have their earpieces. Well, at least they won't have to hear me die."

"Less... words..." huffed Judy, barely keeping ahead of Tai Lung. "More... fight...!" Sly jumped in, whacking Tai Lung with his cane. He snarled and began to chase him, abandoning Judy, who leaned against a wall. " _Thankyou_...!"

Carmelita growled to herself as she stood. "Dammit! He's gonna wear us out. We just can't hit him hard enough!"

Judy craned her head back as she tried to catch her breath – and her eyes widened.

"The chandelier!" she yelled. "If we time it right, we could...!"

"Of course!" Carmelita fired a few rounds at Tai Lung, then brought her pistol up. She frowned. "I don't have a clear shot at its moorings!"

"Leave that to me!" called Sly, still sprinting. "I can climb up and unhook it..." He dodged Tai Lung's claws, slid under his legs, and ran. It only bought him a few seconds before the leopard was back on his tail. "If you can keep this jerk off me!"

"Be right there!" said Judy.

She took a deep breath, readying herself. Then she cringed.

"Sorry, Mr Okonkwo..."

* * *

Nick led Scar around the side of the museum, away from the crowd. Scar trailed behind him, examining the walls. Security cameras were everywhere; yet another testament to Okonkwo's thoroughness.

No matter. Peridot would delete the footage.

As he twisted the top of his cane, Nick spoke without turning around. "Sorry for causing a scene back there. I guess I got a little excited." He shrugged at a window. "I'm still just getting the hang of this police stuff, y'know?"

"Forget it, Nicholas. You have other concerns."

Scar silently drew the thin sword hidden in his cane, preparing to strike.

"I'm ready to make my _statement_."


	20. ON&D P3: Blood! BLOOD! And, Deathhhhhh!

Nick was looking through a museum window, no doubt concerned with the fight inside. Scar slipped into a fencing stance, aiming the tip of his sword at Nick's back.

All it would take was one blow through the chest.

He lunged, his blade cutting through the air – and Nick leaned easily to one side.

Scar was left staring in shock at his own reflection. Nick had seen him in the glass.

Growling, Scar pushed away his panic and whirled around. He had to kill him quickly. He brought his sword down in a sweeping slash – and Nick side-stepped it, utterly calm.

Scar's sword bounced against the ground and in an instant, Nick grabbed his wrist with both paws and twisted it viciously. Scar choked and dropped his sword.

Without releasing him, Nick slammed his weight against Scar's knee and the lion lost his balance. Nick brought Scar's arm behind his back as he pushed him into the ground.

Then, the sound of handcuffs.

Nick walked around to address Scar's face. "Taka Kifalme, you are under arrest. You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say can be used against you in court. You have the right to consult with an attorney and to have that attorney present during questioning. If you are indigent, an attorney will be provided to you at no cost." Nick broke into a smile. "I mean, I doubt you're going to stay silent, or ask for legal counsel – and you're definitely not indigent – but I gotta be thorough. No loopholes for you to wiggle through. So now that we have that officially covered, allow me to say, informally and off the record: _boom_."

Scar blinked. "I... what...?"

Nick looked over to where Scar's sword had fallen. "A cane-sword? God. Of course you of all people actually _own_ a cane-sword. What was the plan, here? Were you gonna try to pin my murder on Cooper, too? Or just skip town? Pretty flimsy either way. This is why you shouldn't make decisions in the heat of the moment."

Scar's face twisted in rage. "This can't be – what – you're just a–!"

Nick laughed lightly. "Look, I don't blame ya. Plenty of dumb thugs have made the same mistake – guess you're in good company. Truth is, anybody partnered up with the best cop in the city isn't gonna look like much in comparison. Especially a lanky fox who doesn't seem to know what he's doing." He leaned down, close to Scar's face. "But let's make one thing clear: I am also a cop. Which means I _also_ cleared training, which means I _also_ can take down a hostile animal several times my size. Wouldn't have a badge if I couldn't." He stood straight, his smirk triumphant. "Not that I'm gonna be bragging about this. You couldn't stab your way out of a wet paper bag, Taka. Your kid nephew could beat you in a fight."

Scar stared at him. Then he recovered, growling furiously. "You **imbecile!** Do you think this is over?"

Nick made a show of thinking it over. "Hmm... Yes! Yes I do."

"Aren't you forgetting something? Some _one?_ "

"Well shucks, I don't think so..." Nick counted off his fingers. " _You're_ an idiot who just got himself arrested. Tai Lung's fighting the two greatest cops I've ever met – andsomeguy – so he's more or less dealt with. Oh! And Peridot's about to betray you."

"What?!"

Nick pointed to a security camera. "She's watching, right? She must be. She's the one organising this whole thing while you swan around and sip champagne. The one doing the actual work. The one who _always_ wants to do the smart thing."

"Peridot," said Scar whitely. "Turn off the feed."

"Up until about a minute ago, seemed like the smart thing to do was listen to you. You have a way with words, I'll admit. You can come off as real intelligent." Nick grimaced playfully. "But _this_ isn't a great look. On the ground, handcuffed... mud on your fancy suit..."

"Peridot!" snapped Scar. "I can _tell_ you're still watching! Delete this footage immediately!"

"Oh, but she won't. She won't, because she has logs. Data. She can tell us everything." Nick flashed the camera a friendly smile. "And she will. Because a plea bargain can really reduce a criminal sentence these days. And _that's_ the smart thing to do."

Scar couldn't glare at the camera and Nick at the same time. His eyes were green fire.

"You wanna know the _best_ part?" said Nick cheerily. "You coulda just walked away. Really. You were right to be smug – I had nothing! All you had to do was stand there and _not_ freak out as I tried to press your buttons." He sighed. "But if you were capable of prioritising your goals above your fragile ego for more than five seconds, would you still be Taka quote-unquote '''Scar''' Kifalme?"

"Let's suppose you're right, Nicholas," spat Scar. "Perhaps you've won. Enjoy it while you can. Because you won't be smirking when you're identifying what's _left_ of your precious little partner for the _morgue_."

Nick's smile faded. "Yeah. That would be... Yeah." He turned to look through the window. "So it's a good thing I won't have to do that. She'll be fine."

Scar scoffed. "Don't delude yourself. She–"

"–is _Judy Hopps_ ," said Nick firmly. "You have the right to remain silent, Taka. I suggest you use it."

* * *

Judy ran and ran and kept running. Tai Lung was right behind her – she could almost feel his breath. But she stayed ahead. Now that they had an actual plan, Judy was able to push past any fatigue that threatened her.

Just a little longer.

Sly was climbing as quickly as he could. He had already reached one of the long chains curving up to the chandelier's moorings. He'd be there soon.

Just a _little_ longer.

Judy slipped and suddenly Tai Lung was upon her. She rolled out of the way of his fist, but he was too close. Far too close.

Carmelita leapt in, wrapping an arm around his neck. She fired her pistol, point-blank, into the back of his head. Tai Lung roared and staggered back, giving Judy time to scramble away.

Tai Lung reared and flailed and finally caught Carmelita by the jacket. He flung her and she flew. She slammed into a thick stone pillar and hissed in pain. She fell to the floor, her pistol falling from her grip.

Judy's eyes widened. She glanced up – Sly was ready, but Tai Lung wasn't in position.

"Hey, **jerk!** " She sprinted forward, face hard. "Over here!"

Carmelita took a second to clutch at her side – the impact was painful, but it would pass soon. Hopefully. She looked up to see Judy and Tai Lung running for each other. She blinked. "What – Judy, no!"

They converged under the chandelier. Tai Lung leapt for her, claws out – and Judy slipped under him. She grabbed his tail and skidded to a stop. He whirled around and swiped at her, and she dodged, keeping a tight grip on his tail. He snarled, focusing on her as she danced around him.

Watching from above, Sly realised this was their only shot. They weren't going to get another chance. With a heavy sigh, he cut the connection between the chandelier and the ceiling. Sly had just enough time to mentally form the words " _Well I guess this is happening_ " before gravity took him and he was falling with the chandelier, hurtling to the floor. He braced himself as best he could and quickly reached for his pouch.

"Judy!" shouted Carmelita, forcing herself to stand. " **Move!** "

Judy didn't let go.

Tai Lung heard something and looked up. When he saw the falling chandelier, his eyes focused. For a second he looked lucid.

It crashed.

"Judy!" Carmelita pushed herself forward. She left her pistol where it lay.

She came to the chandelier. The metal was warped in places and much of the beautiful glass was spread over the floor. Tai Lung's hand stuck out from under the frame. It twitched.

Nothing else moved.

Carmelita tensed – and Judy rolled into view, beaming brightly.

"We did it!" she yelled. "We – yeah!"

Carmelita felt relief pour into her. She started to laugh and Judy joined in. Judy went in for a high-five and to Carmelita's own surprise she pulled the rabbit into a hug.

After a moment, she caught herself and pulled away. "Um... good job... soldier...!" She awkwardly punched Judy's shoulder.

"Thanks, Carmelita. You too." Judy's smile faded as she realised something. "Wait, where's Sly?"

There was a cough.

They shared a look, then ran to the other side of the wreckage.

Sly was on his side, slowly dragging himself along the floor. An ugly red stain ran down his shirt, dark and wet. He noticed Carmelita and Judy and gave them a lopsided grin. The white of his teeth was a sharp contrast to the red trickling from his mouth.

"Good job, guys...! Let's..." Another cough. "...take the day off tomorrow..."

Judy gasped, her eyes widening. Carmelita just stared, numb.

"What?" said Sly. His voice was husky. "Is there something on–" He hissed suddenly as he repositioned himself. "...on my shirt?"

"Sly, no." Carmelita's voice was soft, shaky. "You can't."

Judy realized panic was taking hold of her. She tried to crystallize the fear into action, but it was hard. Harder than usual. "Where are you hurt? Is – is it –?"

Sly gave her a grin. "I'm sure it's nothing. Never felt –" An awkward, strained breath. "...felt better."

Carmelita wanted to go to him, to hold him, to fiercely swear that it would be okay. But for once, her instincts failed her. She just stood where she was, staring. "You... no. _Please_ , no."

"Sly, listen to me!" said Judy, taking a step forward. She had to focus. She had to ignore the fact her paws were shaking. " _Don't_ move. We'll... we'll get you help, alright? Everything's gonna be fine."

Sly kept grinning. But as he looked to Judy, then to Carmelita – her eyes terrified and slightly wet – his grin faded. He lowered his gaze, frowning quietly.

"Sly, please!" Judy struggled to keep her voice even. "Don't give up! It's _okay!_ "

"No," said Sly. "It's not."

He stood. Straightening his shirt, he turned his head to spit out some of the fake blood.

Before Judy fully realised what was happening, Sly was shoving the Nope Diamond into her hands. "Here. Take it."

He kept his eyes low as he picked up his cane. Then he simply walked away.

"Sly...?" said Carmelita. "What's...?" She blinked repeatedly, getting a hold of herself. Desolate confusion gave way to something more solid. "Get back here!"

"Wait!" called Judy. "Don't go!"

Sly paused, but he didn't turn. For a moment he stood there, ears and tail low.

Then he slammed a smoke bomb into the floor. When it cleared, he was gone.

In the silence that followed, Judy looked down at the diamond in her paws. It was still heavy.

"...Uh, Carmelita?"

"Hmm?" Carmelita was wiping her face with her sleeve. She seemed distracted.

"What... just happened?"

Carmelita sighed. She stared at where Sly had been.

"I'm... honestly not sure."

* * *

Okonkwo didn't question how his security doors, after being activated without his permission, then deactivated, also without his permission. He also didn't question how the Night Howler antidote he had prepared, previously stashed in his office, was waiting at the museum's front door. Okonkwo was a smart man. He didn't ask questions he already knew the answers to.

Nick contacted the ZPD after arresting Scar, but the first to arrive was the ambulance Okonkwo called in. Two EMTs arrived from Sacred Heart, the nearest hospital. They administered the antidote to the unconscious Tai Lung, expressed wonder at how _not_ dead he was considering the size of the chandelier which had directly struck the back of his head, and wheeled him off on a very large stretcher.

Now Okonkwo stood in the lobby, surveying the damage. The two Dreemurrs were beside him.

Toriel frowned. "Oh dear, this is quite a mess. Watch where you step, my child."

"Yes, mom."

She turned to Okonkwo. "Will the museum be alright?"

"I think so, yes," he said calmly. "We have a lot of repairs to do, certainly. We'll need to close for a day or two... unfortunate, but it should be sufficient. The exhibit will open soon enough."

"What about funds?"

"That's the good news. Everything broken was insured. Only two things are irreplaceable: the diamond, and the guests. Thankfully, both are unscathed."

"Um... Mr Okonkwo, sir?"

Okonkwo turned to give Asriel a gentle smile. "Yes, Mr Dreemurr?"

"Uh..." Asriel spoke very politely to Okonkwo's knee. "I just wanted to ask, if you don't mind... I saw on the news how you kept saying the diamond would be safe."

"Yes?"

"Well... with everyone who wanted to steal it... what made you so sure? How did you know it'd be okay?"

Okonkwo looked across the lobby. Carmelita was glaring into empty space, and Judy was talking to her. Behind them, Nick came through the door. After hesitating briefly, he fixed a smirk into place and sauntered up. They noticed him approach and he said something, pointing casually over his shoulder. Judy's face lit up and she ran to him, punching him in the arm – then caught herself, drew back, shrank. Nick winced and rubbed his arm. He saw how she was looking at him, and after a moment, he smiled. Not a smirk – something warm, genuine. She returned it.

Okonkwo turned back to Asriel, his eyes glinting.

"Well... there are two reasons."

* * *

Nick had read Peridot like a book; a small, green book which was probably about engineering or something and was MOSTLY WRITTEN IN ALLCAPS. Watching Scar lose his temper and get himself arrested made her re-evaluate her loyalty. She kept an eye on Tai Lung, but once he went down too, she knew it was over.

Might as well do the smart thing.

She sheepishly emerged from her office across the street. To show how genuine her surrender was, she firmly kept her hands high in the air at all times – until her arms got tired, at which point she went with one hand at a time.

Most of the department was still dealing with the false alarms at the banks. The officer who responded to Nick's call to have Scar and Peridot taken in was none other than Benjamin Clawhauser. Clawhauser was arresting them very slowly, to make sure he did it right. He interviewed the other guests for important intel, cleverly disguising his interrogation as excited chit-chat about their fancy clothing. He was also sipping a flute of champagne, heroically determining whether Scar had poisoned it.

Nick, Judy and Carmelita watched as he gently handcuffed Peridot, who was cackling madly.

Judy winced. "Will she be... okay...?"

"Probably just overexcited," said Carmelita. "It's a big shift for her, turning on Scar. But she'll adjust." She turned to Nick, smiling quietly. "Great work. As ever."

"You're one to talk," said Nick calmly. "You two survived a savage Tai Lung."

"Just another Friday night. Right, Judy?"

"I guess..."

After a moment's pause, Nick stretched his arms. "Well! That about covers it. Okonkwo has the diamond, Scar's going down, and no-one died horribly. Or at all! Good job, guys."

Judy and Carmelita shared a look.

Nick frowned. "What? What's missing?"

Judy exhaled. "There's... someone else we need to help."

Nick quickly guessed who they meant. "...You're kidding, right?"

He looked to Judy, then turned to Carmelita.

They were not kidding.

He rubbed his eyes. "Dammit."

* * *

On street level, the guests were milling around, chattering excitedly. But the roof was quiet. Silent.

Sly sat on an elevated wall, looking out over the city. The view was beautiful, but it was a cold comfort. Bentley and Murray would be waiting for him. He knew he shouldn't leave them hanging like this. He could sulk at the hideout.

But he needed a minute by himself.

He had taken out the photograph he kept in his glove. It was a shot of him and Carmelita during their time together. The camera had caught her surprise as he kissed her on the cheek. The moment after the snapshot, she had burst out laughing.

Her laugh was rare, but marvellous. Lilting, musical. He never got to hear it as her target. Only as her partner.

He missed it terribly.

"Hey."

Someone was on the roof behind him – Judy. He didn't turn around. "Hey."

He could hear the smile in her voice. "Looks like I'm not too late. I was worried I'd miss seeing the zeppelin."

"There's no zeppelin," replied Sly sullenly. "No daring escape."

Judy jumped onto the wall to sit next to him. He didn't object.

After a moment she said "...So, you're not hurt."

"I'm fine," he said. "It's... an escape plan. We call it a Doctor's Note. One of us fakes an injury – something serious, something that'd get you out of police custody and straight into a hospital."

"Except you never make it to the hospital, right? You escape in the ambulance?"

"Something like that."

"Guess I'll have to keep my eye out for that." She smiled. "I appreciate the explanation, but maybe you shouldn't be telling all this to a cop, huh?"

"What does it matter?" he muttered. "I already ruined the heist."

For a few moments, they were quiet.

"Sly... what happened down there?"

He sighed heavily. He took a final look at the photograph before returning it to his glove.

"It was all sewn up _perfectly_. We took down the bad guys and I _had_ the diamond. But..." He shook his head. "I couldn't do it. There was a moment there, when you and Carmelita were looking at me, and I just thought: 'Are you really doing this to them? After everything they've done for you, _this_ is the plan?' And I..." He looked out at the city. "Yeah."

Judy nodded. She paused before speaking. "Y'know, the other night, I had a pretty deep conversation with someone who knows a lot about this stuff."

"Uh oh," said Sly flatly.

"And something he said really stuck with me." She turned to him, smiling gently. "'It's easy to lie to a target. It's very, very hard to lie to someone you like.' I know why you abandoned your plan. It's a concept you may have heard of called 'empathy'."

Sly sighed and seemed to become smaller. Then, he gave Judy a humourless smile. "God. All the other criminals are gonna make fun of me at the next big meeting."

"I can go with you for moral support! If you tell me where it is..."

Despite himself, Sly laughed – but his laughter was interrupted by a new voice cutting harshly through the air. " **You!** Hands in the air, now!"

Sly started, whirling around. Nick stood firm, eyes hard. It took Sly a second to realize that Nick wasn't actually holding a gun – he was just pointing two fingers.

When Sly blinked, Nick relaxed his posture and slipped into a grin. "Well now, someone's jumpy. Almost like you're a thief or something."

Sly glared. "Hilarious, Wilde."

"Hey, you said you expected me to be funny..." He gave Sly a calm smirk. "You can take it easy, Stripes. We're not here to arrest you. Although, for the record, I wanted to! Can you imagine the book deal I'd get as the cop who caught Cooper? I could retire tomorrow." He shrugged nonchalantly. "But I was outvoted. Two to one."

"'Two to...?'"

Nick stepped to one side. Behind him, by the ladder, was Carmelita.

Judy went to stand next to Nick, leaving Sly and Carmelita to watch each other. Sly stood, looking from her to the two cops. "...What is this?"

"Exactly what it looks like," said Judy cheerily. "You two need to talk to each other, face to face. No air-vents, no smoke bombs, no snow leopards. Just... talk."

"We're not just gonna let you run off," added Nick. "It's this or a jail cell."

"This," said Sly, stepping towards her. "Definitely this."

Carmelita strode forward, but she was clearly uncertain. She stopped a few paces away from Sly, her mixed emotions obvious. "...Sly, I..."

"I know," he said sadly. "Me too."

They lapsed into silence, holding each other's gaze.

"Nope!" said Judy.

Sly and Carmelita blinked in perfect unison. "N-nope?" said Sly.

"Yeah, nope," said Nick. "I gotta say, I am _loving_ the minimalism – so much emotion in so few words! – but we're going to need to see something a little more concrete than that. Try harder."

Carmelita shot him a glare, but then took a deep breath. "...Sly."

"Yeah?"

"That... was pretty good work down there. Good job."

"You too," he said, perking up a little. "Not that I expect any less."

She folded her arms. "Y'know, it occurs to me... We're both pretty successful. As much as I hate what you do, you're good at it."

"Um, thanks?"

"But," she said, "all the of the really impressive stuff we've done... we've done together. When things get serious and we stop playing our stupid game of cops and robbers and start acting like... partners. That's how we win the truly important battles. Clockwerk, Neyla, Doctor M..."

"Le Paradox," added Sly. Carmelita made an 'eh' gesture with one hand.

"Point being... We're clearly a great team. In more ways than one. Can't we make this work?"

"I'd like that. Honestly. But..."

Her eyes narrowed. " _But_ here comes the excuse. Don't tell me – you have to be a thief, right? Because you're a Cooper?"

"No!" said Sly. He sagged. "...I don't know."

"C'mon, Sly!" said Judy from the side. "I meant what I said last night! You don't _have_ to be anything – it's your choice."

"You aren't your father," said Nick with quiet conviction.

Sly sighed. "I... I dunno. The truth is, I'm unsure of myself. More than I ever have been. I don't know what I want any more." He looked Carmelita in the eyes. "But I do know that I don't ever want to hurt you again."

Carmelita exhaled. "That's... good to hear. You'll forgive me if I don't fully believe it, but... I want to. I _want_ to trust you again. I really do." She smiled at the ground. "And after tonight... after what you did... maybe I can. Start to, at least. You're not off the hook yet."

He smirked. "Wouldn't have it any other way."

Carmelita gave him a tired look. "No, Sly. You're supposed to _want_ to be off the hook. That's... that's what we're trying to..."

"No, no," said Sly quickly. "I mean... you shouldn't forgive me just yet. I want to earn it."

"Oh. Oh, right."

"Not that we should go back to... yeah, sorry."

"No, I get it."

"Yeah."

"Yeah."

"Wow," said Nick softly. "What a beautiful, heart-warming trainwreck." Judy elbowed him.

"I'll make it up to you," said Sly. He looked more confident now. More alive. "I promise."

"Alright." Carmelita shifted her weight, still sincere but more playful. "First step is to stop faking your death in front of me. Never do that again."

"Noted. What's the next step?"

"I'm not sure." She smirked. "But I'll think of something, Ringtail."

Judy nudged Nick and mouthed " _Aaah! 'Ringtail'! That's so cute!_ " and Nick rolled his eyes, smiling.

Sly shrugged. "I could happily spend all night talking, but the guys are waiting for me. I think it's about time I slipped away."

Carmelita's smirk grew. "How about a ten-second head start? For old time's sake."

"I'd like that. Honestly, it's probably ten more seconds than I deserve."

"Mmh." Carmelita turned to Nick. "Make sure he doesn't handcuff me to anything."

"Uh... will do."

"Alright, Ringtail." Her eyes sparkled in the half-light. "Your ten seconds start now."

Ten. Sly returned her smirk.

Nine. Judy watched, curious.

Eight. Nick folded his arms.

Seven. A cold breeze rolled across the roof.

Six. Carmelita nonchalantly checked her pistol.

Five. Sly let out a breath, looking to the side.

Four. Sly turned back – and Carmelita had covered the distance between them, pulling him into a kiss.

"Oh!" said Judy. Nick blinked. After a moment of surprise, Sly gratefully returned the kiss. They spent the last three seconds in a tight embrace.

Finally, Carmelita pulled away. She was grinning. "Too easy, Ringtail. You've gone soft."

Sly reached up to brush her hair behind her ear. "Maybe it's about time I did," he murmured.

He pulled away, not without a certain amount of reluctance. "I'll work something out," he said, more firmly. "After all, we've all got our own ways of making the world a better place..."

He hopped back onto the wall, looking down to ground level. Scar sat in the back of the police cruiser, glaring sourly out the window.

"And I've got an idea for what I can do next." He turned back to Carmelita. "...I'll call you."

"You better," she said simply.

Sly smirked, then looked to Nick and Judy. "Thanks, you two. For everything. You've made this a very memorable trip."

Judy smiled. "You're welcome."

"No you're not," said Nick drily.

"Do me a favour," said Sly. "Look after each other. This city is lucky to have you. I can honestly say I wish more cops were like you."

Nick raised an eyebrow. "What? Really?"

"Of course." Sly smirked. "If every team was as good as you two... Can you imagine the challenge?"

He gave the three of them a casual salute. Then he gently leaned backwards and fell off the roof.

Judy and Carmelita watched him go with quiet smiles. Nick screamed.

" **Oh god!** Is he – did he just–?!"

"What? Oh, Nick, no," said Judy quickly. "He has a – look."

She pulled him nearer the edge and pointed to Sly, descending through the night air on his paraglider.

"Oh," said Nick. "Okay. He has a... yeah..." Nick sagged, taking a deep breath. "I hate all of you," he muttered under his breath. " _So_ much."

Carmelita put a hand to her cheek. "That was... surprisingly constructive," she said softly. After a moment, she turned and walked away. "I've got business to attend to downstairs. I'll see you soon."

"Oh," said Judy, "are you going to help Clawhauser?"

Carmelita paused at the ladder. "...He has things under control."

Nick and Judy shared a look. "Then what is it?" asked Nick.

"It's been a long night," said Carmelita. "A long week, really. I'm going downstairs and having some damn champagne."

"You do that," said Nick. "You've earned it. We'll be down soon."

"Take your time. You've earned that." She turned and climbed down the first few rungs.

"Hey, wait," said Judy. Carmelita stopped, looking up. "Remind me in the morning to get your e-mail."

Carmelita raised an eyebrow. "My e-mail address should already be logged with your department."

"Not your work e-mail, silly," smiled Judy. "Your personal one! We should stay in touch!"

Carmelita cleared her throat. "I, uh... only have one. Which I use for work."

"I'm honestly not sure whether I'm surprised," said Nick flatly.

"Maybe I'll make a new one." Carmelita looked over the city thoughtfully. "I've... always kind of wanted a penpal."

"Well, now you have two!" said Judy, eyes bright.

Carmelita smiled. "Thank you. I'll... see you down there."

"Yeah, of course!"

"Thanks, Carmelita," said Nick.

"You too." With that, she slid down the ladder – leaving Nick and Judy alone in the night air.

Nick turned, looking out over the city. "Nice view, huh? Kinda makes you think... I mean, the sheer amount of people in this city is–" and Judy hugged him tightly, burying her face in his chest.

For a second he stood there, blinking. Judy's voice was muffled by his shirt. "Hug me back, you dummy..."

"Oh. Oh! Um..." Nick hesitated, but then he knelt down to match her height. He returned the embrace, gently patting her head. "C'mon, Carrots. It's okay."

"It's not..." said Judy. "I've been acting like a complete idiot. I'm so sorry."

"Hey, it's alright," said Nick softly. "I was a jerk about it."

"No! _I_ was the jerk."

"Yeah, you were the jerk," he said placidly, and Judy laughed.

They pulled away a little, and Nick noticed that Judy's eyes were wet. "Hey! Don't you dare start crying." He was squinting a little despite his smile. "If _you_ start crying, I'll be obligated as your partner to very seriously consider crying too. Y'know, to... make it less weird. For you. So please, spare us both."

She giggled, wiping her eyes with sleeve. "Sure. Sure. I'll try." She took a deep breath, then looked Nick in the eye. "I am sorry, though. Really. Is there anything I can...?"

Nick's warm smile slowly became mischievous. He held up the carrot pen.

Judy looked to the pen and back to Nick, her ears drooping. "No," she whined.

He waved it gently. "Sounds like you're not committed to apologising after all. What a shame..."

She sighed heavily. Then she leaned into the microphone as Nick pressed the button. "I really am just a dumb bunny," she said flatly. "There."

Nick played the clip back – " _I really am just a dumb bunny._ " – and nodded, satisfied. "Alright. You know the rules."

"Forty-eight hours. Yeah."

He stood, growing serious. "Jokes aside... I gotta ask. Was... today as terrible for you as it was for me?"

"You mean... not working with each other? After this morning?" She fiddled with her paws. "Yeah. It was pretty awful."

"Well, at least that makes me feel better... Okay. In that case, the best way you can make it up to me is to _talk_ to me. About... everything. If you have a problem, please, _please_ just tell me. I don't want to argue with you like that ever again."

"Me neither," said Judy firmly. "And it goes both ways. If you're... worried about what I'm doing, let me know. I'll slow down. You're not my sidekick, or my caretaker. You're my partner." She smiled up at him. "And I'm really glad to have you."

"Yeah," he said, returning it. "I... yeah. Me too, Judy."

He went to the wall, sitting where Sly had been. She followed suit, and together they took in the view.

"Y'know," said Nick, "I see Sly and Carmelita as a warning. I don't want to end up like them."

"Yeah." Judy smiled. "I'm optimistic that they can work things out, but we can definitely try to avoid their mistakes."

Nick smirked. "We'll go out and make new, exciting mistakes, to call our own. Right?"

She laughed. "Right."

Judy shuffled a little closer and rested her head against Nick's shoulder. At first, he did nothing. Then he brought his arm around her, laying his hand on her shoulder. They sat quietly for a while.

Eventually, Judy spoke. "...You were right, you know. You're a better cop than me."

"I dunno," he said evenly. "I don't think either of us is the 'better' cop. We're just... different."

Judy smiled. "That's exactly what the better cop would say."

Nick raised a hand in mock defence. "Fine, fine. I can tell you won't let this go, so I'll just give it to you. I, Officer Nick Wilde, am completely amazing. Happy?"

Judy sighed. "...Yeah. I am."

Below them, the subway train pulled away and Clawhauser's squad car headed for headquarters and the crowds chattered about how this was easily the most exciting party of the year. But at that moment none of it mattered. For a few quiet minutes, the partners put aside their responsibilities and simply enjoyed the cool night air, the sparkling lights of the city, and each other's company.

Night in Zootopia.


	21. Epilogue - Of Heists & Hustles

There weren't many holding cells at ZPD Headquarters, but one basement corridor had a short stretch. They were small and utilitarian, containing little more than a bed. Scar's was still messy. Peridot had carefully made hers without being told.

She was pacing a nervous circle around her cell, muttering to herself. Across the hallway, Scar sat calmly on his bed, eyes closed, poised.

Peridot glanced up. When she saw Scar's posture, she almost tripped. " _What?!_ Why are you so _calm?!_ You should be **panicking!** Why aren't you _**panicking?!**_ "

Scar simply smiled.

"Do you know something I don't? Maybe I was wrong to doubt you..." Peridot paused, thinking. "What could you possibly be keeping as your secret trump card? Hmm... Oh! Maybe Tai Lung will break in and rescue us." She frowned. "Wait, no. He must know we're the ones who poisoned him." She bristled, clapping her paws to her face. "Maybe Tai Lung will break in and _kill us!_ "

Scar chuckled. "No, no. Nothing of the sort." He grimaced uncertainly. "I hope."

"Oh... Then what is it?"

"Let me tell you a little secret, Dorothy," said Scar, opening his eyes. "The world is full of strife and difference. Conflicts. Prey versus predator, order versus chaos, 'good versus _evil'_. None of it really matters in the end. There is but one thing in this world that has true value."

"Um," said Peridot, "friendship?"

"Good lord, no," said Scar. " _Money_. Money for bail. Money for a strong legal team. Money to throw at whatever slap on the wrist I'm sentenced to." His smile didn't waver, but he clenched a fist. "Money to go into a nice little fund for making the lives of Wilde, Hopps and Cooper an absolute living _hell_. Point being: as long as you have money... life goes on."

At the end of the corridor, the door swung open. Bogo strode through, carrying a clipboard. "Good morning, you two. Hope you had a restful night."

Scar stood, his smirk melting into a sour frown. "I knew you'd make an appearance to _gloat_. Hear me, Bogo – if you or one of your cronies so much as lays a finger on me, I swear I'll–!"

"Settle down," said Bogo calmly. "You'll be treated with the utmost care and respect, I assure you. I'm just here to give you some news."

"Oh goodie." Scar folded his arms. "And what would that be?"

Bogo stood in front of Scar's cell – behind him, Peridot pressed her face against the bars, curious. Bogo glanced at his clipboard before looking Scar in the eye. "Last night, someone broke into your house."

"What?!" Scar's surprise only lasted a moment before giving way to fury. "I – Cooper! It was Cooper, wasn't it?! What did he take?!"

"A substantial amount of your possessions, as far as we can tell," said Bogo. "And yes, it was Cooper. We found one of his little cards on the scene. Several, actually." He took out his reading glasses. "That said..."

"What?"

"Not all of your property was _stolen_..."

* * *

" _Man, these pictures are_ _ **ugly,**_ _" said Murray, frowning uncertainly at a portrait he had unhooked from the wall. "Do we have to take them?"_

 _"Well, no," said Sly, walking down the corridor with two bags of loot over his shoulders. "The important thing is just that Scar doesn't have them."_

 _"Huh," said Murray. "I think I get what you're saying."_

 _Then he punched through the portrait, tossed it aside, and moved on to the next one._

* * *

"Those filthy _degenerates!_ " snapped Scar. "How dare they desecrate my home! I'll see justice is done – they'll _hang_ for this!" He turned to Bogo. "What's the status of my bail? I need to get out of here immediately."

"Well, that's a shame," said Bogo, putting on his glasses. "Unless someone you know is feeling _very_ charitable, you're not going anywhere for the foreseeable future."

"What?! But my electronic funds–"

"Were also hit."

* * *

 _Bentley generally made a rule against cracking into bank systems to steal money. It just wasn't as satisfying as a physical heist. Something about it was unsportsmanlike; it was too easy, too blunt. But Scar would be given no chance to recover._

 _Besides, rules were meant to be broken._

 _He smiled at his laptop's screen as all the numbers ticked down to zero. "That's the last of Scar's assets," he said smugly. "Now there's only the question of where to put it all. I'm open to suggestions."_

 _Sly threw his bags of loot into the back of the van. "Anywhere?"_

 _"Anywhere. I can set up programs to donate small amounts over time, so we can give it to anyone we'd like. No suspicion."_

 _Sly shifted his weight. "How's the museum doing?"_

 _"Between some hefty insurance payments, and squeezing money out of what's left of O'Donnell's security firm, they'll be just fine."_

 _"Give them some anyway. We broke a lot of stuff. And, hey, put some in Toriel's campaign funds."_

 _"Excellent idea. She won't forget how you saved her son – and I think it could be very useful for the mayor of Zootopia to owe us a favour."_

 _"Well, there's that. But have you heard her reform policies for the orphanage system? Good stuff."_

 _"Agreed. Anything else?"_

 _Sly smirked. "Yeah. Give the rest to the ZPD."_

 _Bentley raised an eyebrow. "Seriously? You do realize that could make things much harder if we end up pulling another job here, right?"_

 _"Oh, I'm counting on it."_

* * *

Scar stared. "It... it can't all be gone."

Bogo consulted his clipboard. "Looks like it is, I'm afraid."

Scar gripped the cell bars very tightly and took a deep breath. "Real estate," he said finally. "The house is worth a substantial sum. As much as it pains me to part with it, I could... Oh, what **now?!** " Scar glared at Bogo, who was clearly waiting to speak. "Don't stand there and act you aren't aren't enjoying every second of this!"

"I don't know where you're getting that impression," said Bogo very evenly.

Bogo was, indeed, enjoying every second of this. But he was a professional, and had been for decades. He knew how to keep a straight face.

"I can _tell_ you've got some ridiculous tragedy to spring on me!" snapped Scar. "So what is it? Did they burn down my home? Vandalise it? Open it to the _homeless?!_ "

"No," said Bogo. "They fired a subway train at it."

* * *

 _The train sped along the elevated tracks at dangerous speeds, helped by the fact it was completely empty. A small metallic device was wired into the controls, remotely steering it._

 _It barrelled toward a corner and didn't slow and with a terrible snapping noise it burst through the rails. It soared from the tracks, immediately losing altitude, but its trajectory had been precisely calculated and it hit its mark._

 _The train smashed through one side of Scar's house and kept going until it hit the opposite wall. Windows exploded, ceilings collapsed. In a matter of seconds, the stately manor became a pile of broken masonry and gently settling dust._

 _The Cooper Gang watched with satisfaction from a nearby rooftop._

" _Al_ ** _right!_** _" shouted Murray. "That was a totally awesome act of architectural abuse!"_

 _"Absolutely," said Sly. "Just like the Contessa jailbreak. You're still great at firing trains at buildings, Bentley."_

 _"It's not exactly a skill you forget. Told you we'd find a use for it."_

 _"I was wrong to ever doubt you."_

* * *

There was silence for a moment. Peridot peered through the bars, blinking.

"...It's insured." Scar's voice was almost inaudible. "It's all insured. Everything."

Bogo tapped the clipboard. "...Ah. About that. You haven't had a chance to check your e-mail."

Scar didn't want to know.

He really didn't.

But he had to ask.

"...What?"

Bogo produced a printout. "This came from your insurance company. Seems they noticed a problem with your account early this morning. Something about your first name being incorrect...?"

Scar's eye twitched.

"Anyway," said Bogo, "your coverage was suspended approximately twenty-seven minutes before the break-in."

Scar's other eye starting twitching too.

He sat on the bed and stared at the wall.

"Are you alright, Mr Kifalme?" said Bogo.

"Mnah," said Scar.

"Don't worry, Scar!" called Peridot. "Tai Lung might still break in and kill you!"

"That's not too likely," said Bogo. "He woke up a few hours ago. He's been surprisingly cooperative – he's looking forward to having this matter fully resolved in court." Bogo removed his glasses and slipped them into his shirt pocket. "Of course, if he did pose a danger to you, you would have the full protection of the ZPD. Your safety is a priority. After all, we're looking forward to the court hearing as well."

Scar said nothing. He simply sat and stared.

Bogo cleared his throat. "...Alright, then. We'll give you some time, but someone will be along to question you in shortly. That goes for you as well, Miss Perrault."

"Yes, sir! Understood, sir!" chirped Peridot.

"Good." Bogo went to leave, but stopped. He turned back to Scar. "Oh, and, Mr Kifalme?"

Scar's eyes moved up, but he didn't seem to really be looking at him. "Mrrh?"

"Don't worry about the break-in." Bogo gave him a slight smile. "We have our finest officers on the case."

* * *

Sly took one last look through the auto-shop before closing the front door. It had served them well – it was a good hideout.

But this city was so huge, and so beautiful. They'd stay somewhere else next time.

The van was in the driveway, ready for their departure. Murray was hefting Bentley, wheelchair and all, into the back. It was no effort, especially considering he had been doing it for years.

Bentley noticed Sly. "Well? All set?"

"I think so, yeah."

Murray set down Bentley, then headed for the driver's seat. "You remember to leave the extra cash?" he asked.

Sly smirked. "Oh yeah. The owner will have no problem buying a new kitchen table. He can buy himself a kitchen-table factory if he wants."

"Great," said Bentley flatly. "Then let's hurry up and leave, shall we? I'd like to get clear before –"

" **Stop right there, Cooper!** "

"I don't know why I bother," sighed Bentley to himself.

Sly whirled around. He was beaming before he even saw her.

Standing on the auto-shop's roof, shock pistol in hand, was Carmelita. She glared down at him. "So this is where you've been hiding. Shame I didn't find it sooner."

"Agreed," smirked Sly. He was back on familiar ground. "You know you're always welcome to swing by for a chat, maybe a cup of coffee. But I'm afraid we were just leaving."

"Oh no you aren't!" She readied her pistol. "I'm not letting you slip away – not without a fight!"

Sly's smirk faded, becoming a more genuine smile. "I expect nothing less."

"Well then. You better get moving... Ringtail."

She returned his smile, and gave him the barest hint of a wink.

Then she opened fire.

Sly dodged a shot by leaping for the van. In one smooth motion he slid through the window and into the seat next to Murray. "Punch it!"

Murray slammed the accelerator and the van shot out of the driveway, tires crunching in the snow. But they didn't get far. He hit the brakes to avoid crashing into a police cruiser which pulled suddenly into their path.

Sly's eyes widened – and he grinned. He gave Judy a friendly salute through the windscreen. She kept a tight grip on the steering wheel, but flashed him a smile. Next to her, in the passenger seat, Nick adjusted his sunglasses. He lounged comfortably, lazily rotating the popsicle in his mouth.

His carefully maintained boredom was disrupted by a loud bang from their car's roof. With an impressive flip, Carmelita had leapt onto the cruiser. She crouched low, pistol ready, her eyes alive with fire.

Judy and Nick both looked up. "Well, that's not within ZPD regulations..." murmured Nick.

"Well, it is for Interpol!" said Carmelita with a vicious grin. "So hit it!"

"Yes, ma'am!" said Judy enthusiastically.

Murray was prepared. He put the van into reverse and pulled into a sweeping turn, using the ice on the roads to his advantage, sliding backwards into the driveway and then exploding forward to turn from the cruiser and speed away in the other direction. The cruiser was hot on their tail. Carmelita kept one hand on the roof to steady herself against the high wind and twisting path of the car. With the other, she raised her pistol and opened fire.

The van juddered as a blast impacted against the black doors. "Sl _yyyyy_ ," called Bentley, his voice wobbling from motion and stress, "get on the roof and try to draw her fire!"

"You got it!" Sly reached through the window and pulled himself up, flipping over to land feet-first. He sauntered across the roof, completely at ease. "Could you take it down a notch?" he called to Carmelita. "Bolts of electricity can really mess up the paint job!"

Carmelita growled – then her eyes widened. " **Down!** "

Without turning, Sly ducked low to the roof. The van sped under a set of hanging traffic lights. The thick metal pole passed over Sly's head, just brushing the tips of his ears.

"Sorry sorry sorry sorry!" called Murray. "I'll warn you before the next one!"

"No worries, pal." Sly waved to Carmelita. "Uh, thanks!"

She smirked. "Oh, please, Ringtail. When I get my hands on you – and I _will_ – I want you in one piece!"

He sighed, laying a hand on his heart. "You always did know _just_ what to say..."

In the cruiser, Nick rolled his eyes. "These two..." He glanced around, checking the road signs. "Hey, try to push them south," he said to Judy. "The roads by Bering Plaza are an absolute nightmare. It's a maze down there."

"Copy that!" She twisted into a sharp turn. "Think we can corner them?"

"Eh. Probably not." He paused to lick the popsicle. "It'd be fun to watch them get lost, though."

"Heh! Yeah." She stole a glance at him. "Hey... let me know if I'm going too fast, okay?"

Nick scoffed gently. "Don't worry about me, Carrots. I'm having a great time."

"Me too, partner." Judy sighed contently as the cruiser lurched over a speed bump. "Me too..."

The chase continued. Sly dodged blasts and felt the cold wind whipping around him; Carmelita kept firing, never letting him out of her sight. Murray sped and swerved and weaved, making sure the van stayed ahead; Judy matched him at every turn, never giving up. Bentley consulted his maps and adapted their route on the fly; Nick sat comfortably and ate his popsicle and told Judy exactly where to go.

All in all, it was a fun afternoon.

* * *

 _For a city like Zootopia, even master thieves came and went. In the weeks after the diamond heist, life continued._

 _The mayoral election wore on, although there was a steady decrease in the number of candidates, for a multitude of reasons; old age, political fatigue, and – in more than one case, actually – criminal arrest. After a long and winding campaign, the election was won in a landslide. The papers all ran the same photograph of Toriel posing happily with her family. She pledged to implement her reforms as quickly as possible. Much to her own embarrassment, Gazelle still ended up in fourth place overall._

 _The court cases of Scar's gang proceeded reasonably well, despite becoming something of a media circus. Scar represented himself, fighting the charges tooth and claw, but it did him no good. Peridot's extensive records were all the evidence the jury needed. Despite having relatively little to add, Tai Lung also insisted on testifying against Scar, spitefully determined to make him suffer as he himself had. Mufasa took time out from work to attend as much of Scar's trial as possible. He sat in the front row of the public gallery, watching his brother with tired eyes._

 _Ultimately, all members of what the tabloids referred to as the 'Scar Six' were given jail sentences. However, they all found different things waiting for them behind bars._

 _Tai Lung returned to prison apathetically – there was no real difference in his eyes between a physical jail and the more abstract prisons of the outside world. He soon found a new way to amuse himself, however – gleefully ruining other prisoners' escape attempts. He also took up pottery._

 _Peridot's plea bargain substantially reduced her sentence, but she was far too complicit to walk away free. She was put into a cell with another lynx – a young vandal calling herself 'Amethyst'. Despite their differences, they soon warmed up to each other. Peridot taught Amethyst how to live efficiently and effectively in a prison environment. Amethyst taught Peridot, in turn, how to be less of a clod._

 _Scar tried to remain optimistic about prison life, and that optimism was apparently rewarded when the first people he met in the yard were Shenzi, Banzai and Ed. He had greeted them warmly as friends, but Shenzi said friends didn't poison each other, and asked what Banzai thought, and Banzai said he certainly didn't consider Scar a 'friend' any more, and asked what Ed thought, and Ed laughed. And laughed. And laughed._

 _The guards broke up the ensuing brawl. Eventually._

 _Wolf O'Donnell disappeared into the night, leaving Okonkwo with a considerable security shortage. His call for new guards was met with many applications, and one in particular caught his eye. The applicant's criminal record, he felt, was more than made up for by the letters of recommendation from two esteemed officers of the ZPD._

 _Finnick took well to his new job as security guard. What he lacked in size he more than made up for in presence. During Finnick's shifts, visitors knew better than to touch the exhibits._

 _The new security was proven mercifully unnecessary. Word spread quickly throughout the criminal underworld, and while details varied, the general story was the same; the Cooper Gang had tried to steal the diamond, and even they had failed._

 _The gang made no attempt to alter that story. It was perhaps the best protection the Nope Diamond could ever be given. Their silence following the heist added to it, making it seem as though the failure had been so terrible it had crushed their spirit. The truth was different._

 _They retired to one of their oldest hideouts – somewhere that truly felt like home. They joked about how, since travelling the globe was their daily grind, going home was their equivalent of a vacation. But it wasn't all video games and pizza. They talked at length about what exactly they should do next. Bentley, of course, had plenty of ideas. Murray contributed frequently, and with his signature aplomb. Sly mostly listened._

 _At night Sly would head up to the roof. He had set up a hammock there, and for hours at a time he would lie under the stars. Sometimes he read and reread the newspaper clipping of his father's heist. Sometimes he looked at the photograph of himself and Carmelita. Mostly he watched the night sky and thought._

 _He'd figure it out. He always did._

 _And as soon as he did, Carmelita was only a call away._

 _She waited to hear from him, quietly hopeful. But until he got in touch, she did what she always did; she threw herself at her work. As soon as she returned from Zootopia, Carmelita was back to kicking down doors and tackling perps with her typical fiery efficiency. Although she considered it business as usual, her co-workers noticed something of a change in her. She was less terse in the office, more prone to casual conversation. They figured the trip had gone well for her, but it was more because of her newfound correspondence._

 _Every week – at minimum, usually more often – she'd exchange a long email with her two new penpals. They frequently discussed work, swapping war stories and office gossip in equal measure. But they knew they could trust her with more personal news as well._

 _Nick and Judy talked. Not much more than they already did – because that was almost impossible – but in greater depth. Judy admitted to her recklessness, as well as her concerns about her social life. Nick voiced his anxieties; about his future as a police officer, about Judy, about anything and everything and nothing. Vitally, they listened to each other._

 _Life continued. There were leads to follow and witnesses to question and huge stacks of paperwork to gnaw through. But although they were dedicated to their jobs – even earning the occasional brisk compliment from Bogo – they found time to relax. Nick enjoyed the evenings they spent laughing in Ruby's bar; Judy loved the late-night talks they'd share after a long day of work. They both liked to visit Okonkwo's museum every so often. They'd sit in front of the Nope Diamond and spend a while quietly admiring it._

 _It was comforting to see something exactly where it was meant to be._

* * *

 **"Of Heists and Hustles"**  
Starring  
 _Kevin Miller_ **as** _Sly Cooper_  
 _Ginnifer Goodwin_ **as** _Judy Hopps_  
 _Jason Bateman_ **as** _Nick Wilde_  
 _Grey Griffin_ **as** _Carmelita Fox_  
 _Idris Elba_ **as** _Chief Bogo_  
 _Chris Murphy_ **as** _Murray_  
 _Matt Olsen_ **as** _Bentley_  
 _Ian McShane_ **as** _Tai Lung_  
 _Shelby Rabara_ **as** _Peridot_  
 **and  
** _Jeremy Irons_ **as** _Scar_

 **Also Featuring the Voices of**  
 _Chadwick Boseman_ **as** _T'Challa Okonkwo_  
 _Nate Torrence_ **as** _Benjamin Clawhauser_  
 _Whoopi Goldberg_ **as** _Shenzi Veldetta_  
 _Cheech Marin_ **as** _Banzai_  
 _Jim Cummings_ **as** _Ed_  
 _Tommy "Tiny" Lister_ **as** _Finnick_  
 _Matthew Gafford_ **as** _W. O'Donnell_  
 _Lindsay Bolin_ **as** _Toriel Dreemurr_  
 _Daniella Van Dreel_ **as** _Asriel Dreemurr_  
 _Lindsay Jones_ **as** _Ruby Rose_  
 _Arryn Zech_ **as** _Blake Belladonna_  
 _Mark "Rhino" Smith_ **as** _Officer McHorn_  
 _Fabienne Rawley_ **as** _Fabienne Growley (heh)_  
 _Peter Mansbridge_ **as** _Peter Moosebridge_  
 **and  
** _A Bunch of Actors Not on IMDB_ **as** _Everybody Else_

* * *

 _ **Hey there! Thanks for sticking with this long and ridiculous story. It was an absolute pleasure to write, although I guess that's not much a surprise. Turns out gluing my favourite movie to my favourite game series was a lot of fun! Who would've guessed?**_

 _ **I'd like to extend my sincerest gratitude to everybody who read and Kudos'd this story, with especially huge thanks to everyone who left a Comment. Seriously, you're all lovely. Getting such nice feedback on this story has been a real bright spot these past few months. Specific thanks must also go to my wonderful writing buddy (and also sister!) SparkleFists. She proofread every chapter of this story before they went live and listened patiently to my constant ramblings about talking animals – which, in fairness, she's had to endure for years now. Thank youuuuuuuuu~!**_

 _ **Well, you just read a novel's worth of me writing, so I won't keep you any longer. I'm gonna go catch up on college work and try really hard to not write any more novel-length crossover fanfictions. For a while, at least. See you after Zootopia 2! Or Sly 5, maybe.** _  
_**(Look, a man can dream, okay?!)**_


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